We can probably all agree that learning a new language isn’t the easiest thing in the world. At the same time, it’s a very good way to spend your time, as being multi-lingual can be very beneficial in the long run.
Also, using your non-native language can put you in some funny situations that later turn into amusing stories you can tell at every party. That’s where our focus is today – funny stories of people using foreign languages and failing entertainingly.
More info: Instagram
#1
I was in Ecuador on a missionary trip with my church, I over dressed one day and was burning up but had nowhere to put my jacket and sweater. I asked over and over at every store I walked by, every street vendor, anywhere for a bag, but I called it “bolsa” (I’m Puerto Rican, thats how we say it). No one hooked me up, most times people waled away with a face of disgust. Again and again I kept asking for a big bag, because I only had a tiny bag at the time. The local pastor that we met heard me at one point and ran to me, told me to keep quiet and then asked me what I needed… my response, a bolsa… a bag. Apparently you have to ask for a “funda”, in that country I was pretty much asking for a sack of mens balls. Literal balls. So I walked around saying “do you have balls? My balls are too small and I need big balls”. Good times.
Image source: 0rense, Stephanie Ho
#2
For years, I used the expression “up yours” as a congratulatory phrase, and nobody corrected me. Be nice to your foreigners. Correct them when they are wrong.
Image source: ombrettadidio, fauxels
#3
When I was learning English I thought having an affair meant to fight, because when I saw having an affair on TV the people were always fighting. Had to write an essay for my English class about a typical morning, and wrote how my mom was having an affair with my brother
Image source: wegski , photo nic
#4
I am Canadian. My husband is Australian. Family friend flew over from Australia and offered to nurse a Canadian woman’s baby on the plane. The Canadian very firmly told her “no thanks”. She didn’t understand why the woman was so offended. In Australia when they say nurse a baby, it means to hold. In Canada when we say nurse a baby, it means to breastfeed. We still laugh about it.
Image source: jillybeans80 , RDNE Stock project
#5
So, my beautiful little German grandmother and wife of a minister… asked (in front of a whole group of people at church) a friend that had recently gotten married… if he enjoyed using his dads condom on his honeymoon. She meant condo… condominium.
Image source: christimorrow_, Askar Abayev
#6
Was ordering dinner in Danish in Denmark, the word for chicken is “kylling”, but as an American I pronounced it as “killing” which translates into “kitten” – so the waitress at the restaurant was a bit horrified at my request for BBQ baby cat 😂
Image source: howdyeliza , Pixabay
#7
I was going to college in the US when I saw a sign “beware of the pedestrians” and I asked the people I was with what kind of animal a pedestrian is.
Image source: msgies , Kaique Rocha
#8
I went to Spain with my husband and kept saying “escuchame!” Thinking I was saying “excuse me” And he would die laughing every time. He finally told me I was saying “LISTEN TO ME!” To everyone
Image source: jenessa_sturgell, Samson Katt
#9
In a business context I once asked a colleague for a favour and added « do I need to do doggy style » (instead of doggy eyes) the whole open space burst in laughter. I didn’t even know what it meant at the time so was very confused but I blushed really hard once the colleague explained in the coffee area 🤔😬🥴
Image source: myfrenchplate, Dominika Roseclay
#10
I was a high school exchange student in Germany and was eating dinner with my host family. I tried Liver for the first time. I explained it was “mushy”….l didn’t know that Muschi in German slang meant Pus*y. My host family stared at me in shock.
Image source: danaaaa_37, stu_spivack
#11
When living in China I raised my arms to adjust my hair and accidently smacked a little kid in the face. I told him “you’re welcome” instead of “I’m sorry.” Lol.
Image source: little_redant13, Pixabay
#12
A little kid dressed as a dinosaur roared at me in Peru and I said ‘tengo mierda’ (I have [poop]) instead of ‘tengo miedo’ (I’m scared). Whoops.
Image source: thebirdfromblighty
#13
Join a few friends for lasertag when I moved to Germany. Random kids would come to me pointing their guns and they would shout Kartoffel (potato). I had no idea why, just assumed it was slang toall someone you just hit a potato 🥔. So I started doing the same. Bang bang and Kartoffel here and Kartoffel there. I was the queen of the potatos! During one of the breaks a friend ask: hey, why do you keep shouting Kartoffel (potato)? I explained, that was what the kids were saying. My friend first rolled his eyes than he laughed! Turns out the kids were saying ‘getroffen’ (Hit) 🎯 But my German was still so basic all I heard was potatoes!
Image source: mariajblm
#14
Horrified look on cleaning lady’s face when I told her I wanted to whack her (pegar) instead of pay her (pagar). Did it with a big smile all proud of myself. When she recovered we had a big laugh.
Image source: dashesandpours , Andrea Piacquadio
#15
100% true story – upon arriving in the UK from Canada I started telling potential new friends about my family enjoying the Canadian pastime of “cottaging”, which for us means “going to your or a friend’s country home to swim and waterski and build bonfires and stuff”. They looked at me aghast because in the UK it means “having gay sex in a public bathroom”. We DID become friends anyway.
Image source: jacjacjacr , Tatiana Syrikova
#16
When I first moved to the Netherlands, I had a Dutch bf who spoke English very well, but some things got lost in translation. I didn’t speak Dutch at the time, and one day he said his hairdresser friend was quitting her job to become an undertaker. I was shocked and asked why she chose such a drastic career change, and he said, she wants to work for herself and loves making people look beautiful. I thought ok good for her I guess, and we never spoke about it again. It wasn’t until years later (long after we’d broken up) and I’d become fluent in Dutch when I realized, oh…the Dutch word for “entrepreneur” literally translates into “undertaker” (ondernemer). She didn’t want to embalm dead bodies, she wanted to open her own hair salon.
Image source: maggstaa26, cottonbro studio
#17
I was in Dominican Republic with an ice cream cone and a local street boy was eyeing up my ice cream, I was calling him over to give it to him but he was getting close and running away over and over, my Dominican friends said I was mispronouncing the words to call him over and instead was shouting “I’ll cut you, I’ll cut you” so he thought I was saying I’ll cut you if you come near my ice cream while I was making gestures to hand it to him repeatedly😂 😂😂 he did end up grabbing the cone and running full top speed away, pretty risky to take ice cream from a foreign woman yelling she will cut you, he must have really wanted that ice cream 😂😂😂
Image source: heather.offord , Thegiansepillo
#18
When my first son was a toddler I thought “맴매“ meant dirty in Korean. So we’d be at the park and I would caution him something was dirty. Finally when he was like 2.5 my Korean mom friend told me it actually meant spanking. I’d been threatening to spank my toddler in front of other mothers for years. 😑
Image source: mommychachacha, Ketut Subiyanto
#19
When I moved to the UK, whenever I got hungry I told people I was “ravishing” instead of “ravenous”. I guess they assumed I just had excellent self esteem 😂
Image source: devananatura
#20
Ooh I have a fun one. I studied abroad in France. Turns out “preservatif/preservative” in French does not mean preservatives like you find in foods, it means condoms. Have never been met with such confused silence in my life.
Image source: kirstenpastel1 , cottonbro studio
#21
When I moved to Hawaii I worked at a bank telephone bill service. Japanese woman called in and every question I asked her she’d respond “HI”, to which I replied HELLO every single time. 😩 I hung up and told my Asian coworker how nice that woman was. I died when she told me she was responding YES in Japanese. 😂😂😂
Image source: angiepyatt, Ketut Subiyanto
#22
A French-Canadian friend of ours told a great stories from when he was learning English. My favourites were his use of ‘skinny pig’ instead of ‘guinea pig’ and ‘spacegoat’ instead of ‘scapegoat’—both used in business meetings, btw. 😂
Image source: fuzzballphotography, Pixabay
#23
A friend of a friend had moved to the UK from Sweden and had an English boyfriend. In the UK we’re quite liberal with curse words and the bf and his mates would liberally use a word beginning with c amongst themselves. The girlfriend thought it was just a cheeky bit of slang like ‘mate’. Found it wasn’t when having dinner with bf’s parents, the mother made a little joke at the girlfriend’s expense to which she responded “Ha, shut up you c**t!”
Image source: infinite__wilderness
#24
In South Africa we call traffic lights 🚦 Robots. You can imagine the confusion on the drivers face when I said turn left at the robots when I first arrived in the U.K. 😱😂
Image source: ubuntu_yoga_craft
#25
When I went to see a friend at Cambridge University a parent of another student asked me what I read. Bewildered I answered “books”. Turns out, it’s fancy English to ask what one studies. 😅
Image source: mini_ginni
#26
I was still improving my French after moving to Tunisia and was at a friend’s house with a bunch of her relatives. They were asking me about my then boyfriend and asked “il est d’où ?” (Where is he from? I.e. which region). I understood “il est doux ?” (Is he gentle?). I thought it was a bit of a strange personal question, but answered “yes, sometimes”. They all had a good laugh.
Image source: happy_at_work_tunisia, Pavel Danilyuk
#27
Told my dad that no nut November was cutting out nuts from your diet to raise awareness for nut allergies, he’s been telling everyone that he managed a whole month of no nut November!
Image source: deleted.account.20.12, Marta Branco
#28
My Dad is Norwegian and made a few blunders when he first moved to the US. 1. He was at a classical concert and said to the people he went with “see you after the intercourse” instead of intermission. He was so embarrassed he did not return. Which probably made it even more embarrassing 😂😂😂. 2. Having a meal he said “my teeth are running in water”. Which is literally what we say in Norway for “my mouth is watering”. Not embarrassing but still funny 😄
Image source: intuitive.healing.praktijk, Andrea Piacquadio
#29
I have some similar doozies in my book. When we immigrated to America from the former USSR, we didn’t speak English and also didn’t understand that you just can’t abbreviate certain words. My mom was a microbiologist working in a lab and had to leave a note for her lab assistant. She started the note with Dear Lab A*s.., because she was in a rush. Next day she was very confused why that assistant wouldn’t speak with her 😂
Image source: matchbyjulia, Polina Tankilevitch
#30
A female friend who’s quite senior in advertising has been using ‘balls deep’ liberally for years, thinking it just meant ‘lets do this’ and was genuinely mortified when someone explained the actual meaning
Image source: cridom
#31
I lived in Canada for few years now and at the tim hortons I always ordered bagel with ‘urban garlic cream cheese’ and they always got the order right but last week I bought a cream cheese that said ‘ herb and garlic’ no one ever corrected me and I just believed it might be some type of Garlic 🫣
Image source: humanbee_30 , RDNE Stock project
#32
My godmother was invited to her neighbor’s house for a pot party. She thought they meant like a potluck. She was the only one who brought food. 😂
Image source: elviralynn84
#33
When I was in the hospital almost 19 years ago for alcoholism, my husband came to visit me. When he went up to the desk, the worker asked if he needed validation. His first thought was, “Tell me I’m good!” It had been a rough few days since I was hospitalized. I’ve been sober since February 14, 2005
Image source: rashaforreal
#34
i have one! spanish is my second language and i use it at work sometimes if i need to. i was talking to a husband and wife from venezuela holding their newborn baby and i was asking her about breastfeeding/milk expression. i used teta for breast because i had known it to mean that? lol like i didn’t know in some countries it means titty. so they get really wide eyes and the husband says so me “esa palabra es un poco grosera, no?” meaning that’s a little crude, isn’t it? okay so the right term is pecho 😐 but then weeks later i had a family from argentina and the grandmother used teta! so i told her the story and she laughed and laughed and said to them it’s not vulgar but it is in other countries. now i know 🙊
Image source: ashley.camilleeee, MART PRODUCTION
#35
On my second year here someone told me they’re having a hard day because they had to put the cat to sleep. I asked why couldn’t she sleep by herself?
Image source: dp98g, Ihsan Adityawarman
#36
oh yes I remember my first time in the US, I was 16. I was by myself in a mall, and had to pee. I looked everywhere, on every floor..Nothing. All I could find was signs for chill out room, “restroom”. when i finally found the Toilet, I had learned a New word :)
Image source: mrs_kro
#37
I’m from the US..I visited my friends in Scotland for some time and after the first night staying with them, in the morning my friend asked “how was your lay?” I was so embarrassed thinking that she thought I brought someone home. I guess that’s how they ask how you slept
Image source: wafflesthebrindle , Tânia Mousinho
#38
I’m English and was working in a theme park store in the states, a customer asked how many dollars for a pack of postcards, I said in my Essex accent, free (3), she walked out with a whole bunch, had to chase her down and explain it’s my accent, they’re not free 😂😂
Image source: lk_plus_three
#39
More cultural barrier than language barrier. On the train I overheard some Americans “digestive biscuits… do those really work?”
Image source: nic_good_life, DiscordDonut
#40
When I was in Spain and spoke limited Spanish, I was in a public restroom asking anyone if there was any “sopa” for “soap” instead of “jabón.” Maybe the same day I ordered lasagna from a beachside restaurant, and nobody brought me silverware to eat it with. I couldn’t remember the word for “fork,” “spoon,” or “silverware,” and I was too embarrassed to pantomime, so I just ate it with my bare hands and then went into the ocean to wash my hands like that was normal. 😅
Image source: ms.heathercita, William Rouse
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