Let’s imagine for a moment that we don’t know what Batman looks like. Would you imagine him as a human-sized bat with a human body and leathery wings or a bat-sized human with a furry midsection who’s basically blind and screeches if you touch him? Or maybe some other version of a bat and a human merger?
Anyway, we think it would’ve been way more awesome if he had at least one quality of a bat instead of being just the coolest crime-fighting vigilante to be born in a comic book ever. Now, we only have a myriad of Batman jokes to explore the possibilities and poke some innocent fun at everyone’s beloved hero.
Okay, so if you got lost in the last paragraph (we did try to divert your attention to Batman’s looks instead of cool jokes), this article is dedicated to jokes about Batman, Batman puns, and nothing else. And boy, are they good!
The dude’s been with us since 1939 (almost a centenarian now!). Over the years, he has accumulated a significant amount of lore—from funny jokes to fan fiction to hundreds of comics and a notable number of movies. But that’s all well and fine with us—the more, the merrier, and the more ideas for funny Batman memes. Oh, and let’s not forget to mention the section on Joker jokes—there’s no Batman without him, really, is there?
Hilarious Batman Puns to Pass the Dark (K)Nights
Ready to check out our vast selection of Batman puns and jokes? If so, then scroll down below because that’s where all the entertainment starts. Once you are there, give the best jokes your vote and share this article with anyone who’s into Batman, too.
#1 Not the Batman I expected
What did they call Batman when he was little?
Lil Wayne.
#2 Unexpected punchlines in famous throws
What do Putin, Batman, and Will Smith have in common?
They all attacked a comedian.
#3 Plot twist: Batman’s backup plan
What would Batman do if he wasn’t rich?
He would be Robin.
#4 When Your Cape Can’t Fix Feelings
What’s the toughest part about being Batman?
Knowing that you’ll never make your parents proud.
#5 Plot twist parenting level: Expert
“Our kid is always saying, I want to be Batman! or I wanna be Spider-Man!
So we dropped him off at the orphanage.”
#6 Even Batman’s ID Is Flawed
Batman walks into a bar… and is kicked out because his mask doesn’t cover his mouth!
#7 Coldest guest in the room
What did Batman bring to the party?
Just ice.
#8 Adulting hits different when you weren’t adopted
Why is Batman jealous of Superman?
Superman got adopted.
#9 Okay, this one’s lowkey clever
What’s the difference between Batman and a shoplifter?
Batman can go into a store without Robin.
#10 Gotham’s Favorite Pun Game
What kind of jokes does Batman like the most?
Dark humor.
#11 Plot twist, but make it Batty
“Wife: ‘Who’s the new Batman?’
Me: ‘Robert Pattinson.’
Wife: ‘So vampires do turn into bats.’”
#12 Plot twist hero
What do you call a blind batman?
Christian Braille.
#13 That’s a dark origin story, even for Gotham
Batman is so scary, even bullets are afraid to hit him. That’s why they aimed for his parents.
#14 Utility Belt: Mood Swings Only
When Batman doesn’t use his utility belt. It’s just a waist of equipment.
#15 Dark and brooding, just like him
How does Batman like his coffee?
Black. Like the night.
#16 Finally, an origin story that works
How does Batboy become Batman?
He has a Bat-Mitzvah.
#17 Awkward Family Therapy Moments
Joker to Batman: “Hey Batman, wanna hear a joke?”
Batman: “Yeah sure.”
Joker: “Ok, parental love.”
Batman: “I don’t get it..”
Joker: “Exactly.”
#18 Plot twist: We’re all Batman now
COVID is bringing everyone a little closer to being Batman. Either you are wearing a mask or your parents are dead.
#19 Where’s My Conditioner, Gordon?
Since they have Batman shampoo. Why do we not have Conditioner Gordon?
#20 Time’s Up for Batman Forever
I emailed Netflix and asked if they had Batman Forever. They said, ‘No, just until the end of June.’
#21 Plot twist: Batman’s South African roots
You might think Batman was born in Gotham, but he was actually born in South Africa. Capetown, to be exact.
#22 Accidental Target Practice
Why does Batman only wear dark colors? Easy. Batman doesn’t want to get shot. Why does Robin only wear bright colors? Easy. Batman doesn’t want to get shot.
#23 Batman’s not just hiding, Metropolis is just clueless
Why does Batman wear a mask?
Because the citizens of Gotham aren’t morons, like those idiots over in Metropolis
#24 Plot twist: childhood trauma unlocked
“I always wanted to be Batman when I grew up. Not for the gadgets or the money. I just hate my parents.”
#25 Batman, but Make It Personal
My girlfriend said I’m starting to annoy her because I relate everything to Batman. What a Joker.
#26 Batteries? Sounds electric!
Batman: “Alfred, why is the batremote for the batTV is not working?”
Alfred: “Have you changed the batteries, sir?”
Batman: “What are eries?”
#27 Dark Knight’s Day Off
Why does Batman’s Calendar only have 363 days? Because there is no Mother’s or Father’s day.
#28 That’s one way to judge glow-up levels
A girl asked me today if she is wearing too much make-up. I told her my reply depends on whether or not she intends to kill Batman.
#29 This Chemistry Just Got Supercharged
Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar… Followed by Batman.
#30 Well, that escalated costume-ly
“I got banned from donating clothes to the local orphanage. Apparently, they don’t appreciate Batman costumes…”
#31 Gotham’s Cheapest Joke Ever
What did batman get when he was at the store?
He GotHam.
#32 Plot twist: love’s a little messy
Batman: *buys Catwoman a drink*.
Catwoman: *slowly knocks it off of the table*.
#33 Heroics with a side of ouch
What do you call it when Batman gets hurt?
Bruised Wayne.
#34 Power outage, billionaire style
What is it called when Bruce Wayne forgets to pay the electric bill?
A dark night.
#35 Wayne Too Funny to Ignore
Why did Alfred open his umbrella at Batman’s family reunion?
Because it was a Wayne-y day.
#36 Plot twist nobody asked for
Joker asks Batman whats the worst part of going to the opera. When your parents die at the end.
#37 Plot twist: Batman’s not invited
Teenaged son: “Dad I want to have a Batman party with my friends.”
Dad: “Aren’t you a bit old for a theme party?”
Teenaged son: “No. The theme is, No Parents.”
#38 Classic Batman: Always the clingy guest
Why is it annoying to invite Batman to a party?
Because he keeps hanging around even when it is time to go.
#39 Not your average Batman snack
What’s Batman’s favorite fruit?
Ba na na na na na na na na na na na na na grapefruit.
#40 Honestly, Same Energy
A man goes in for a job application… And the interviewer asks, “What would you consider to be your main strengths and weaknesses?” “Well,” he began, “my main weakness would definitely be my issues with reality-telling what’s real from what’s not.” “Okay,” said the interviewer, “and what about your strengths?” “I’m Batman.”
#41 Classic Batman energy
What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car?
Robin, get in the car.
#42 Plot twist: Parents always win
Co-worker asked me, ‘If Batman, who is a regular human but with gadgets, teamed up with Superman, who has supernatural powers, and they fought against Iron Man, another regular human with gadgets, who teamed up with Thor, who has superpowers, who would be the winners?’ ‘Your parents when you move out.’
#43 Not All Heroes Wear Capes, Some Wear Snouts
Why would a pig dressed in black never get bullied?
Because Batman swore to protect Goth Ham.
#44 PG: Pretty Grim for Batman
Why couldn’t Batman go to the movie?
Because it was rated ‘PG’.
#45 Just wait for the punchline
What’s Batman’s favorite part of a joke?
The “PUNCH” line.
#46 When heroes go fruity
What’s Batman’s favorite drink?
Fruit punch.
#47 Plot Twist: Robin’s Really Hooked
Why did Batman and Robin quit going fishing together?
Because Robin ate all the worms.
#48 Dark Mode: Superhero Energy
How many caped crusaders does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They like it dark.
#49 Why Batman Really Wanted to Eat Out
Batman bought a French restaurant and named it: “The Creped Crusader.”
#50 Bat-Signal for Pineapple Fans
Why does Batman like Hawaiian pizza?
Because it Got-ham.
#51 Plot twist: Joker’s here too
Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Batman! Batman who? Batman’s archenemy The Joker!
#52 Classic dad joke energy
What did Batman say to the Joker when he finally caught him?
Gotham.
#53 Well, that escalated quickly
My boss told me to ‘dress for the job you want, not the job you have.’ Now I’m in a disciplinary meeting dressed as Batman.
#54 Auto-correct strikes again
Auto-correct walks into a bar… And batman says, ‘why the log fence?’
#55 When you level up from dinner to Gotham
My girlfriend and I went on our 9th date to see the new Batman film. Our dates can be summarized as followed: “Dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, BATMAN.”
#56 Clearly, Robin Needs a Crash Course
Robin: “The batmobile won’t start.”
Batman: “Check the battery.”
Robin: “What’s a Ery.”
#57 Classic Batman Logic
When Batman is investigating a crime, the most likely explanation is that the Joker did it. That’s Arkham’s Razor.
#58 Guess Bat-Signal Isn’t Lifeguard Approved
Batman walks into a superhero-only pool, he is quickly stopped by a guard, and the guard points to a sign that says. “No swimming without supervision.”
#59 Dark Knight, No Super Sight
Why doesn’t Batman have a super vision?
Because his parents died.
#60 Bath time, Gotham style
Where does Batman’s goldfish live?
In the Bat tub.
#61 Plot twist in every sip
What tea does Batman drink?
Vigilan-tea.
#62 Pun absolutely intended
What’s the difference between a newly married Danish couple and Batman’s parents?
One couple is wed Danes and the other is Dead Waynes.
#63 Nighttime Legends Only
Batman and a set of false teeth have a lot in common; they both only come out at night.
#64 Dark Knight’s Chess Code
Batman refuses to use the white pieces when he plays chess; he always has to be the Dark Knight.
#65 Guess Batman’s not into risky strolls
Why doesn’t Batman like going for walks in nature?
He’s worried about coming across poison ivy.
#66 Pun game: nailed it
What do you call it when Batman is crossed with a tree?
Spruce Wayne.
#67 Okay, That’s a Solid Pun
Why was Bruce Wayne so popular on the cricket team?
Because he was the best ever bat man.
#68 Plant dad problems, but make it heroic
How does Batman take care of Poison Ivy?
Ointment.
#69 This Joke’s Actually Criminal
Why did Batman take a break from fighting crime?
Because it was becoming the Bane of his existence!
#70 He’s Already Dad Jokin’
Riffing on the young Bruce Wayne’s lines in “Gotham:” “He has to tell his own dad jokes.”
#71 So THAT’S where I blacked out
After a rough night of partying, how can you tell you were rescued by Batman?
The next morning, you wake up in a cave.
#72 Close Enough, Honestly
“My friend said, ‘Do you want to hear an excellent Batman impression!?’ I said, ‘Go on, then.’ He shouted, ‘NOT THE KRYPTONITE!’ I said, ‘That’s Superman.’ He said, ‘Thanks man, I’ve been practicing a lot.’”
#73 That Pun Actually Slapped
What’s it called when Batman ditches church?
Christian bail.
#74 Plot twist nobody saw coming
A drunk stumbles out of the bar at 7 am… As he walks home, he sees a nun walking toward him. He stares her down the entire time as they get closer and closer. As they are about to pass, he punches her right in the face, knocking her out cold, then stands over her body and yells, “Not so tough today, are ya, Batman?”.
#75 This Joke Rolled Right In
What do you call Batman and Robin after they’ve been run over by a steamroller?
Flatman and Ribbon!
#76 Saving the day, one profile pic at a time
“‘Batman, we need your help in Paris immediately.’
‘Worry not, Commissioner, I’ve already changed my Facebook profile picture.’”
#77 Classic Bat Logic
Why did Batman rush to the Bat Cave?
He had to go to the Bat Room.
#78 Bat-ception Levels: Unlocked
One day Bruce Wayne learned that his great great great great great great grandmother encountered a vigilante who called himself “The Man of Bats…” It was his Nana’s Nana’s Nana’s Nana’s Batman.
#79 Prime Time Hero Energy
The Justice League has a vacancy and the number 7 is interviewing to fill a superhero position…
Batman: “Thank you for coming, 7. It’s been rough since the Flash took off and we’re having a hard time finding someone to replace him. Let’s get right to it. What is your first power?”
Number 7: “Well, for my whole life I’ve been in prime condition and I don’t anticipate that changing anytime soon.”
#80 Crossovers with a side of cringe
How do you get Batman into the Marvel Universe?
Hang him on the wall. Now he’s a Bruce Banner.
#81 Bathroom mysteries solved
Robin: “Where are you, Batman?”
Batman: “On my way, was in the bathroom.”
Robin: “What’s a Hroom?”
#82 Batman’s Bathtub Crisis
Batman: “It’s been a long day. Alfred, please fill up the bathtub.”
Alfred: “Master Bruce, what’s a Htub?”
#83 Plot twist: Masked dates aren’t for everyone
Why did the anti-vaxer refuse to go out with Batman?
She was against masked-man dates.
#84 Neighborhood drama hits different
Why doesn’t Batman like going to Robin’s house? They don’t like rich people in Robin’s hood.
#85 Okay, that hit different
What’s Batman’s favorite Chinese dish?
Kung POW chicken.
#86 Role reversal vibes
What position did Bruce Wayne play on his baseball team?
He was the bat boy.
#87 The Ultimate Card Cheat Code
What does Batman do when he’s losing at cards?
He uses his Joker.
#88 That Date Didn’t Stand a Chance
Why did Bruce Wayne’s date go badly?
He had bat breath.
#89 Batman’s new side hustle
Did you hear about Batman climbing up the tree? He was trying to see if he could find Robin’s nest.
#90 This Dark Knight’s Got No Chill
Why is Batman always serious?
Because he isn’t the Joker!
#91 Frosty Feuds and Chilly Takes
Why doesn’t Batman like Mr. Freeze?
He always gives him the cold shoulder.
#92 Powering up, the Wayne way
Where does Bruce Wayne get all his energy from?
Bat-teries.
#93 I see what you did there
What is Bruce Wayne’s favorite food to make for lunch?
He tells me it’s alpha-bat-ti spaghetti.
#94 Goodest Welcome Pun Ever
What did Batman’s friend say to him when he returned from holiday?
Welcome bat.
#95 When Dad Jokes Fight Crime
Have you heard of Batman’s brother, High-Hatman?
He’s a cymbal of justice.
#96 Goals? He’s already on them.
Batman doesn’t make New Year’s Resolutions. He enforces them.
#97 Best pun your bread’s ever made
What did the loaf of bread say to Batman?
“Rye so serious?”
#98 Dad jokes level: Expert
Why did Mrs. Batman name their son Gotham?
Because Batman always answers “Gotham needs you.”
#99 Sidekick Goals Achieved
What do you get for a Batman who has everything?
Bat friends.
#100 Batting cages? More like Bat-cages!
Why is Batman so good at hitting home runs?
He has a batting cage.
#101 Plot twists no one saw coming
What’s the difference between Batman and Donald Trump’s tax?
People saw Batman Returns.
#102 Dual personalities, single defeat
Why can’t Two-Face beat Batman?
Because he’s two Dents.
#103 Gotham’s Coverage Plan
What are Batman’s insurance policies called?
Dark Knight Returns.
#104 Batman’s never not coming back
What did Hollywood say when they made another Batman movie?
Done another-nother-nother-done-another-nother-nother…Batman!
#105 Overachiever’s Password Goals
Why did the blonde make her password “BatmanRobinBatgirlJokerHarelyIvyOslo”?
Because the rules said it needed to contain at least 6 characters and include at least 1 capital!
#106 Sneezing with superhero style
What did Robin say when he was about to sneeze?
Holy Keenex, Batman!
#107 Classic Halloween Plot Twist
Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Batman!
Batman who?
Batman is here to robin you of your Halloween candy!
#108 Criminals Know Batman’s Off-Duty Zone
Why did the Penguin get away with robbing the Gotham City Central Bank?
Because Batman doesn’t go downtown.
#109 When Batman actually has boundaries
What is the difference between Gotham and the world?
In Gotham the bat never killed anyone.
#110 Sparkle by Day, Bat by Night
Do you know how Gotham citizens are going to be able to tell Bruce Wayne is Batman in the upcoming movie?
Because during the day he’ll sparkle.
#111 Classic Bat-flop energy
What does Batman say when he fails his mission?
Gotham it.
#112 This Bat’s got perfect timing
Why is Batman the first to arrive at the scene of the crime?
He likes being at the BATtlefront.
#113 Sending mixed signals, much?
Why did Commissioner Gordon fail with his date?
He was sending bat signals.
#114 Fiction: My Emotional Getaway Plan
People often use fiction to escape into the lives of people who don’t have to deal with the same problems as them. For instance, whenever my parents are fighting, I like to read Batman comics.
#115 Batmarket swings missed this one
Who’s the better businessman: Superman or Batman?
It’s Superman of course, or have you ever heard about a batmarket?
#116 Dark Knight’s photography fail
Why did Batman take more photographs? Because he’d forgotten to use the Flash the first time.
#117 So that’s why he’s always flipping out
What type of exercise does Batman always want to do?
Aero-batics.
#118 Leveled Up Friendship Test
My friend said I’m starting to annoy her because I relate everything to Batman. What a joker.
#119 Plot twist: Wayne’s late again
What did Batman’s friends say when he ditched them?
Christian Bailed.
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