Parenting is a full-time job, and everyone knows that to work well, one needs to find and use a variety of tricks. A clever worker knows to learn from others, since experience is good, but can take a lot of time.
So It’s no surprise that some forward-thinking internet users seek out others’ advice on how to get the most out of parenting. Netizens share the tips and tricks that helped them but be warned, these tidbits of advice are more clever, cunning, and unethical than cuddly. Be sure to upvote your favorites and comment your own suggestions below.
#1
Ensure your kids won’t bother you by telling them to wake you up in an hour so we can start cleaning the house – they will do anything to avoid waking you
Image source: firesofpompeii, Andrea Piacquadio
#2
Tell your kid that they snore in their sleep really often, that way you’ll know if they’re pretending to sleep because they’ll fake snore
Image source: fig-lebowski, Tatiana Syrikova
#3
Play a game with your kids “Cop Cars” while traveling. Whoever spots the most cop cars from the start to end of the trip wins!
Great way to keep the kids occupied while also having an extra couple set of eyes looking out for cop cars you might not have noticed
Image source: ironbattery, Matthis Volquardsen
#4
Going somewhere with your kids that doesn’t allow outside food. Pack sandwiches and chips anyway. When questioned at the entrance, just say these items (bread, chs, meat, etc.) are approved for your child’s “restricted diet”.
Just did this recently with my son twice this week at my local water park. Saved me about 40 dollars in 2 all day trips. Just make the food reasonably healthy of course
Image source: matthewsforprez, Karolina Grabowska
#5
Parents of young kids – Keep a stash of dead batteries with your good batteries. 1) Annoying toy. 2) Batteries go dead. 3) Replace batteries in front of kid from stash. 4) Aww, sorry honey, I just replaced the batteries but I guess it just doesn’t work anymore. 5) Is that wrong?
Image source: cat_blep, mohamed abdelghaffar
#6
Hate your siblings? Buy their kids the loudest most obnoxious toys possible.
Image source: yeskushnercan, Markus Spiske
#7
If you have a newborn baby, try to teach it to say the other parent’s name first (e.g. “Dada”, “Mama”) then whenever the child is upset or needs something they will call for your partner not you, saving you a lot of hassle, especially at night.
…as a bonus you’ll probably seem very altruistic for teaching your child your partner’s name instead of your own as many people want their name to be baby’s “first word” and actively try to teach it theirs first.
Image source: MagicBez, Andrea Piacquadio
#8
Want your kids to become good liars? Overreact about every little thing they do growing up.
Image source: Macluawn, Monstera
#9
When your children are young, tell them that when they lie a vein pops up in the middle of their forehead. When they are lying to you, they will subconsciously cover their forehead with their hand and you will instantly be aware of their dishonesty!
Image source: superchet, Anna Shvets
#10
Concerned about unvaccinated children spreading infection? Start rumours amongst antivaxxers that exposure to vaccinated children can cause their unvaccinated children to develop autism….the antivaxxers will be sure to keep their children at a safe distance.
Image source: growleroz
#11
Occupy small children for hours by hiding four sweets in their bedroom and telling them you have hidden five.
Image source: andybuxx
#12
How to stop kids from ding dong ditching? Install motion controller sprinklers.
Image source: erin_baile, Muhammed Zahid Bulut
#13
Next year get blackout drunk before you hide the kids Easter eggs. Finding them the next day will be fun for you too since you won’t remember where they are.
Image source: mewantcookie83, Susanne Jutzeler, suju-foto
#14
Prepare your kids for social media by putting their artwork on the fridge and writing a bunch of mean comments underneath
Image source: ttayl107, Eren Li
#15
Set your toddlers YouTubeKids videos to 0.75X speed so they’re distracted for longer.
Image source: Unotheserfreeright24, Andrea Piacquadio
#16
Wanna find out if your kids are doing drugs? Tell them you’re going on a weekend away and come back that evening.
Image source: HenryArthur21, Liza Summer
#17
Have some rowdy children who want to play? Tell them that you’re all going to play hide and seek and that you’ll be “it”. Once you finish your countdown don’t go anywhere and just enjoy your peace and quiet.
Image source: themenace117, Anastasia Shuraeva
#18
Teach your kids that the ice cream truck only plays music when it is out of ice cream. It will make your life SO much easier. Trust me.
#19
Make friends with a police officer in your city / town. If your teenagers ever get in trouble with the law, they’re more likely to be let off easy when the officer recognizes them as your child.
Image source: mood_le, Kindel Media
#20
If you decide to adopt kids, tell them that if anyone makes fun of them for being adopted, they should say “At least I was wanted. You were probably a mistake and your parents didn’t have the heart to tell you.”.
Image source: anon, Josh Willink
#21
Acquire a taste for spicy food and you most likely won’t have to share with your kids.
Image source: NinjaBonsai
#22
If you are a parent, use your child’s library card when checking books out of the library. Not only can you check out any book (adult or children’s), but there is no fee if you return them late.
Image source: TheIntrovertedAuthor, Abby Chung
#23
Chuck E Cheese has timed cards as well as points, but the trick is that you can swipe the timed cards every 10-15 secs, So Instead of having to buy 4 cards for my kids, I just buy 1 timed card for them to all share & it works out perfectly, spent 2 hours having a ball with 2 60 min cards.
Image source: Broken_Spirit74
#24
Tell your kid that if he or she doesn’t brush their teeth well enough, they’ll all fall out. When they start to lose their baby teeth, tell them they didn’t do a good enough job. This way, they’ll brush their adult teeth really well.
Image source: CougarDave7309, Ketut Subiyanto
#25
As a parent of a baby, smell their diaper. If you DON’T smell poop, say, “Woah, somebody has a poopy diaper. “ Then take them to the other room and pretend to change them. Then the next time they poop tell your spouse, “It’s your turn. I changed them last time.”
Image source: existentialzebra, RDNE Stock project
#26
When picking pumpkins this year, secretly buy them beforehand at Aldi’s where it’s significant cheaper and put them in the trunk. Then, take the kids to the pumpkin patch and have them pick out their pumpkin and tell them the workers will put them in the trunk for them.
Image source: crazypancakes, Nathan J Hilton
#27
Is your child waiting on a package? When you receive it, hide it before they see it. Every day they will offer to get the mail for you until it “arrives”.
Image source: leafninjadog, Polina Tankilevitch
#28
If you hold up your phone at the right angle during present unwrapping you can browse reddit while making it look like your taking family photos
Image source: OneBigBrownDog, cottonbro studio
#29
Tell your kids that every time they lie or break a promise, they permanently lose a strand of hair on their head, and that if they lie too much, they will go bald at a very young age. Works like a charm!
Note: Avoid if you are bald, and also make them promise to keep it a secret at least till they turn 15 or something. Believe me, you don’t want them going to a relative and be like “I see that you lie a lot” “No I don’t, who told you that?” “LIAR LIAR!!! My mum told me!”
You can also add that they earn a strand everytime they help you, do a good deed or something…
Image source: varungupta3009, Kampus Production
#30
Kid doesn’t want to eat something? Send them to a friends house to hangout, and give/tell the parents to cook the food your kid doesn’t like! He will be forced to eat it, or be super embarrassing to a friend’s family.
Image source: AdrianeXUS, cottonbro studio
Follow Us
