The Real Housewives of Atlanta 5.03 Recap – Porsha Vs. Kenya: Round 1

Last night’s episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta was the usual flair for the Georgia Peaches of Atlanta, but Kenya Moore managed to ruin the light atmosphere again with her increasingly unnecessary Diva Dreadful attitude that just leaves a bad taste in my stomach, along with my head and ears. So what did the demonic former Miss USA do this time? Read on for the ghastly details.

Porsha vs. Kenya: Round 1

Well The Real Housewives of Atlanta debunked my theory of Porsha Stewart being Kim Zolciak-Biermann’s replacement by introducing the debutante on tonight’s episode instead of later in the season. Porsha gave us her history, which included being the granddaughter of civil rights leader Hosea Williams and the wife of former NFL star Cordell Stewart. Kenya also talked about being a part of her grandfather’s charity that raises money for underprivileged youth and their families. Porsha kind of came off as a bit ditzy in her introduction to the masses, sort of like a black version of Gretchen Rossi or an extremely tamer Brandi Glanville (if there is such a thing). However, Porsha is most definitely happy with her life, which is something a certain demented ATL Housewife can’t claim to be, no matter how much she puts on for the cameras.

But again, Bravo paired the unsuspecting Porsha with Kenya, who didn’t waste time eating the poor girl alive after she mistakenly referred to Kenya as “Miss America” instead of “Miss USA” at Porsha’s Hosea Williams Foundation charity event. Although, Kenya was already a bit miffed about Porsha after their first introduction at lunch, where Porsha managed to make Kenya unsettled by asking her personal questions about marriage and children, two things Kenya is on the prowl for, but can’t get. So would it be far-fetched to say Kenya was a bit jealous of Porsha and couldn’t wait for the opportunity to attack her fellow newbie? Not in the least.

So let’s get back to the way Kenya acted/reacted throughout the event. First of all, Porsha made it clear on how the event would be a women’s only gala. Despite Cordell Stewart crashing the event to drop off a hefty donation for the charity, Porsha still “kicked him out” to maintain the status quo. Meanwhile, Kenya was dead set on bringing Miss Lawrence to the gala, despite already bringing one female friend with her (whose name happened to be ‘Kanya.’ I’m not making this up.) So, Kenya was already set on bringing drama to Porsha’s event for no reason whatsoever, which goes to show that the woman lives and breathes on being the center of attention, no matter whose event she’s attending.

Secondly, Kenya was very disrespectful of Porsha’s event not being as ‘star-studded’ as she thought it would be. Who did she expect would show up? Oprah Winfrey? Will Smith? Or better yet, did she really think she’s on their level? Sadness all around…

Finally, Kenya had the audacity to compare the general knowledge of her Miss USA title to Michelle Obama being the First Lady of the United States, as if kids in school are being quizzed on every Miss USA winner to have ever held the crown. This was when I knew Kenya was completely delusional, and I’m not being even remotely funny about that assessment either, especially after Kenya’s conversation with Phaedra about her mother having mental issues. Maybe Kenya’s mental abuse from her mother (who tried to give her away for adoption) and horrid upbringing is the catalyst to her present behavior, which is just as atrocious and asinine as her mother’s. Just a thought.

In the end, Porsha handled Kenya’s rude exit as graciously as one possibly could do without snatching a knot in her ass. For that, I will give her a “Bravo” clap for effort. On the other hand, I’m going to need her to come harder when she goes toe-to-toe with Kenya again.

Other Moments of the Night

– NeNe and Cynthia’s adventure in New York City was pretty hilarious, but I could have sworn that New Yorkers would be used to celebrities and cameras since a lot of movies and TV shows film there nonstop. However, it was nice to see NeNe be recognized by her Glee character and not being a Real Housewife. NeNe has truly arrived.

– And speaking of NeNe arriving, when will she finally let Gregg back into her heart? We all know it will happen soon, but seriously, NeNe, throw that man a bone so he will stop throwing sap all over my TV screen with those rhymes and old school pick up lines?

– Phaedra and Apollo are doing a donkey butt exercise video. Hmm… No comment. But I will comment on Phaedra getting buddy-buddy with Kenya. Hasn’t she not learned her lesson from getting friendly with Sheree last year?

– Kandi’s uncle talking about roots and herbs to help with erectile dysfunction took me right back to The Real Housewives of New York City‘s Aviva Drescher’s father George, who was the oldest horndog I have ever seen. I know old people are still humans and have to get their rocks off too, but come on…

– Kim still sat around her house and whined about moving in this episode, yet not one box was packed. Although, her declaration of taking the flowers she planted on the property with her was actually a sound decision that I could stand behind.

So what was your thoughts on tonight’s The Real Housewives of Atlanta? Did you like Porsha? Was Kenya right to get offended? Let us know below.

Photo Credit: Bravo/Alex Martinez

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