Teachers are there for you during one of the most important parts of your life: childhood. They see the way you change, what you grow up to be like, and then send you off to live your life. The next time teachers see their students is probably during reunions, where the kids are now adults with jobs and maybe even families of their own.
This Reddit user decided to ask teachers that go to reunions a lot to share what changes people usually go through and whether there are any common patterns or maybe even some sad decline stories they have to share, and it made for a very interesting online thread. So keep on scrolling to read some of the best answers we gathered.
What kind of changes did you notice after finishing high school or university? If you have any interesting stories to share, you can do so in the comment section below!
#1
I know that this is a reach-out to teachers but I want to do a shout-out to a teacher.
I attended only my 20th year reunion in 1999, and only because I had to return home to my family because my step-mother was dying. I had left town the day after graduation and never looked back.
A math teacher who taught calculus and coached football was so amazing in our school and our community that the whole town had created a day devoted to him and named it “Garvin Day.” He was retiring that year.
He was a man of quiet intensity. I remember his catching me and some friends smoking in the boiler room and he looked at each of us intently. “I don’t think that’s very smart to smoke in here. I’d have thought y’all were smarter than this.”
It was a Catholic college prep school with very strict rules that had any other teacher caught us, we would have been expelled.
Coach Garvin had such patience in his ways, and he worked every angle to get us to understand math. He listened and when he spoke, he spoke to each one of us.
So on the day I roll up to the school, there was a line the whole length of the football field to say hey to Coach Garvin. I couldn’t wait to see him although I doubted he’d remember little ole me after 20 years!
It took me almost an hour to hear him speak my name, as he had spoken each other name of every one of us in that line I imagine.
“How have you been? What have you been doing? You still smoking?”
Image source: figiveup, Yan Krukov
#2
I missed my 10 years reunion but I went to 15 years.
As some said, most people came to impress others. I don‘t care, I was there to see a guy I was friends with in school. He was a very intelligent dude, but clearly had a problem with authorities. When we got older, he worked as a chemist and also liked drugs. Back in the days, we used to smoke pot regularly but he found other friends and things for worse. Like cooking-meth-and-get-your-door kicked-in-weekly-by-cops-or-russians-worse.
Last thing I heard, he wenn to jail for a couple of years.
When I met him at the reunion, he was also happy to see me. We talked almost the whole evening, it was great. What I liked the most, he found a wife when he got out of jail, she supported him to get rid of an heroin-addiction he „got“ in jail and he‘s a proud father of two kids. Nice transformation.
Image source: anon, Ketut Subiyanto
#3
My grandpa invited his English teacher from high school to their 60th HS reunion. She was 97 at the time (101 now) and is sharp as a tack. She had a wonderful time seeing everyone and even remembered a good portion of her students, but did mention that it was disheartening to see students of hers who have died or are suffering from dementia.
Image source: Thunda792, Kampus Production
#4
I’ll share an uplifting one. Not a teacher, btw. It was at my classes’ ten-year reunion.
One of the people who showed up was, well, to put it bluntly, I had never thought much of them when graduation happened. They just kind of coasted through, had been a bully when they were younger, definitely didn’t take class seriously (not that I ever saw) etc.
They didn’t go on to be a CEO or something. Anyone can do that. No, instead they got married, found responsibility, and now had several kids. They were raising a family and trying to be a good parent and spouse. They’d found work they enjoyed and that paid well so they could support that family with a good life.
And then? They went up to people at that reunion who they recalled setting an example or giving them a template to build on and thanked them for it. Which is … It left me dumbstruck. That takes humility and strength.
That is an epic transformation. From just someone who was there probably because they had to be to someone who’d found their being. I was really glad to hear they were doing so well, and see how much they’d changed.
I don’t ever expect to come back at the 20 and see them running some giant company or anything. But I expect I’ll respect them just as highly (probably a bit more, honestly).
Image source: vikingzx, Nicole Michalou
#5
Huh, this year would be my 20th anniversary.
I can’t think of anything I’d rather do less, than see all those people. There are exactly 2 of them I’d like to see again.
Image source: EvidentlyEmpirical, Karolina Grabowska
#6
Not a teacher but there was a really remarkable transformation in mine.
There was a kid in my high school who was, for lack of a better term, a huge f**k up. Lots of drugs, really overweight, constantly getting suspended, getting in fights, trouble with the law, etc.
So I show up to my 10 year reunion, And there is this guy there that nobody recognizes. Tall, long hair, muscular, pretty good looking. It’s the same guy. Literally none of us could picture him so he had to show us old photos on his phone. He told me that after high school he got a job cleaning pools, which “saved his life” according to him. It was really tough work which got him in shape, and helped him kick drugs and gave him a purpose. Eventually he started his own pool cleaning business and has since expanded it enough that he makes fantastic money and doesn’t even work 40 hours a week, and it’s still growing.
It sounded like he had some demons to work through, but he literally went from being somebody we all kinda expected to spend his life in jail, to arguably being the best looking guy at the reunion, making more money than almost anyone there, and just having a huge turnaround. Probably the biggest talk of the night, and honestly, I think everyone was really impressed. I know I was. He deserved all the kudos he got.
Image source: livious1, Ehavuz Market
#7
Half my grade didn’t event get invited to our 10 year. Seems just like the popular kids just invited themselves
Image source: ljc12, RODNAE Productions
#8
I was one of the valedictorians and got voted most likely to become president, I dated the same guy most of the way through high school and married him in college.
10 years down the way, I was divorced and on disability for mental illness. I was actually afraid to go to the reunion because things were TOTALLY different. I don’t know why, but I seriously thought people would think bad of me for getting a divorce.
Our school did something interesting for the reunion. One part was a formal sit down dinner that cost something like $80. But another part was a free BBQ down at the local park. I went to the freebie. Everyone was pretty casual. Very few of the former popular crowd came – guess they just wanted to show off at the formal dinner.
Lots of other people there had been honors students and had also gotten a harsh smack in the face by life. Lots of the valedictorians and honors students failed out of college by sophomore year. I know a couple of them had gone through rehab. I was surprised to find I wasn’t the only one who was mentally ill – we’d all apparently been REALLY good at hiding it in high school.
A lot of people got into fields no one would have pegged them for. The shyest girl worked as a pharma rep, scrawny dorky kid was now absolutely ripped and in the military. I’d been known as a writer and journalist, but I know several people were surprised to hear I’d primarily worked as a computer tech.
So I’d worked myself up for nothing. I was glad I went. I’m guessing the school didn’t bother to do anything for 20th or 25th, or maybe the former popular kids decided having a free event again was gauche.
Image source: Ravenamore, Thirdman
#9
My dad came to the US when he was ten and didn’t speak a word of English. Ended up being class valedictorian and winning all twelve of the school’s academic prizes, getting a full ride to Harvard, and becoming a professor. At his 50th high school reunion, a woman came up to my mom and angrily said “Everyone always talks about how your husband won all twelve prizes. But that’s not true! My husband won one of them!”
Obviously, some hurts never go away.
Image source: Notmyrealname, Kindel Media
#10
All I know is I got super drunk with my favorite teacher at our 5-year reunion. She’s amazing. She’s a romance writer, not above a stupid prank, and a ton of fun. It’s not the only time we got drunk together. Seeing different a side to teachers is interesting as an adult.
Image source: SourMelissa, Maurício Mascaro
#11
Facebook ruined class reunions for me. So I quit Facebook. It was like a class reunion every f*****g day
Image source: AdministrativeElk6, Pixabay
#12
10yr – trying to impress with wife a kid and fancy job
20yr – 2nd wife 2nd round of kids, same or similar job
30yr – trying to not be the largest person there
40yr – just trying to outlive the other people
Those that leap frog in a career – or are considered “Lucky” in life – rarely go to HS reunions. HS reunions are ridiculously full of drama and gossip.
Image source: plogsdon83, Anna Shvets
#13
Not a teacher.
Didn’t get invited to my 5 year or my 10 year (actually happening in two months), I got arrested for doing something real stupid my freshman year of college, spent a year in jail and 3 more on probation, and then when I reached out to the alumni organizing the 5 year they told me I would not be allowed into the event if I showed up. When I asked why they said “its just best if you don’t come”. The few friends I still had from high school tried to convince the organizers otherwise, but by then I had said I didn’t want to go anyway so they let it drop.
I totally lied. I wish with all my heart that I could go and it’s one of the worst feelings I ever felt being told that I couldn’t.
Image source: itsathrowaway2300, Andrew Neel
#14
My brother in law went to an unofficial 7 year reunion. People kept getting in fights over stuff that happened in high school, he hasn’t bothered going to another one.
I would’t mind going to one, but I’m not going to travel literally from one coast to another just to see people who haven’t been part of my life for over 30 years.
Image source: verminiusrex, Liza Summer
#15
We just had our 20 y reunion a few months ago and it was honestly great. Most people showed up, plus a few of the teachers. We‘ve always been a relative unpretentious bunch with everyone somewhat getting along. And it was still sort of like that. We all sort of clicked right away. And we basically had no unexpected transformations, neither positive nor negative. The ones who were expected to pick up a high rolling career did and the ones expected to surf along in the middleclass did as well. The were a few outliers (like the cool skateboarding bloke who wasn’t really good in school was now a medical doctor with family and kids). But all in all, it had all turned out more or less as expected. On paper that sounds horrifically boring. But in reality it was incredibly nice to see everyone had made something of themselves and you‘d still get along, even after 20 years.
Image source: The_Sceptic_Lemur, Bruna Gabrielle Félix
#16
So not a teacher. Just giving my story of my 10 year reunion from 2 years ago.
One girl in high school had uncut hair to the floor, jean skirts, some religious thing. Her dad was an a*****e, and his girl friend wore tight shirts and short skirts with spray on tan and cheap blonde hair dye. Absolute definition of hypocritical a*****e parents. The son/brother was treated like a king and had absolutely no parenting – all while the girl and her two sisters were taught to do all the chores and take care of the dad/girlfriend/brother. She grew up to be a religious nutjob that went further down that rabbit hole and believe that blowing up abortion clinics is totally cool. She hasn’t done it yet, but she’s rather vocal about it. She sat next to everyone at some point in the reunion and tried to figure out what political affiliation everyone was to start fights.
One guy that never took anything seriously went to some branch of the military and got his life together. He’s a car mechanic now and is a much nicer guy.
And then me… I was a quiet nerd girl and still am. Except I came in to the parklot on my motorcycle (which I had for a while but didn’t think was a big deal) and everyone thought it was a huge deal that nerdy me rode motorcycles now. I have a cheap one and it wasn’t hard to learn. Apparently being able to hold normal conversations (which I could do before) and riding a motorcycle was a “huge transformation”. I think everyone thought I was somehow shy or weird when I was just quiet and didn’t want to talk to them when I was a teenager. So having polite conversation from me blew their minds.
Image source: CoronaFunTime, Karolina Grabowska
#17
My first two years there was a kid who was very troubled. Complete disruption, immature, defiant. He was caught selling Xanax, was almost put up for expulsion and graduated after doing just enough independent study work…
A few years later he showed up to the reunion a completely different person. Tall, in shape, confident, well-spoken and he had just passed his exam to become an x-ray technician. He had very normal conversations with staff members and I about budgeting so he could save up for a nicer house and other appropriate topics. If you’d have known this kid when he was in his teens never in a billion years would you have thought you’d have that kind of conversation with him. Very proud of him.
Image source: LizardsThicket
#18
Since I was still in school, I couldn’t wait to attend my reunions; I imagined we’re all finally our fully developed selves, over the pettiness and cliques, able to converse as adults.
I flew across the country to attend my 10th reunion. It was small, and awkward, and there were a LOT of single moms with 10-year-olds. It was in our town’s local bro-pub. No one spoke to me then either.
Did not attend 20th.
#19
Our school had a 3 strike rule
Even to drugs. I was the supply teacher that people liked and talked to, I helped a kid when his parents were on drugs, it turned out he was on drugs to. Weeks after that he just looked tired and warn out. Next time I see him he’s happy, cheerful and a great looking guy he would no longer have to keep his head down, he was no longer the weird kid that everyone stays away from
Image source: dutch-had-a-plan, Yan Krukov
#20
I like the poetic story of my moms bully who said “I would totally date you!… if you wore a bag over your head!”
Not really sure how she looked growing up but she became beautiful when she was more like 20s, then ended up being a counselor. 100$ or more per hour, making her own schedule. He ended up digging ditches.
Image source: anon
#21
So… Not a teacher and only been to one School reunion – after about 15-20 years
We got in contact via ‘friendsreunited’ (if anyone remembers that) and I was chatting with a couple of people in the weeks leading up to the reunion
I was making jokes about seeing a girl – Carol – who everyone wanted to ‘be friends’ with. Making jokes about how she was a flirt and probably had been through a couple of husbands by now, when someone informed me that she had died of cancer at age 20
Once at the reunion, I asked ‘whatever happened to Gary L’… Gary was a joker, he was friends with everyone and, somehow, able to fit in with all the different factions at school.
I was told that Good ol’ Gary was in prison, on multiple counts of Possession of CP
Image source: ArcTan_Pete, SHVETS production
#22
You wouldn’t catch me dead at one of those things, but thanks to Facebook snooping (very carefully so I don’t accidentally like photos or friend anyone) I have seen some interesting things. The prom king is still cool, the prom queen is some kind of big wig in the army and the quiet nice kid is a body builder. The popular kids are the keeping up with the Joneses types. Nothing impressive except lots of hair dye and Botox.
I hope someone snooped through mine to see that I still listen to backstreet boys and kept the two best friends I had back than. We took different paths but we’re all still the same only older and smarter.
Image source: anon
#23
My class organized the last one using Facebook to locate lost classmates. One of the girls contacted replied with a “don’t ever contact me again” response. The thing was, I got the vibe it was because she was being abused and not because she didn’t like her classmates. I went to my 20-year and it was okay. But I really don’t have an interest in going back for another. It’s like you in some ways revert your behavior to the last time you hung out together. I’ve had 4 or 5 classmates pass away over the years. Heart attack, car wreck, cancer.
Image source: vicemagnet, Carl Wycoff
#24
I went to my 40th anniversary. Class of 300 seniors, around 100 showed up. It was surprising how the cliques from high school instantly re-emerged.
At 57, I was still in good shape, had all my hair, hardly any gray. That put me in a pretty small minority of the guys. Lots of bald guys with gray hair on the sides.
Some of the hottest girls from high school were not remotely good looking any more, while some of the normal looking girls who were nice back then were still nice and were more beautiful than ever.
Some of the people would say stuff like “Oh, I’m retired now. Cashed in my stock from Blah buh dee dah.” Or, “I now just work part time for the investment firm I started thirty years ago.” A few were hoping that old connections could help them find work.
I didn’t bring my wife or kids, but a few people did. Those who did seemed like they were doing it to say “I know you thought I’d never find a girl” but realistically they were probably thinking “Whatever, I haven’t thought about you even once since high school.”
I didn’t stay too long, but it was nice to see some people. I’d go back for the 50th if I make it to 67 and haven’t moved too far away.
Image source: mPeachy
#25
My 10 year reunion had 2 different parties.
1st one hosted by the old student council was a 2 day event with 1st day being just the class and the 2nd day being family as well. Cost was to put up x amount for a hotel, food, etc.
2nd one was by the popular kids who thought the first one was stupid (I agree) and just rent out a bar and have a good time.
I went to neither because I only talk to maybe 3 people from high school and really didn’t care. Plus I’m fatter now and no one needs to see that lol.
Image source: LethalPirate
#26
Obligatory, I am not a teacher and so this is not quite on topic, it just stirs up a thought or two, personally.
I was class President, in charge of organizing reunions. Small town, small school. I didn’t see the point in a five year reunion, I told everyone in our class facebook group. A few people still banded together to do something but to my knowledge it didn’t really take form.
We approach 8 1/2 years and there’s activity on the class Facebook group, people already talking about the ten year reunion. I realize people have work and families but if the reunion were to be held in the summer the start of this conversation would be about 20 months ahead of time.
Not faulting people for being excited either. But they were frustrated. Once the discussion started these dozen or so people seemed basically panicked that they had not heard anything about it at that point. I hadn’t considered doing anything extravagant, I’d barely considered it at all honestly, and assumed 10-12 months would be ample time for those interested to make plans for a Saturday evening, and I figured it was best to poll everyone for a convenient date.
But these people didn’t waste much time before starting into some passive-aggressive s**t talk (some of it not so passive at all, come to think of it). Within 24 hrs they were already considering voting someone new to take charge, among about the dozen of them.
A few people popped in here or there to ask why they were so worked up so early, and a few others kind of came to my defense. But a number of those in that group talked about speaking to a convincing number of other classmates, many by name, and expressed that those others had concerns too.
What I assumed would be a relaxed event and simple planning process suddenly seemed like a massive pain in the a*s. No chance did I have the dedication to deliver them the event they felt they deserved.
I posted my ‘official resignation’ in the group and wished them luck. They elected the wrong guy… I never realized til then what those high school years and/or reliving them for an evening might mean to people. Since graduating high school I’ve neither been successful or a total failure, maybe that prevents me from feeling the same, one way or the other. I hate to admit this, not even sure if it’s really accurate, but I think their excitement turned me off the idea. Or maybe it was just overwhelming or intimidating.
Did what I thought was best. Did it make me secretly a little butthurt, yeah a bit I guess. But it also felt like a weight was lifted. I don’t know how the reunion went, or if they even wound up doing one. And while I legitimately liked every single one of my classmates, missing out on the possible reunion doesn’t really bother me… Kind of having my character called into question over something I hadn’t considered a huge priority, however, did rub me a little wrong.
Image source: bh1995inc
#27
I had my 10 year reunion last summer and like I predicted hardly anyone showed up. I was so jazzed to go because of all the cartoons I watched growing up as a kid talking about reunions and I showed up to this empty hall and was like, “Yep, we always keep the bar low around here.”
Image source: DrinkTeaOrDie
#28
my school has one every year for all classes, so sometimes parents and children will go together and sometimes even grandparents.
My one friend went and from what I’ve heard the only people there graduated before 95, none of the younger generations showed up save a few who were just curious to see what it is.
Its all Karens and 40 to 50-year-old men who pretend like they all graduated a few years ago. The same type of people who constantly brag about that one game where they won the season and talk about nothing else, and middle-aged suburban housewives trying to sell mlms while asking to speak to the coach of their son’s little league team to get him more time on the field.
Image source: anon, SHVETS production
#29
My 10 year happened at the bar I worked at. I never got an invite but I dropped out so I didn’t expect one. I had a bit of a drinking problem at that time and managed to get myself fired the morning of the reunion. So I didn’t crash the party like I had planned.
Image source: the_flatulence
#30
There’s a lot of comments here about the “Popular kids”, but that seems rather silly. They are a social group who communicate, and the others… aren’t. Why is there no one here saying that “all of the non popular kids threw a reunion”?
I went to my 10 year, about 50 people out of about 600 were there… and even still, I hung out ONLY with my friends who I had maintained contact with anyway.
Image source: dmlemco
Follow Us
