In honour of Alan Arkin, who played Captain Yossarian: “Live forever, or die in the attempt”. What rule was just too hard to follow?
#1
There’s a creek in northern VA, Difficult Run, that feeds into the Potomac near Great Falls. On its hiking trail there’s a sign saying not to swim in the creek. However, it’s not deep and the current is gentle, with some nice swimming holes underneath small waterfalls, so people swim anyway.
They should have read the sign more closely though, since it’s really saying: “A water treatment plant dumps into this creek just a ways up, stay out of the poo water”.
Always know what rule you’re breaking.
#2
I bite into Kit-Kats instead of breaking off individual bits.
#3
Years ago I went mini golfing with friends (in my 20s at the time). One of the posted rules was no profanity. Yeah I broke that rule on the first hole.
#4
I would TOTALLY break into any car that had an animal in it in distress or soon to be on a hot day
#5
The “no hats” policy at my school. 90% of teachers don’t care, and while it does get a bit annoying getting yelled at by random teachers i don’t know in the hallways, its usually fine. Hats are too important on an accessory for me to not wear.
#6
my parents no crying rule..
#7
well, the ban on trans people existing in texas. SORRY I WAS F****N’ BORN
#8
The apartheid rules about where white people or black people could sit, which bus they could use , which water fountain, etc. I just ignored those rules. F**k you you nazis.
#9
My mom’s rule of covering your knees and not showing your shoulders. She trusts me enough to wear shirts under crop tops/leggings under shorts/skirts but lmfao who is she joking I change in the school bathroom at LEAST 3 times a week. Sometimes all 5
#10
I’m a chronic pain patient and I refuse to give up my marijuana edibles. It is, sometimes, the only way to calm crippling spasms. It got me kicked out of two other pain clinics. Now, I’m at a place where I can use my edibles, but it’s clear that the clinic is poorly managed. I can’t seem to get balance!
#11
My parents have a rule to not date anyone exclusively until you graduate high school. Me and this girl have been dating for almost a year now. And I’m not graduated
#12
As many as I can…..as many as I can…
#13
The 5 second rule
#14
I ignore most of the health care rules–or at least advice–that regularly comes out from various experts and government agencies. A lot of the foods that were considered bad for you when I was younger are now good, and vice versa. I try to eat reasonably healthy, but I don’t see the point in trying to live forever if I can’t enjoy a good bacon cheeseburger once in a while. And nutritional guidelines have flip-flopped so many times during my lifetime, that I’m sure in a few years someone will come out with a study saying bacon actually has some health benefits.
#15
I had to break a friend’s confidence once. A work friend.
She had confided in me that her husband had become an alcoholic and was becoming aggressive/abusive. I kept that to myself and offered to be an ear, or even a safe space if she ever needed.
We got a message at work saying she was going to be off sick for a while. Then we heard her husband had passed away.
Our boss wanted to do all the supportive things one would do when someone usually loses a spouse. And all my instincts said the passing was unnatural. So I quietly pulled boss aside, explained the entire situation and to tread very carefully. I fought with it but ultimately didn’t want to cause my friend more distress due to the circumstances, and also didn’t want boss (a lovely lady) to feel awful about expressing certain sentiments due to the circumstances surrounding the loss.
I usually have my own rule, about taking confidences to the grave. But this one? I agonised and made a different call.
#16
My mom thinks that if I have social media I’ll show people pics of me and tell a bunch of people my home address and stuff. So I’m not allowed any form of social media.
So as you can tell by me making this list addition I have broken it 💀
#17
Those stupid rules about which gender gets to remove which articles of clothing when it gets hot out! All through my 20s, 30s, and into my 40s I’ve walked around shirtless in various places during the summer months. Keeping my cool. Not so much now, since going out in the sun gives me migraines. But I still think those rules are stupid.
#18
What a ‘family’ is supposed to be/monogamy. My partner lives with me and their other boyfriend, and bf and me are friends, I love hanging out and cooking or asking him to explain this or that about warhammer or math to me. My other best friend and I are also partners; and all four of us know about each other and hang out in our discord server all the time and we function as a family. Don’t let anybody tell you what ‘family’ is supposed to mean, or what ‘relationship’ is supposed to look like, take it from an old queen! Infinite variety in infinite combinations! 🖖🏼
#19
‘Look at my eyes when I’m talking to you’
‘No crying’’
I’ve broken both the most. If I look at anyone in the eyes I get the urge to laugh, and I cry when my parents are sleeping so they can’t possibly barge into my room and tell me I’m not allowed to cry
#20
I did not like reading the school reading books. We would aaaaaalways have a class discussion about how much we related to them. Which, I never did. I needed some time to plan out answers and figure out how to “appear normal” in a school full of homophobes.
We weren’t supposed to read ahead, but at one point I was just like “Fvck this, I’m gonna get this over with.”
I still do that to this day.
#21
Rule 3
(this is a reference to a webtoon. If you don’t get pls don’t downvote.)
#22
“Only seniors can leave campus for lunch.” During highschool – the student parking lot was manned during both lunch periods (we were not within walking distance of any place to eat and return within our 50-minute lunch period). So I scheduled a “study hall” directly after my lunch (basically a free period in the library where roll was almost never taken, supposed to be used for academic work) and parked in the faculty/visitor lot (unmanned). So as soon as I was old enough to drive, my girlfriend and I could escape for almost two hours to get some food and head to the nearby park to do whatever we pleased ;).
#23
My grandfather won’t let me pet my dog but I do it anways. My dog is soooo cute
#24
I don’t have a credit score because I’ve NEVER had debt. Cash or debit cards only.
#25
I can’t help but feed the birds. Hawaii had some pretty adorable pigeons and they weren’t bothered by humans at all. Every morning those birds would make their way up to the hotels in hopes of getting some crumbs. I usually fed them because their cute little faces are irresistible.🐦💜
#26
So, funny you ask. One time i was at a place (some sorta bay or smth) and there was a no climbing on the rocks rule. I thought the rule was bogus, so i went on there anyway. However, it was right next to the water so it was wet. Being my idiot self, i wasn’t careful and sliced my arm on a sharp rock.
TL;DR: a sign said not to climb rocks and i found out why
#27
The “ DonT tALk bACK To YoUr ElDErs” rule. I will respond to you with as much ✨SASS✨ as is warranted.
#28
Don’t do drugs
#29
I worked for Amazon, nuff said. So yeah, I’m gonna go vape in the toilets – Bezos can suck it!
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