Let’s be real: even dream couples have a communication breakdown from time to time. Making sure you really understand each other and stay on the same page takes the kind of work a lot of people just aren’t prepared to put in.
One woman turned to an online community to vent after her husband ignored her repeated requests to stay away from her special souvenir wines. After she discovered he’d finished the prized bottles with his friends, things got dramatic fast.
More info: Reddit
Staying on the same page as your partner takes the kind of effort that some people just aren’t willing to put in, sadly
Image credits: Wavebreak Media / Freepik (not the actual photo)
One woman asked her husband, more than once, to stay away from two bottles of wine that were especially sentimental to her
Image credits: photoroyalty / Freepik (not the actual photo)
When she went away, however, he thought it would be no big deal to tuck into her prized liquor after a pub night with his friends
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
When she got back to discover the bottles drained, she flipped out, but her husband just said he “doesn’t remember unimportant stuff” and even suggested she get counseling
Image credits: Deenosaurus02
Enraged, stunned, and disappointed beyond belief, she then turned to netizens to ask whether she was overreacting, or if she’s right to be mad at her thoughtless husband
When the original poster (OP) returned from Japan with a carefully chosen bottle of sake, it wasn’t meant to be handed out like party juice. Along with it sat an untouched German wine, another small keepsake. She made it clear to her husband that these bottles were truly special, sentimental, and strictly not for guests. Ever.
But despite her crystal-clear boundaries, her husband kept asking if he could gift the sake to family or friends. Every time she told him absolutely not. He even refused to drink it the one time she opened it, saying he had a headache. So, apart from OP taking a little sip, the cherished sake waited, definitely meant to stay right where it was.
Then OP went away for a bit but, after a pub night, her husband invited his friends over and cracked open both the souvenir sake and the untouched wine. When OP returned the next day and asked him where her prized bottles were, he casually announced that he and his mates had finished them.
When she confronted him about stomping all over her boundaries, he brushed her off, claiming he “forgot” her very explicit no, insisting he doesn’t remember “unimportant stuff.” He even said she shouldn’t “ruin their relationship” and suggested she see a counselor. Now OP’s left questioning everything, wondering if her anger is justified.
Image credits: Zaji Kanamajina / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
To be honest, her husband sounds like a bit of a jerk, right? She couldn’t have been any clearer, yet he conveniently “forgot” about her instructions the second it suited him. Couples get their wires crossed at times, sure, but this was a blatant boundary buster. So, how can spouses avoid a collapse in communication, anyway?
The experts over at Heartfelt Counseling say that, when you’re part of a committed couple, you and your partner need to work together to figure out ways to hear, validate, and understand each other. If you’re not working together as a team, you risk falling into the communication breakdown trap.
Signs your relationship is suffering from catastrophically crossed wires include disagreements that always end in a fight, interrupting each other, a loss of casual intimacy, not setting goals or making plans together, unhealthy competition, raising your voice, and playing the blame game.
Writing for VeryWellMind, Elizabeth Scott (Ph.D.) suggests a few useful ways to keep communication on track, including listening carefully (hello active listening), trying to see your partner’s point of view, responding to criticism with empathy, owning what’s yours, using “I” statements, looking for compromise, and taking a time-out if things get heated.
We’d say OP and (mostly) her husband need to have some real talk if they’re going to avoid this incident snowballing into a full-blown wrecked relationship. After all, she did draw a very clear line in the sand which he crossed without a thought.
What’s your take? Is OP overreacting, or is her husband due for a reality check he won’t be able to “forget” this time? Drop your thoughts in the comments!
In the comments, readers all seemed to agree that the woman wasn’t the jerk in the whole mess and slammed her husband for his thoughtlessness and lack of respect for her
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