Eastwick 1.01 “Pilot” Recap

This week, ABC bestowed upon us the bewitching drama Eastwick and its spell easily won me over. But you don’t want to know what I thought. You want a recap. So let’s get to it.

During a town fair that celebrated the history of Eastwick, we met our three heroines: Roxie Torcoleti, a sexy, free spirit who owns her own shop, is dating a young guy named Chad, and has a daughter named Mia; Kat Gordon, a nurse with five children and an extremely lazy, chauvinistic husband named Raymond; and Joanna Frankel, a reporter for the local paper who wants to be taken seriously by not only her job, but by the paper’s photographer, Will. While all of this is happening, Bun, the head of the Eastwick Historical Society, gives us a Mary Alice-esque off screen monologue about the history of the town’s legend dealing with witches and the townswomen.

After each woman received a mysterious token (each in a hilarious way), the women are separately drawn to the town’s water fountain, which featured three women/goddesses holding up a platform. They each made a wish based on their hangups. As their coins clicked in mid air, their powers are awakened, but they don’t know it yet. Meanwhile, Bun is mysteriously attacked by red ants, and is rushed to the hospital.

After hearing that Bun is in a coma, the three women decide all of a sudden to hang out and drink, despite not really caring for each other before. As they bond, they discuss what their wishes. Kat wants a big change and for someone to take care of her for once, Roxie wants someone sexy, rich and who understands her eccentric behavior, and Joanna wants to have ‘it’for once. While these wishes are being made, a wealthy, mysterious figure makes his way to Eastwick, hearing the three women’s desires along the way.

The next day, Roxie has a dream about a strange man entering her shop and her falling off her ladder. Later that day the dream plays out in reality. After she collected herself, the strange man gives Roxie an invitation with her name on it. Meanwhile, Joanna embarrasses herself in front of Will again and is berated by her best friend Penny for not showing up the previous night for a get together. Their slimy boss, Clyde, breaks the news of the Lennox mansion being bought, which is strange to the townspeople since the place was supposed to be a town heirloom. On top of that, the same guy bought the paper and is now Joanna’s new boss.

Roxie’s invite brings her to the Lennox mansion where she meets our mysterious stranger: Darryl van Horn, who is seductive and cocky enough to make Christian Troy jealous in envy. Darryl wants a life-sized statue of himself and wants Roxie to build it; willing to pay Roxie’s asking price, which was $50,000. Roxie voices her disgust at the ego that is in front of her, but Darryl declares that she asked for someone like him, which would have sent alarms ringing in my head, but not Roxie. She attempts to play down her increasing attraction to Darryl, but when he disrobed in front of her, I think Roxie’s resolve disrobed as well. But she didn’t sleep with him. For now.

eastwick-1The next morning, Roxie dreamed of cutting herself while prepping dinner with Kat and Joanna and later that night the event goes down the same way except Roxie prevents from cutting herself. With this newfound knowledge, the women deduce that Roxie is some kind of psychic after Roxie cuts herself a couple of minutes later.

Meanwhile Roxie’s daughter, Mia, is dating what looked to be the town bad boy. She sneaks him out the house so her mother wouldn’t know that she was dating period, not sex. This frustrates Mia’s beau, who wants to go further. This may not end well.

After trying to approach Will again, Joanna meets Darryl who caters to her desires of being a good journalist and practically repeats Joanna’s dialogue of writing an article about corruption in the purchase of the Lennox mansion. Darryl then says that Joanna should unleash her inner strength before he invites her to dinner that night.

Kat tries to get her lazy ass husband Raymond to get off his keyster and look for a job, which is like… mandatory with them having five kids and all. When Raymond tries to talk down to her, Kat gets agitated and makes the earth move, knocking Raymond on his ass. Raymond thinks that Kat had something to do to it and while she did, he couldn’t have possibly deducted that immediately so I chalk his calculations to either being drunk or guilty; both of which is 1) true and 2) more plausible.

Kat makes her rounds at the hospital and checks in on Bun, who awakes and tells Kat that what happened to her was their fault and that she can see the cone of evil. She also reveals that ‘he has been here before and he is evil, child!’Whoa, you mean Jack Nicholson?!?! Before Kat can get more out of Bun, the woman goes into shock.

At dinner, Darryl works on Joanna’s resolve and reveals to her that her eyes are the key to the power she so craves. In other words, she is secretly hypnotic. Joanna tests this newfound power on Clyde the next morning, which works and she gets her promotion. After trying to hypnotize a sullen Penny, Joanna realizes that this newfound power of hypnosis only works on males.

The three ladies have dinner at a restaurant and discuss their wild and crazy week. While Kat tells them about Bun, Darryl shows up works his charm on Kat and reveals Kat’s power, which is the naturalistic power of healing and destruction. Darryl then pulls out serves them some water from a deep well in the town that is so special that it is rumored to cure arthritis. Why isn’t this brand of water on the market? The water also makes the women drunk on their ass and they rush out the restaurant in a drunken stupor and get wild in the middle of the town’s water fountain. Some of the bystanders turn out to be Kat’s family and Raymond blows a gasket and demands for Kat to come home and forbids her to see Roxie and Joanna again. When they get home, Raymond rants and screams about Kat’s exploits, which prompts Kat to put her foot down and Raymond doesn’t take kindly to; going as far as to say he has to leave or he will hit her. When he gets outside, Kat doesn’t let up, but she gets so agitated that she makes a bolt of lightening strike Raymond square in the chest.

While riding with Darryl, Roxie precogs that Mia will be attacked by Mia’s boyfriend. She and Darryl get there in time and Darryl warns the kid that it happens again that he will kill him. No sex is worth dying for. After Darryl takes Mia and Roxie home, he flirts with Roxie again, stating that Roxie needs a man and not the ‘child’she is dating. Roxie kisses Darryl then slaps him. This repeats a couple of times before Darryl leaves.

The next day at the hospital, Raymond wakes up and accuses Kat of trying to kill him. Kat declares that she was only by his side to make sure that he was ok before she demanded for a divorce, which Raymond has no trouble agreeing to. He declares that he will take the kids, because she is an unfit mother. I would have pulled his plug so quick…

Also at the hospital is Darryl and he is checking in on Bun. What’s that about? He runs into Kat, who breaks down and tell him everything that had just transpired with Raymond. Darryl offers Kat his lawyer to fight Raymond in court. Kat accepts.

Roxie has another premonition of some strange guy attacking her in her shop and she calls Joanna about it. But Penny interrupts Joanna with jaw-dropping news: the real Darryl van Horn is dead.

So who the hell is new stranger casting a spell over Eastwick?

Stay tuned!

Read Bryon Jones’review here.

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