Therapy can be life-changing. Not just because therapists are pretty much the only people who can’t wait to hear about our weird dreams and childhood trauma, but because they can help us sort out the tangled mess of thoughts and feelings we have. That’s a pretty big deal.
Recently, a Reddit poster asked folks to share the most impactful things their therapist had said to them. People poured in with their stories, and this mental health thread became full of thought-proving statements, some of which were certainly Gandalfesque!
More info: Reddit
#1
The anxiety you’re feeling is not evil or your enemy, it’s an overprotective friend trying to keep you safe because it once saw you hurt. Do not fight it, prove it wrong.
Image source: Plus-Statistician80, Ron Lach
#2
“Change happens when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of change.”.
Image source: SpicyEmmaa, Håkon Grimstad
#3
I asked him, “How do you process all of the negative feelings that are projected at you?” and he said “They aren’t my feelings”
I don’t think he realized how profound that was.
Image source: wirestyle22, Min An
#4
You aren’t that interesting.
I would have panic attacks and paranoia that people were out to get me (PTSD etc) and would think that people were judging me in grocery stores because my toddler was crying or that my hair was messy. And honestly it boiled down to…nobody cares. We’re all trying to survive and get through the day and what someone looks like or does, we observe and move on. Nobody is that interesting. Nobody (for the most part) is going to remember to toddler crying for a brief moment or the way I was dressed or if my makeup was perfect. Nobody. The only person who will remember is me, and how I made MYSELF feel.
Image source: jac_kayyy, RF._.studio
#5
I was discussing with my therapist that although I’m still young, I felt like it was too late to achieve what I wanted my life to be. She very seriously looked me in the eye and said “Are you dead?” “Well….no” “Then there’s time” and it’s a motto I’ve been reminding myself of daily.
Image source: mindfulexhale, Jordan Benton
#6
You can’t control others, but you can control how you respond.
Image source: PinkSparklingGem, Athena Sandrini
#7
Your friends should not make you cry.
Pathetic that I needed to learn this in my 30’s, but there it is.
Image source: skynolongerblue, Alena Darmel
#8
Sometimes a thought is just a thought.
Image source: maybepensive, Norbert Kundrak
#9
You’re going to put yourself in an early grave trying to make your Mother happy. Your Mother is sick, trying to make her happy is like trying to fill a bucket that has no bottom, its not going to happen unless she fixes the bucket. You can’t fix it for her.
Image source: Moderatedude9, Karolina Kaboompics
#10
We judge ourselves by our intentions but we judge others by their actions.
Image source: horny_rapunzel, Karolina Kaboompics
#11
Some people are like a colander, it doesn’t matter how much time, love and support you pour into them, it will never fill them up enough to make a difference. .
Image source: Competitive-Watch188, Mikhail Nilov
#12
As a teen in therapy, I used to call myself a potato because of my ugly appearance. The woman I had sessions with actually gave me a small plastic potato replica and had written on it in sharpie “some people like potatoes.”
I think it was just the effort she went to trying to help me/cheer me up that really affected me and my judgement of professional help (I was an angsty kid) and after that I took getting help much more seriously.
Image source: dangerous_bends, Franco Antonio Giovanella
#13
“You need to show yourself the same kindness and compassion that you show others.”
I did not expect to get something like that in my second session.
Image source: MrSabrewulf, Pablo Heimplatz
#14
“Be the mirror, not the sponge”. Don’t absorb other people’s stress and anxiety, show it back to them gently. Changed my life.
Image source: CariocaInLA, Vince Fleming
#15
When I broke down because I was so fed up of being scared and anxious all the time he said something like.
“You can’t be brave without being scared first.”
It always stuck with me that fear, no matter how overwhelming, won’t last forever and I try to see it as a chance for me to prove to myself I can fight back and try to get through this.
Image source: AnxiousAxolotyl88, Skylar Kang
#16
“Just because the mentally ill person screaming at you lives in your home instead of on the streets doesn’t mean their opinion is any more true”
“The fact that the relationships you have with some people are involuntary doesn’t mean you should hold them to a lower standard than voluntary relationships; you can hold them to a higher standard”.
Image source: UnoriginalUse, Karolína Maršálková
#17
I’m a therapist. You know that phrase “You can’t love someone until you love yourself”?
I tell my patients thats b******t and replace it with:
“Sometimes through loving someone else, you can begin to love yourself.”.
Image source: -whyareyousosweaty-, Emma Bauso
#18
“Don’t live as though the thing you fear has happened when it hasn’t”.
Image source: tigerllort, Pixabay
#19
Me: I just want to get back to my baseline and feel okay again.
Therapist: Or, potentially feel even better than your baseline.
Very eye-opening for me in the moment because the thought had never occurred to me.
Image source: campfire_eventide, cottonbro studio
#20
Not every friend has to be a close friend, you’re able to have different kinds of friends (like levels of how close they are or how much you confide in them).
I struggle with being a loner and it affected my mental health a lot because I could count my friends on one hand. I thought of people as acquaintances or close friends with no grey area. This advice helped me appreciate more of the people who I’m not super close with but they still have a presence in my life.
Image source: boohoo_bear, Duy Pham
#21
“You deserve to take up space just as much as anyone.”
There was a whole process involved in allowing me to see my own self worth.
Image source: thedude198644, Joshua Abner
#22
That I was more addicted to the breaks and deep breathing than I was to the nicotine.
Over one year without smoking and watching my dad die of lung cancer due to a lifetime of smoking.
Image source: matriarch-momb, Kelvin Valerio
#23
“Sorry, but you’re just not that powerful.”
In response to my tendency to accept blame for everything that has gone wrong in mine and my kids lives. It should have been obvious to me but it wasn’t. When I processed this statement I felt overwhelmingly relieved.
Image source: wolfysworld
#24
Just because you feel bad doesn’t mean you are bad.
Image source: GarbageMeat, RDNE Stock project
#25
That the best way to get rid of cortisol is to scream, sing or hum. Animals shake when their levels get too high to get rid of it. Our Vargas nerve runs down our windpipe. So scream sing! You’ll feel better. Also that guilt is a heavy and useless emotion, put it down like a suitcase and walk off.
Image source: dragonflyladyofskye
#26
As you become more educated and more experienced you will outgrow people and behaviors and it will not be comfortable. You will no longer fit in.
Image source: Addhalfcupofsugar
#27
“You don’t need to please everyone all of the time. People who love you will not leave you because you disagree with them or do something they don’t like.”
She nailed a lot of my behaviours back to the fact my biological dad left when I was 9 months old. I cannot cope with perceived abandonment, and will do everything in my power to keep people happy… because they might leave me.
Image source: RhiR2020, Alexis Brown
#28
A question she asked that Immediately changed the way I saw a relationship. How much more of this b******t are you going to put up with?
Image source: OldTransportation122
#29
I had been in therapy for about a decade, and was talking to her about online dating. I said it was like being sucked into a whirlpool, in that there is only one small step between just playing around the edges and being sucked into the thing. She asked me why I used that example, and I said “Because, when I was 9, I was sucked into a whirlpool in a creek, and only survived because my brother managed to pull me out.” This started a flurry of scribbling in her notebook I had not seen before. Also answered LOTS of things.
Image source: scrubjays, Gordon Wrigley
#30
“I’m not taking your insurance anymore”.
Image source: MeatyUrology, cottonbro studio
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