85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

You know we’ve hit peak absurdity when Onion headlines barely register as satire anymore. These days, they read more like sobering journalism compared to the relentless chaos real life keeps throwing our way.

For proof, look no further than the Instagram account Not The Onion. It’s a nonstop feed of news stories so bizarre you’ll wish they were fake. Check them out below—we’re still not sure if they’re meant to make you laugh or cry.

#1

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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#3

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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#7

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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#8

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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#9

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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#10

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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#12

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#13

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#14

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#15

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#16

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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#17

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#18

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#19

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#20

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#21

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#22

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#23

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#24

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#25

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#26

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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#27

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#28

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#31

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#49

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#50

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#51

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

#85

85 Headlines That Could Pass For Satire But Are Unfortunately True (New Pics)

Image source: nottheonion

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