“Don’t read this article!” If I were to tell you that there’s nothing to see here and that you should move along, your curiosity would be piqued, wouldn’t it? You’d actually be more likely to have a read because it sounds like there’s something sus going on, right? Welcome to the vast world of reverse psychology where you encourage people to do what you want by telling them to do the polar opposite.
Oh, reverse psychology isn’t some magical technique that works all the time: it can easily backfire and it shouldn’t be your first choice of action. However, when it does work, the results can be spectacular. And that’s exactly what the parents of Reddit shared in a viral thread started up by user LeanderD, who was curious about the times that reverse psychology actually worked on munchkins. The thread was so successful that it ended up being reposted on other subreddits besides r/AskReddit.
Have a read through some of the most fascinating parenting tales, upvote the ones that you thought were the most imaginative, and let us know if they’ve inspired you to try a different approach to parenting when nothing else seems to work.
Bored Panda had a chat with Leander Digerud, aka the author of the viral thread redditor LeanderD, about the interesting inspiration behind the question as well as their thoughts on reverse psychology. You’ll find their insights below.
#1
Took my 3 year old son to one of those doctor’s visits where he was going to get a shot. He was worried about the shot on the whole drive over, almost to the point of tears. We get to the doctor’s office and a nurse subtly lets me know that my son is not just scheduled for 1 shot, but 5 of them in the same visit.
I turn to my son with an exaggerated smile and tell him, “Good news! They figured out how to take that one big shot you were going to get and instead break it up into these 5 little tiny shots so it won’t hurt nearly as much!”
You could see the relief wash over his face. He stopped squirming and relaxed completely. He took the first shot and even smiled and said “It’s true! The small ones don’t hurt!”
We actually made it through the third shot before the effect wore off and reality kicked in. Still… I counted it as a victory.
Image source: blackbird77, Mufid Majnun
#2
My mum had a friend that would put vegetables on her own plate and not the kids.
When the kids asked she would be reluctant to share, “that’s grown up food. But I suppose I can let you have a little.”
Her kids grew up loving vegetables.
I sat at the dinner table for 3 hours staring at the yucky cauliflower I refused to eat.
Image source: laik72, Dilyara Garifullina
#3
When I was a kid I refused to get up in the morning. My mom said we were going to trick my dad into thinking I was still asleep. So she made me put on clothes and then hide under the covers and pretend to be asleep. Then my dad would come in to wake me up and I would “fool” him because I was already dressed and ready. This worked on me for years and I never questioned it. In hindsight it’s pretty obvious that my parents just wanted me to get dressed without a fuss.
Image source: mfiggfi, Snowy Vin
#4
One of my best friends through childhood used to be punished with no salad if she missbehaved. She cherishes salad now and would always try to eat as much as possible during school lunch. Coincidentally, her now husband used to be punished with no books, it had the same effect. I think it’s hilarious that they’d be hitting the salad bar and library like some black market their narc parents couldn’t reach hahaha.
Image source: cookiearthquake, Yoav Aziz
#5
Not reverse psychology exactly, but when my first son was about 4 he would often burst into our bedroom way too early in the morning, full of energy. It was up to me to either get up and engage with him or send him off on some mission so as to grab a few more precious minutes of shut-eye.
One I’m proud of was telling him to find out which of his legs could run the fastest. He was charging around the corridor for ages doing a kind of manic goose-step before he came back in panting that they were both the same.
Image source: Georgeisthecoolest, Sharon McCutcheon
#6
I don’t so much know if you would call it reverse psychology, but I didn’t realise it until my dad told me this.
When there were chores that needed doing, he noticed if he asked me to mow the lawn, I would complain and procrastinate. But if he asked would I rather mow the lawn or wash the windows, I’d pick one and just get it done.
Shattered my brain when he told me when I was in my twenties. I use it when I’m coaching or baby sitting all the time and it almost never fails.
Image source: AppealToReason16, Daniel Watson
#7
Dad, and certified foster parent here. Best trick I learned: Give kids choices. Would you like water or apple juice? Would you prefer to read or make up your room? This way, you guide them, but it is their choice. Always give them option A or B. Maybe change B for C if they argue. But be firm, if they don’t choose, then you tell them you will make a decision for them. At the end, they will choose, and will feel a commitment to their choice.
Image source: airetupal
#8
I used to tell my little toddlers that if they were fibbing, a black dot would appear on their tongue to their mother. So if I suspected a lie, I’d just say, “Stick out your tongue”. If they kept tight lipped, I knew I was right. They are teenagers now and laugh about how they fell for this for YEARS.
Image source: TeenyBopper99
#9
Child here, but still a great example .Once when my parents were having a party, I got a bad case of hiccups. After a while my dad whipped out his wallet and pulled out a $100 bill. I was probably 12 so that was a fortune to me. He said if I hiccuped again I could have the money.
Standing there, a ton of adult eyes watching to see if I’d do it, and not a single hiccup came out. I was cured and pissed.
Image source: [unknow]
#10
I work with toddlers and sometimes if they fall down or get “hurt” then I’ll clap and cheer and tell them wow that was so cool. They smile and get up instead of crying and continue playing. I only do this when they fall and pause thinking if they should cry or not
Image source: Narwhalinspace
#11
My son was really impulsive when he was little and would try to run away from me when we would be crossing streets instead of holding my hand. So I started to tell him that he needed to hold my hand so nobody would try to steal me. It worked. He felt responsible for making sure nobody tried to kidnap me out in public.
Image source: TimelyKaleidoscope, Andre Ouellet
#12
My dad used to say that when the ice cream truck was playing music it meant he had run out of ice cream.
Wait, that’s not reverse psychology. THAT’S JUST LYING, DAD.
Image source: jay76, Vincent Creton
#13
“I bet you can’t…”
Both of them HATE the assertion that they’re not capable of doing something.
“Can you put your toys away?” will almost certainly garner a hard NO, but “I bet you can’t put all those toys back in the box, no way you’ll be able to” will have them whizzing round tidying like demons, followed by a very indignant “see, I told you I could!”. Cue fake surprise from me.
They’re only 4 and 7, so I know this has got limited time, but so far works like a charm every time.
Image source: bibbobbins, Mika Baumeister
#14
As a former kid, the best reversal my mom ever did was to get me to eat liver. Which I hated.
So she came up with this dish called Revil. With onions. And served it. And I wolfed it down glad to not have to eat liver.
It took me years. YEARS! to realize what was going on. Not because I was dumb. But I never expected to be fooled on this and not in such a cheap, underhanded way.
Spell it backwards? All you did was rename it? And it WORKED? Mom! Dammit.
RIP Mom. I still make my own Revil now and then just to reminisce.
Image source: fourflatyres
#15
My dad used to play a game to see who could match and fold the most laundry he never once won.
Image source: stonerplumber, Sarah Brown
#16
It seemed like the minute my son realized he was going through puberty, he developed a need to show everyone how strong he was, usually by carrying things. Now, my son was a rather small, wiry, hyperkinetic kid – not at all a football player or weightlifter type. Yet I noticed starting when he was around 13 that if something heavy or heavy-ish needed moving, he was always right there, with a need to show he could do it.
I took full advantage. I don’t think I lifted anything heavier than my purse until he moved out. All I had to do was mention that I was going to put X in Y place (put the suitcases in the car for vacation, carry that gigantic load of laundry upstairs, etc.), and pretend like it was too heavy for me and he would appear as if summoned from the universe to do it for me. The reverse psychology aspect was my saying “Oh my! That looks heavy!” and him proving to me that “No it’s not!”
Image source: sirdigbykittencaesar, ConvertKit
#17
“No, you cannot take this after school science extra curricular activity. They have robots, lasers, explosions, and other dangerous stuff like that”.
Image source: ManOfLaBook, Alex Knight
#18
Hi I was a victim,
There was a forbidden book that I was not allow to read on the shelf. My parents said I could only read it if I behave myself.
It was summer holidays and I was playing games all day (after 6 hrs of summer homework). One day I was home alone and had the opportunity to grabbed it. I read like half of it in one go. It was 5000 years of Chinese history.
Safe to say I was bamboozled.
Image source: oddstodd, Fang-Wei Lin
#19
I don’t know if it was truly reverse psychology, or an exhausted response out of desperation…
We were in line at the grocery store checking out. Kid was three, and the meltdown started, and quickly became an on the floor tantrum.
I looked down and said, louder than normal, but not yelling, “Where is your mother? We need to find your mom!”
She was startled, because i am her mom, and confused. But the tantrum ended quickly, and with hugs.
Image source: stephlj
#20
I substitute teach sometimes, and if I get word ahead of time that the class is rowdy, I’ll pretend I lost my voice. I write stuff down on a mini whiteboard, type on a screen. The students see that I need their help and they’re a little easier to deal with. Facial expressions and gestures end up creating a naturally quiet environment. Always fun to surprise the kids at the end when I speak lol.
Image source: SuperDuperTurtle
#21
My child was reluctant when it came to putting away toys. However he loves timed tasks and is very competitive. I’d instruct my child to Put away all the red toys as fast as possible. Then blue. Then green, etc.
Toys away.
Image source: divorced_dad_670
#22
Do you want your dinner now or in ten minutes – the illusion of choice.
Image source: Cardus, Jason Leung
#23
I learned this thing called “The Ok trick” while working in a call center. You ask someone a question, and follow it up with “Ok.” People tent to respond to a positive with a positive, so calls would go like this:
Me: Well, we’ll have to terminate this account then have you reopen one to add your card back in, ok?
Customer: Ummm, ok.
Found out that this works super well on children.
Me: Hey bud, five more minutes and then it’s time for bed, ok?
Bud: Uhhh, ok.
Image source: Life_in_gray_scale, Jp Valery
#24
My parents always told me my broccoli were the flowers of the queen and that I really shouldnt eat them, or else the queen would get very upset! I, ofcourse, ate the whole brocolli in a few seconds.
Image source: Subwoofy, Reinaldo Kevin
#25
Mum had sworn a bit around the house.
When 4, while out at the supermarket, I said the F word really loudly.
Very quickly and intently, she asked if I had just said “Truck” and said that was a bad word and not to ever say “Truck” like that again.
I thought that was the bad word so used that when being naughty.
Image source: GodOfTheThunder
#26
My 3yo daughter sometimes doesn’t want to climb the stairs to our room and wants me to carry her, sayin “Don’t know how to climb.”
When she does it I say “Show me how you don’t know.” and she climbs few steps to show me how she can’t. We repeat that until she’s upstairs.
“How come you climbed it all if you don’t know how?” i ask afterwards.
“I guess I knew.” she answers. …:)
Image source: Marcu3s
#27
Wanted to name my boat. Anything I would think of was dismissed as stupid by my 13 year old son. After deciding on a name, I confided to a male friend my son liked. Made my friend suggest the name as though it was his idea. My son thought the name was perfect. Done.
Image source: calypsodweller
#28
Whenever my co-worker would feed any sort of meat to her kids, it was “chicken.” Because they wouldn’t eat anything but chicken. Piece of steak? It’s chicken. Pork? It’s chicken? Chicken? It’s Chicken.
Image source: woo545, Claudio Schwarz
#29
When my children were younger, I’d say “Hey if you do _______ (insert chore), then I’ll buy you dinner tonight”
They would get all excited and then go do the chore. Afterwards they’d say, “wait, you buy me dinner everynight”
Image source: 33Wolverine33, Izz R
#30
My mum would always yell at us “if you don’t do X, you have to go to bed without socks!”
I never wore socks anyway, and I’m ashamed to admit that this worked
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