It can be flattering when a man slides into your DMs. If he’s charming, respectful, and someone you might be interested in, you may welcome his advances. But if he’s aggressive, rude, and fails to take no for an answer, he might end up getting blocked. Not before the woman he’s persistently pursuing screenshots his messages, though!
We took a trip to the “Men Talking To Themselves in Your Inbox” Facebook group and gathered some of their wildest posts below. From sending a slew of drunken texts at 3 a.m. to becoming angry when a woman doesn’t respond within seconds, some men out there clearly don’t understand proper texting etiquette. Enjoy scrolling through these one-sided conversations that might give you second-hand embarrassment, and be sure to upvote the ones that you find particularly entertaining.
#1
Image source: Mary-Jane Cresswell
#2
Image source: Sarah Holdsworth
#3
Image source: Wendee Aurora
There’s no question that it’s hard out there for those in the dating pool. It can feel impossible to meet anyone nowadays unless you want to download an app, and standing out from the crowd can be extremely difficult. People tend to judge an image much more harshly than they would judge a person sitting across from them at a bar, and there’s no way of knowing if the information on their dating profile is even true.
After all, one study found that 65% of Tinder users are already married or in a relationship. So it can be challenging to figure out how to navigate the dating world without wasting time and energy looking in all the wrong places. But apparently, as this list makes very clear, the strategy deployed by some men is just to message women as much as possible and hope for the best.
#4
Image source: Jordan Low
#5
Image source: Anonymous Participant
#6
Image source: Hannah Olsson
When it comes to why we see this behavior from men far more often than from women, there are plenty of factors to consider. One being the fact that women are much more selective on dating apps than men. In fact, over 80% of women will only like one profile out of every 100 that they swipe through. Meanwhile, a study from OkCupid found that most women consider 80% of men to be unattractive.
However, men, on the other hand, tend to swipe right on nearly half of the profiles they come across. And the majority of men say that they reply to messages within 5 minutes, while only 18% of women do the same. So perhaps these men grow impatient and begin sending more and more messages, desperately hoping for a response.
#7
Image source: Ta Lafferty
#8
Image source: Stella Rastovac
#9
Image source: Anjie Mishra
One of the biggest issues that is made very apparent through these posts is the fact that some men can’t take no for an answer. Instead of respectfully taking the hint that these women aren’t interested, they continue sending message after message, sometimes becoming rude and aggressive, believing that will somehow convince the women to change their minds. And according to Suzanne Degges-White, PhD, part of the reason for this may be that some men are hypersensitive to rejection.
#10
Image source: Shannon Barrowcliffe
#11
Image source: Autumn Freeman
#12
Image source: Willow KH
Dr. Degges-White wrote a piece for Psychology Today discussing some of the unhealthy responses that men may have when they’re hypersensitive to rejection. While nobody likes to be turned down, it’s not a good sign when someone’s reaction to being rejected is behavior that “is likely to garner even stronger or more widespread rejection,” the expert notes.
#13
Image source: Kim Blaine Ford
#14
Image source: Gaybuzzer
#15
Image source: Anonymous Participant
Men and women also tend to respond differently to rejection, due to the difference in cultural expectations that each gender faces.
“Males tend to take rejection as a challenge to their masculinity or an insult to their perceived place in the social hierarchy,” Degges-White explains. “Women are likely to feel emotionally hurt by a rejection and to assume that there is something lacking in them that warranted the rejection. Or blame the person who did the rejecting, but use self-soothing to get over the insult, rather than lashing out as males might do.”
#16
Image source: Bri Farley
#17
Image source: Katie Smith
#18
Image source: Katie Chapman
Another factor that may impact how men pursue women is what they’ve been shown in the media. We’ve all seen a romantic comedy where a teen boy or man goes after a woman who clearly has absolutely no interest in him. But after months or years of wearing her down, she finally agrees that they’re meant to be. This can be a dangerous message to send men. Instead of teaching them to respect women’s wishes and take no for an answer, they are taught that with enough persistence (and sometimes harassment), the woman will eventually give in.
#19
Image source: Tornado Aly
#20
Image source: Kristen Wargo
#21
Image source: Willow Kh
Elite Daily published a piece breaking down some of the most popular examples of films where men succeeded in getting the girl after exhibiting creepy or inappropriate behavior. For example, in The Girl Next Door, a teen gets caught watching his neighbor undress through the window. But instead of being disgusted, she eventually falls for him. Meanwhile, in Superbad, Seth and Evan decide that the only way they can get a girl interested in them is by getting her drunk first. Unfortunately, these popular movies can have a huge impact on how men’s views on women and dating are shaped.
#22
Image source: Jade Theriault
#23
Image source: Sarah Holdsworth
#24
Image source: Bethany Black
How do you feel about all of the screenshots on this list, pandas? Are you simply cringing, or can you relate to having a flood of messages from strange men pouring into your inbox? Keep upvoting the pics that you find particularly awkward, and let us know in the comments below how you would respond if you were in these women’s shoes. Then, if you’re interested in checking out another article from Bored Panda featuring uncomfortable messages from men, look no further than right here!
#25
Image source: Bethany Black
#26
Image source: Elicia Stopford Proctor
#27
Image source: Σαπ Φω
#28
Image source: Anonymous participant
#29
Image source: Suzanne Taylor
#30
Image source: Anonymous Participant
#31
Image source: Amber Michelle
#32
Image source: Sam Scienski
#33
Image source: Alicyn Lang
#34
Image source: Alisabeth Gardner
#35
Image source: Trina Milaska
#36
Image source: Bree Hartzler
#37
Image source: Kukki Kitagawa
#38
Image source: Bree Hartzler
#39
Image source: bestie
#40
Image source: Kris Ellis
#41
Image source: Michele Lazarow
#42
Image source: Jackie Greene
#43
Image source: Anonymous Participant
#44
Image source: Chelsea Nichole
#45
Image source: Kelly Deconda
#46
Image source: Anonymous Participant
#47
Image source: Seana Quigley
#48
Image source: Seana Quigley
#49
Image source: Anonymous Participant
#50
Image source: Caroline Sleit
#51
Image source: Taelyn Gourley
#52
Image source: Kris Ellis
#53
Image source: Michele Lazarow
#54
Image source: Jordan Low
#55
Image source: Anonymous Participant
#56
Image source: Jordan Low
#57
Image source: Marye Abdulla
#58
Image source: Allison Blank
#59
Image source: Trina Milaska
#60
Image source: Anonymous Participant
#61
Image source: Angela Rae Grano
#62
Image source: Anonymous Participant
#63
Image source: Kendra Snow
#64
Image source: Violet Viall
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