Hey Pandas, Tell Me Your Best Jokes (Closed)

I love jokes, so tell me yours!

Normal jokes, not anything that could hurt someone’s feelings, please.

#1

What do you call a pig that can do karate? Pork chop. Heres another one. Why did the kid throwed the clock? To see time flies

#2

⚠️ dad joke incoming ⚠️ What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? So-fish-ticated.

#3

What is the difference between autumn and fall? Humpty Dumpty never had a great autumn.

#4

Here is one from me:

What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody knows!

#5

Two guys walked into a bar. The third guy ducked 😂

#6

What do people in the middle east call their cheese?
Cheeses of Nazareth

#7

What do you get when Al Gore plays the drums?

An algorithm.

#8

So there’s three couples at the pearly gates trying to get in to heaven. St. Peter tells them their fates are dependant on how the husband behaved. St. Peter turns to first couple and says to the husband “You loved money so much you married a woman named Penny! Take the door to hell!”
He turns to the second couple and says “You loved alcohol so much that you married a woman named Brandy. Take the door to hell!”
He turns the third couple who are already heading the door marked hell. Saint Peter says “Don’t you want me to read your decision?”
The third guy says “No I know where this is going.” He turns to his wife and says “Come on F***y!”

#9

Another green joke:

It’s green and gliding down a mountain: Skiwi

#10

Daredevil walked into a bar, and a chair, and a table

#11

What’s green and has wheels?

Grass. I lied about the wheels.