Grey’s Anatomy had two very important messages as Dr. Miranda Bailey faced down her own mortality. The first, when it comes to your health, you must be your own advocate. There may come a point where you have to fight for your rights, to fight for what you know about your own body. The second is that life is too short to play it safe. The same way Bailey has to let go of her fear for Ben’s safety in his new job, we too must let go of some of the fear. We can only hope to do it with the same persistence and courage that Bailey showed in one of her most vulnerable moments.
Miranda Bailey is not given to panic easily. She didn’t get to be the Chief of Surgery, and one of the most respected doctors at Grey Sloan Memorial, by being weak. Though she has long retired the ‘Nazi’ moniker, she lives her life with the same force that she did as a resident. Little did we know just how much of that force was in her as a child. As Bailey waited for someone, anyone to believe that she was having a heart attack, we got some flashbacks to Bailey’s childhood. Yes, she was stubborn about her independence. This was not an easy thing to be when she had such an overprotective mother who was, quite frankly, ruled by her fears. After 14 years of knowing Dr. Bailey, the audience learned that she once had a sister, who died as an infant. Though her mother’s fears made sense after that, teenage Bailey was determined to talk her mother through it so that she could go after her dreams in peace. Which she did, and so much more.
Come back to the present, and we have to take notes from Bailey. She was the perfect example of what to do in a situation where doctors tell you that nothing is wrong, but you know with every fiber of your being that it isn’t. It is no wonder that Bailey’s frustration, indignation, and desperation grows every passing minute that the doctors at Seattle Presbyterian do not believe she is having a heart attack. Because she is not dramatically clutching her chest, and the heart monitor shows no abnormalities, she must be mistaken right? She’s a woman with a stressful job and a history of OCD, so it must be all in her head, right?
Here is where we must take notes from Dr. Bailey. 1) Know your statistics. Dr. Bailey knew her chances for a heart attack by age, ethnicity, and gender. She knew precisely how heart attacks look differently for women then men. So when her intuition was not good enough, she had facts on her side, and would fight for the tests she needed to prove herself. 2) Have support. This is where Dr. Bailey held on too tight to one of her most basic fears. Bailey has never, ever been a person who could ask for help. It was like pulling teeth for her to allow Ben to take over some of the responsibilities in the beginning of their relationship. That fear also goes to the root of her OCD. But it doesn’t make her crazy. It just makes her even more stubborn.
Not till she collapsed tending to another patient that the doctors were ignoring (Amy Landecker as Bailey’s “live life to the fullest” ER neighbor), did everyone pay attention. Luckily, by that point Maggie and Webber had arrived, and would bulldoze anyone standing in their way to treat Bailey. You could practically feel the anger coming off of Maggie, having to fight a doctor who blamed standard protocol and his own inexperience with a specific procedure as reasons for the mistakes he made with Bailey. Maggie has been blessed to work in the diverse, cutting edge environment that Webber and Bailey spent years setting up. Any other hospital, like the one Bailey was doomed to walk into, would stifle Maggie’s abilities and her knowledge, simply because she is a younger woman of color.
Bailey does get through the worst of it, eventually letting Ben know that she is in the hospital. After seeing how much stress he has put on his wife with his career change, Ben thinks that quitting would be the best option. But Bailey comes out of this near-death experience with more determination, not less. Proof of that is in her flashbacks with Callie, George (RIP), and Derek (RIP). Bailey is a force, and she didn’t get this far, and lose so many friends so young, to not know how precious life is. She has to alleviate her own stress by being more open about her fears, and Ben has to go after his dreams. Because life doesn’t always give second chances, so we have to go after what we want while we can.
What did Dr. Bailey’s bottle episode say to you?
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