Medical professionals, if they are doing their jobs, tend to get used to all sorts of things fairly quickly. This might still be cold comfort for most patients who often have to deal with pretty uncomfortable things without the benefit of experience or training. After all, it’s sometimes a stressful environment and things really can just go wrong.
Someone asked “what embarrassing moments have you had in a doctor’s office?” and people detailed their worst stories. So get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to share your own experiences if you dare.
#1
Had a routine smear (pap) test as a student, I hadn’t slept the night before as I’d been partying hard and was still not quite with it.
The male doctor hadn’t performed a smear before and for some reason a nurse was called in to witness the procedure. Predictably the doc had trouble finding my cervix and the nurse told me to roll my hips up. The doctor was getting more and more nervy so to break the ice I started singing “rolling rolling rolling, keep those doggies movin, rawhide” (it made sense at the time)
Then I started to laugh uncontrollably at my own joke which caused the speculum to shoot out of my hooha and knock his glasses off.
The lab results were inconclusive.
Image source: anon, Ben Weber / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#2
This happened to a friend’s mother:
She was trying out a new OB/GYN. Post-examination, she was given a cup and directed to supply the office with a urine sample. Upon arriving at the bathroom, she saw that it had no door!
Friend’s mom just assumed that this new, free-wheeling OB/GYN office didn’t have bathroom doors and all the patients did their business in the light. So, nervously, she proceeded to create/collect the sample as people walked by in the hallway outside. I imagine they pretended not to notice or gave her strange looks, but it wasn’t until she was leaving the bathroom that she noticed the fully retracted sliding door.
Image source: imascientist, tabitha turner / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#3
When I was 7 my doctor told me to drop my pants (you know, the ‘ole hernia check). I ran out and screamed to my mom that the doctor was crazy and wanted to see my [private parts]. I specifically remember screaming “Mom, get your coat! This guy is crazy!”.
Image source: Immynimmy, Kateryna Hliznitsova / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#4
I had a kidney infection and I went to the ER at about 5am one morning on my college campus. They gave me morphine for the pain and for some reason I started singing Bohemian Rhapsody at a pretty high level, surrounded by peers. The nurses had to ask me to quiet down about 5 times until the morphine wore off…
Image source: rosmt1, A. C. / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#5
As a transguy, I had to get a hysterectomy. Calling out “Jeffrey” in the OBGYN waiting room full of women is pretty mortifying.
Then when I was in the office the doctor said, “Don’t worry, nobody likes this. Well, I have 2 patients that like it. They are in their 80’s and 90’s and they make an appointment every other week.”
He was a pretty awesome doctor too. When I got out of surgery he said, “You did great.” I said, “But I didn’t do anything.” To which he replied, “Well then I was great.”
Image source: heyheyjeffreyjay, Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#6
I arrived at my doctor’s office for a routine physical and everything was going fine. My previous conditions had all gone away and we were wrapping up when my doctor (female by the way, I am male) told me that she was “Going to need to check me for an enema.” She turned away for a moment to put on some gloves as she did so I stood up, took off my pants, and bent over.
I misheard her. One does not “check” for an enema. One checks for a hernia.
The moment she turned around I heard “Oh sweet Jesus, what!” and I immediately realized my mistake. I quickly turned around to see my now bright-red doctor flushing over the completely unprecedented sight of my anus pointed in her direction. I began to apologize profusely and what followed can only be described as an extremely awkward check for testicular cancer and a hasty departure on her part. Needless to say I, too, got out of there as quickly as possible.
Image source: JustHavinAGoodTime, Ahmet Kurt / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#7
Happened to a co-worker…
He wanted to get a vasectomy…two guys in the office had recommended a doctor they had used. To have some fun, they tell him that during the first consultation, he’ll have to [give a sample] into a cup for testing purposes.
Upon his arrival at the doctor’s office he speaks to the front desk nurse. After the paperwork, she hands him a cup, tells him to fill to the line, cap it and leave it on the sink. The cup was the size a tumbler glass and line was way at the top.
This guy goes in, thinking he needs to [give a sample]…sees no “inspirational” material but figures he can just wing it from memory. After about 10 minutes, nurse knocks on the door, asks if everything is OK.
Embarrassed about his output compared to the goal, he shows her the cup with the meager contribution and asks how the other guys filled to the line.
The nurse bursts out laughing and in between trying to catch her breath, tells him he was supposed to [urinate] in the cup.
After cleaning up, he had to go wait out in the waiting room with a large glass of water. He sat there about 30 minutes before doing a proper test and seeing the doctor. He said it was the longest 30 minutes of his life because within 5 minutes not a single nurse could keep a straight face.
Image source: Deadlift50, Brooke Balentine / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#8
I had a pizza delivery guy walk in on me while I was getting a pelvic exam at the OB/GYN. My feet were up in the stirrups, my doctor’s hand was in my [private parts]..yeah, the whole bit. Apparently the nurses had ordered a pizza and directed the guy to bring it to the break room, but he opened the wrong door. You’d think at an OB/GYN you’d at least knock before entering any closed rooms, right? Yeah, no. He couldn’t have seen anything, though, and I’m pretty sure he was more embarrassed than I was.
Image source: betti_cola, Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#9
Probably not the *most* embarrassing, but happened recently.
The last time I was at my doctor’s office I was kept waiting in the exam room for a really long time. Like long enough to go through all three magazines in the room. Eventually severe boredom set in and I started looking for other things to do.
There was a scale in the corner, so I thought *what the hell lets weigh some [stuff].* I started with my shoes, and eventually moved on to the magazines and my clothes. When I ran out of personal stuff, I surveyed the room and decided that I would like to know how much a chair weighs, so on the scale it went.
This is the exact moment the doctor and her resident decide to enter the room. There I am wearing nothing but a hospital gown and socks balancing a chair on the scale…
tldr; a doctor’s office chair weighs 8lbs.
Image source: linds360, Curated Lifestyle / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#10
When I was delivering my second child I was determined to not have a bowel movement and did an enema to help prevent this from happening. It did clean me out, however it caused the worst gas I had ever had in my life. I had an epidural so I couldn’t really feel anything and by the time I was ready to push I figured the gas had passed. I let the doctor know I was ready and he went right down there “in the danger zone”. He timed my contractions and let me know it was time for a good push. I pushed with all my baby delivering might and ripped the biggest, longest fart right in his face. I saw his hair literally blow back. Didn’t help that he was young and attractive.
Image source: yummy_mummy, Alexander Grey / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#11
I have a very bad sense of direction. At the hospital I went to the bathroom to give a urine sample, and quickly realised I couldn’t remember how to get back to my doctor’s room. I don’t know how many waiting rooms and crowded corridors i wandered through, holding a cardboard cup of my own pee.
Image source: annana
#12
Had (well, have) a pilonidal cyst that I needed to go get lanced and drained since I wasn’t able to sit or wear pants due to the cyst being sensitive. Got to the doctor and he was amazed at how large the cyst had gotten, and wanted to bring in the nurses/students/interested parties to show them a “prime example of this cyst”.
Flash forward two minutes and I’ve assumed the position over an examining table with my pants at my ankles and 7-10 people gasping and speaking in hushed voices about a egg-sized cyst right above my [butt].
I just found it amusing, luckily, otherwise it probably would’ve been mortifying.
Image source: notslackingatworkno, Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#13
Went to the gynecologist for a stinky smell and they found a tampon up there from the previous month. I had allowed a medical student to observe. Pretty mortifying.
Image source: Whore_Bag, Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#14
I told the doctor my stomach was all bloated and swollen, she said I just needed to lose weight.
Image source: Badman2, Edu Bastidas / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#15
While I was in labor with my first child her heartbeat started dropping. The doctors begin telling me that I have to try lying in different positions on the bed because the cord may be around her neck and we need to alleviate the pressure. They put me on my left side then my right side. Nothing is helping so they have me get on my hands and knees on the table. [Under meds], I declare proudly that this is the same position that my child was conceived in.
Image source: bobandfriends, Jimmy Conover / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#16
I had some bleeding a while back (not enough fiber) and when the doc had me bend over and stuck his finger inside, I asked “Oh, so no dinner first?”
I discovered later that I go to church with the man….
Image source: SamuelColts454, Andrej Lišakov / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#17
So, I’m at the doctor, getting the [testicles] check from my late forties doctor, and she starts making small talk. She asks where I go to school, I say the name of my high school, she says, “Oh my son goes there.”
Suddenly I realize, my doctor has the same last name as one of my best friends from school. My friend’s mom is a doctor. My friends mom is rubbing my [testicles].
While extremely awkward it was pretty funny at school the next day.
“So I met your mom yesterday. She said I had very healthy [testicles]”.
Image source: PaperStreetSoap, Jordan González / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#18
I had gallstones, and needed to get my gallbladder out. As I’m miserably and loudly puking in the ER, I look up to see an entire Asian family STARING at me in horror. The friend who took me still can’t eat broccoli.
Image source: anon, Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#19
I gave myself a concussion skiing the park at Cadrona, in New Zealand; I caught an edge speed-checking a jump, not my finest moment. It was a pretty serious concussion and I was knocked out for a couple of minutes, coming to once patrol arrived to speak the wonderful phrase, “My neck hurts”. I slipped back in to unconciousness while they threw a collar on me and got me on the backboard, took me down to the patrol clinic and waited for an ambulance.
Now, concussions very often give you nausea. I had nausea. I remember vomiting in the clinic several times while waiting for the ambulance to arrive. Cadrona is also about an hour away from Queenstown, where we were staying. The nearest hospital was in exactly the wrong direction (Wanaka) of Queenstown and only a little closer, so they sent me to Queenstown. An hour+ of riding down sketchy New Zealand mountain roads led me to being wheeled in to the Emergency entrance at the hospital in Queenstown.
As I was being wheeled in, the attending physician greeted me and asked me how I was feeling. Upon being wheeled in, my brain took note of a few things: that the hospital was not busy at all, the floors had just been cleaned and this doctor had just donned a freshly ironed white coat. Everything looked recently cleaned and spit-shined.
He asks me how I’m doing, and when he reaches my gurney, my only response is to lean over towards him (still in a collar, not on a backboard or tied down) and projectile vomit the most vomit I have ever projectiled upon this mans poor chest and lap area. I then promptly slipped back in to unconsciousness.
Image source: Dentzu, Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#20
Not exactly embarassing but definitely a WTF moment:
I wear small over-the-ear hearing aids in both ears, and had to go in for new fittings in a city well over 3 hours away from me because the left one would consistently hurt when I placed it in. I get the new fittings, no problems here, and go on about my way.
3 months later, I’m going to my primary care for a physical before beginning a new SCUBA diving class, and he asks if I’ve ever had tubes in my ears. I told him I used to, but I was very young, and he’s determined to figure out what this little rubber thing is in my ear. Cue grabbing mosquito forceps, fishing for 5 minutes, and pulling out one of the fittings!
I never knew I had a 2nd one in there, I just kept using my hearing aids normally, and noticed a whole new level of clarity after he got that out.
Image source: MusicLikesMe
#21
First physical of my life. I drop my pants and the doctor says turn your head and cough. I hear turn your head and crawl. I cannot explain the levels of confusion and awkwardness that followed.
Image source: doublej308, Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#22
I had to go to the ER for bronchitis (thanks to my insurance being really stupid if I’m out of state).
When I got taken into a room, the nurse did her thing then handed me a hospital gown to put on. She said “take off everything from the waist down” or something to that effect. I thought this was odd, since I was coming in for a cough, chest issues and so on. But I obliged as soon as she left.
The doctor came in soon after and gave me a look that I can only assume was a “what in the hell” sort of look. But he didn’t say anything. He just started listening to my breathing and so on and so forth. Everything’s good. I get a prescription and leave.
Then I’m telling my mom about how odd it is that they made me take off my pants and everything while I was in there. *And then it dawned on me.* The nurse had said “take off everything *except* from your waist down”.
I did the exact opposite. And the doctor probably thought I was a complete moron but decided not to say anything to my face about it. I’m sure that was a story to tell his colleagues after the fact.
I’m really glad I didn’t realize my folly during the visit, but I’ve had my fair share of embarrassment after the fact when I think about it. :(.
Image source: ThatStitchCray, Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#23
A friend’s mom went to a new OB/GYN. Before the visit, she sprayed something *down there* to make sure the doctor would be greeted with a pleasant aroma. Unknowingly, what she sprayed had glitter in it. So she was all glittered up and had no idea. The doctor, who was male, upon seeing the sight said “fancy!” and proceeded with the exam. Apparently, hearing a doctor exclaim “fancy!” makes this kind of thing awkward for the patient. It wasn’t until later that she discovered that the doctor was reacting to the glitter. She was, of course, mortified.
Image source: TheWayoftheFuture, S L / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#24
Well, I don’t know if this counts, but I did this to my husband. I had to have a procedure where they put me under anesthesia (the good stuff; knocks you out, but you wake up somewhat quickly later). So, my husband’s in the waiting room and I’m in the surgery. Procedure happens, all is fine. When I’m coming out of the anesthesia, I feel great. Happy, but blurry, and the nurse has gotten my husband. He’s standing there, waiting for me, and I look up at him, and well up with love. I also yell out my pet (and secret) name for him, “Pookie Boooooo! It’s you!!!! Oh, Boo, I’m so happy for my Pookie Boooooo!” My husband is glad that I’m doing all right, but is secretly mortified. There are about 10 nurses in the recovery room, and all smiling sweetly at my 6’1, burly Pookie Boo. He will never forgive me.
Image source: pbrooks19
#25
I was at the doctor’s office for a physical before my freshman year of college. The doctor was this assertive and intimidating female, and it came time for the hernia check. Now, for my whole life this procedure involved the doctor cupping a testicle and asking me to cough. However, I guess they only need to feel just above the genitals (where my ovaries would be if I was female) these days, but I was not aware.
So I am sitting on the exam table, and the doctor asked me to unbutton my pants for the hernia exam (I was ignorant that they didn’t need to come down). Then she turned away to go get a glove. At this point, I pulled my pants down to my knees. She walks over with a perfect poker face and calmly places her hand on my lower stomach and asks me to cough. She checked both sides twice, the entire time with my genitals needlessly exposed.
Image source: derrrrrrrrr, Anna Keibalo / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#26
When I was studying to become a dentist I was following a doctor in the ER a couple of weekends as part of my education in general medicine. Well, one late saturday a young girl, around 18 I think, comes in with her parents because of severe stomach pains. The doctor asks a few questions and then asks the girl to take off her pants and lay down on her side. The doc then puts on a glove and shoves a finger up the girl’s [butt]. I had seen this before, standard procedure, but never with a cute girl as the receiver. So I was already a bit embarassed when the father turns to me and asks me how many years I’ve got left until I’m a doctor. “Well umm.. I’m actually studying to become a dentist.” Really made me feel I was at the wrong end of things.
EDIT: To answer a few questions: If I remember correctly the girl was constipated. Finger in the [butt] to check for blood in your intestines to rule out internal bleeding. She was anxious, her parents followed her because of that. The father sat at the patients head to calm her down. The doc was a woman. I promptly left the room when the father shot me a weird look after telling him I was studying to become a dentist, couldn’t handle the awkwardness. Sadly, I had no pizza.
Image source: Rosenfrez, Yunus Tuğ / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#27
I attempted chemical hair removal for the first time the day before my appointment with the gynecologist. Her response: “And *that* is chemical burn.”
Image source: themodernvictorian, Nataliya Melnychuk / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#28
Second child on the way, my wife wakes up with contractions. Happens to be the same day that she had a scheduled appointment with the doctor to check progress, so we just kept that appointment. We meet the (female) doctor in the clinic, across the parking lot from the hospital.
I’m in the exam room, doctor is checking my wife, who’s up in stirrups. “Oh, yeah, you’re pretty dilated and effaced, today is definitely the day.” I’m sitting nearby, politely averting my gaze, when the doctor says, “Your bag of water is bulging, too, I bet I could –*uh oh.*” My wife starts laughing nervously.
I look up to see the doctor, two fingers deep in my extremely pregnant wife, trying desperately to prevent the now broken water from flooding the exam room. She stretches to reach a bottom drawer, and some amniotic fluid kind of sprays out in odd directions. The doctor has me get some absorbent pads out of the drawer and lay them down before removing her fingers and jumping out of the way.
Image source: Nougat, Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#29
My doctor tapped my knee to check reflexes & I kicked her in the cooter.
Image source: beaverscleaver, Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#30
This happened at the pharmacy at my doctor’s office. I had just have a wisdom tooth removed. (A stubborn one at that) I had it removed in the morning and i was good, not sick or anything most of the day, but by the time the next day rolled around, i was the sickest I had ever been. Everything made me vomit, even moving more than a few feet made me vomit. The dentist didn’t think to prescribe me any antibiotics or anything, so i had to call him to let him know how sick i was. He told me he would call in the order and i could pick it up at the pharmacy in the hospital down the street. The kicker was that they closed in 10 minutes. I rushed to get there and made it with 2 minutes to spare, however as they were getting my prescription ready, that sick feeling happened.
I ended up vomiting THREE times on their counter, right before they closed. The women were shocked and I kept apologizing, but I couldn’t stop.
I left with my prescription feeling ashamed and embarrassed, and also terrible that they had to clean it up before going home.
Image source: whatsherfacegirl, Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#31
I get really nervous during a pelvic exam, (I’m female).
At one time, I had this lovely doctor that told me that if I wanted to get my mind off of it to concentrate on wiggling my toes and it would help me not think about it. This totally works by the way!
So years later I have to find a new doctor. I’m on the table with my new doctor when I hear this coughing , “ehem”. Then I hear my doctor ask in a very uncomfortable voice, “Are you liking this or something?”
I look down in confused and then realize that I’m wiggling my toes just like I normally do, but that without this being my old doctor that this behaviour might seem strange. I quickly turn bright red and stammer out and explaination about why I’m doing it and how my previous doctor recommended I do it to distract myself.
The doctor just looked at me like I was a weirdo and then treated me coldly and like I was being a freak the rest of the appointment.
Needless to say I was really embarrassed and never went back.
Since then I’ve always made sure to pre-explain the whole toe wiggle thing to any new doctors I’ve had to go to keep any uncomfortable conversation from happening again. Luckily, no other doctor has acted weird about it and a few have even said that it was a good idea they’d share with other nervous patients.
Image source: Anniebanannimock2
#32
I was in pre-op for ankle reconstruction. I had some time, my girlfriend was bed side. We stroke up conversation with a nurse and my gf was showing off some recent vacay pics on her phone.
… one swipe too many and there in all its glory a pic of my face between my her legs… looked something like this ” o_o / /”
Nurse got up and walked away without a word, my gf frozen with horror. I just couldn’t stop laughing.
Image source: stainer
#33
You just haven’t lived until you’ve farted during a pap-smear.
Image source: 5foot3, Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#34
When I was a kid (like 8 or 9), I had to get a routine physical to participate in sports at school. My Dad took me. Everything went great until the Dr told my Dad he needed to get a urine sample. My Dad hands me the cup and tells me to go to the bathroom in the cup and bring it back to him. I, being a bit naive, did not know what urine was so I went into the bathroom and promptly [pooped] in the cup. My Dad was waiting for me near the front desk of the Dr’s office since we were leaving after turning in the cup. I proudly walked up, handed the cup to my Dad and said “Is this enough or should I go back and scoop up some more from the bowl?”. The nurse at the desk looks up and nearly spit her coffee all over my Dad. He set the cup on the desk and said “We are leaving now”. I didn’t understand what was wrong until that night when my Mom came into explain my mistake.
Image source: Steelejaxon, anıl ersavaş / unsplash (not the actual photo)
#35
Thankfully this was only slightly insulting, not horrifying. When I was maybe 18, I went into the doctor because I was experiencing some extreme nausea, among other things. He kept asking me if I could be pregnant, over and over.
“So, uh, could you possibly be pregnant? Maybe we should run a pregnancy test.”
“Pretty positive I’m not.”
“When was the last time you had sexual intercourse?”
“Uh… never?”
“NEVER?!” At this point he’s suddenly whipped around to face me from his clipboard. “Oh, hah, wow, that simplifies things a lot.”
Image source: super_good
#36
I made the mistake of moving over the holidays last year. I was emptying out my bedside dresser of clothes and whatnot…my top drawer had two large open boxes of condoms inside. I stuffed ribbons of protection into my pockets and left. Lo~~w~~ and behold, I’m in a major car accident on my way to the new house.
One short ambulance ride later, I’m in a private ER room with just a nurse, my girlfriend, and myself. My girlfriend had to remove my pants, and first, remove everything from them.
So there she is…glaring at me…as she pulls 30+ condoms from my pocket in front of the nurse. I swear, it looked like a magic trick…they just **wouldn’t stop coming**.
TL;DR – Remove condoms from pockets before car accidents.
Image source: superjew619
#37
I went for a routine smear – basically every woman has to get one every 3 years – they check your lady bits for anything unusual etc..
Before I begin I must point out that when I’m particularly nervous, I get wet.. (embarrassing, I know) but this is only just the beginning..
Well, while ‘down there’ the lady-doctor (who was a she-beast, I might add.. I think I spotted a ‘tashe..) noted to the nurse to write down that there was “an abnormal amount of fluid”. Marvellous.
Afterwards, when she was asking questions about sexual history, etc, all was going fine until the doc asked if I was on birth control. I, of course, had to say I wasn’t on any as I was a lesbian.
Her face dropped and mine was a luminous red.
**tl;dr – Big, scary doctor lady thought she’d turn me on during an examination**
EDIT: She was trying to push loads of birth control leaflets on me and explain what type of birth control would be best so I thought I’d save her the hassle by telling her there was no need as I was a lesbian. It was only as the words left my mouth that I remembered my apparent “abnormal amount of fluid” she had noted to the nurse about 10 mins before.
In the UK (the Isle of Man specifically) women only have to be tested every 3 years.
Image source: buttery_biscuit_bass
#38
It wasn’t embarrassing for me, but…
When I was a little kid (like 6-7) I used to bruise really easily.
So, one day my dad took me to the doctor (I forget why), and I had to take my shirt off, and my chest and arms were covered with bruises from top to bottom (I had been play-fighting with my brother the day before and he got the upper hand). Man, the doctor shot my dad the nastiest look I’ve ever seen.
Image source: Number127
#39
Happened to my dad, in fact he told this story again yesterday. He was going in for a vasectomy after I was conceived. (Just made it!) They shoot him with the numbing medication and the doctor didn’t wait long enough for it to take full effect. Did the first pinch and snip and the pain was so bad that he puked on the nurse in the room. The doctor decided to wait 10 minutes until he did the other one. Since this doctor wasn’t hi regular physician he told him that if he saw him out in a bar that he would beat him.
tl;dr My dad got his testicle snipped before it was numb so he puked on a nurse.
Image source: Chaserboy
#40
I was 3 minutes late for a doctor’s appointment. My mom works for an orthodontist, and I know the importance of being on time for appointments; but I had pulled over to vomit twice on my way to the doctor’s (for the ailment being treated) and that slowed me down.
When I arrived, I went to check in and I knew I would have to wait longer – I can’t just expect them to drop everything to see me. The [jerk] receptionist sees me walking in and loudly says “You’re late, Elsee28, the doctor will not be seeing you today” in front of about 10 other patients in the waiting room.
Everyone is staring at me at this point and I blinked back tears as I walked up to the counter and tried to explain and offered to sit and wait as long as possible and she refused.
Got in the car, drove myself to a walk-in clinic and have never returned to that doctor’s office again. Too bad, too; the doctor was really sweet but the old h*g at the front desk ensured I’d never return.
Image source: elsee28
#41
I was in the ER late at night having a what I thought was a heart attack, but turned out to be a gallbladder attack. After being led to a room and put into a bed, I told my wife I was going to be sick. She rolled a trashcan over to me and went to get a nurse.
The security guard looked in and say that I was leaning my head in to a trashcan and i guess thought he would help, so he handed me one of those little kidney shaped plastic trays to puke into. In my delirium, I shut the trashcan, and held up the little kidney bean. When I did barf, the puke expelled out of me with such force, it ricocheted out of the plastic tray, and all over the wall, floor and bed. All the blood drained from the guards face and I heard him apologizing to my wife as she was about to walk back in on the devastation.
The nurse didn’t bat an eye, but my wife was pissed that she had to sit in there with me and the pukey stench for a few hours, though I was blissfully unconscious.
Image source: thisiswhereistopped
#42
When the nurse took the needle out of my arm after drawing blood I accidentally flexed and shot a stream of blood 5 feet across the room all over some posters.
Image source: anon
#43
When I was about 7 years old, I had to go to the doctor for a severe case of poison ivy. I’d gone camping and one thing led to another and I somehow got it on my downstairs mix-up. So over the next couple days I’m obviously itching like hell, so I scratch frequently until everything down there resembles a Somalian gigolo, in size and color. My mom ends up taking me to my (very attractive) female doc and at first glance, she immediately leaves the room and returns with a number of med students. As she’s gingerly displaying my member in front of a gaggle of med students like she’s presenting a participation award in a bratwurst festival, this feeling of overwhelming guilt hits me and I start crying; standing up, pants at ankles, junk in doctor’s hand, crying. This is the story of my 7th birthday.
Image source: mphelp11
#44
I am always so late to the party! But here it goes;
Daughters 18 month check up.
She refused to nap all day, so when they poked her with needles she was extra cranky and wanted to get out of there. I’m rushing and being clumsy, have daughter in one hand and drop my keys. Go down to pick keys up and set daughter down for a second. Daughter is not having it, in an attempt to climb her way back up she grabbed my low cut t-shirt by the top along with the bra and proceeded to climb. I pick her up. Everyone is looking at me. My right breast is completely exposed. It took me a second to realize it….but all of the nurses, male pediatricians and a fellow mother and child got a good 4 second view.
**Tl Dr Daughter helped me flash pediatrician clinic.**.
Image source: meeeowzaa
#45
So I needed a physical, needless to say this is definitely one of the most awkward moments of any incoming freshman’s first ‘high school experiences’. I walk into the office do all the routine work ([urine] in a cup, weight, height etc) then the doctor comes in to check for a hernia, normal, so I pull down my pants and the doctor is ‘massaging’ my testicles and then he looks up at me and says “You know, you have extremely large [testicles] — I don’t think I have seen any this big in a very long time” then he continued to ‘check’ for a hernia for the next like 2 mins. Nothing in my life is awkward now because that takes the cake.
TL:DR Creepy doctor tells me I have huge balls and checks for a hernia for too long.
Image source: Ecluzi
#46
Went in for a regular OBGYN check up.
Doctor takes a look and says, “LOOKS LIKE WE’VE GOT ANOTHER BALD EAGLE!”.
Image source: ClassiestBondGirl311
#47
I put the gown on backwards and the attractive young male OBGYN had to rip it.
Image source: anon
#48
A few years ago, I had a [testicular] cancer scare. The dr was pretty sure it was nothing to worry about tu I had to get an ultrasound of my nut at the hospital to be sure.
I’m laying there with my sack exposed while a nurse uses an ultrasound wand to check things out. Twice during the procedure another nurse opens the door to ask a question of the tech that’s performing the ultrasound and stands in it, providing a full view of my sack to passers by in the hallway. She wasn’t inquiring about my procedure, she was asking stupid questions about the work schedule. Needless to say, I was embarassed and shocked.
When I heard the door open a third time, I told the nurse that if it opened again during my procedure I would be reporting it to the hospital admins. She did not return.
Image source: slang1272
#49
I had to give a urine sample, so cup in hand I walk to the bathroom, shut the door and proceed to pee into the cup as I have done before. Well, cups at the line, Pinched it up, moved cup and proceeded to empty bladder into the toilet. Well now my moment of terror, somewhere from getting the cup and getting to the bathroom I lost the cap. Panic sets in as I feverishly search for the cap only able to search my pockets with one hand, holding my uncapped cup of uncomfortably warm [urine] in the other.
However my desperate prayers to spaghetti monster went unanswered and could not find the cap I so desperately needed. So I opened the door and my walk of shame began. My embarrassment soon faded as it had turned into pure concentration, as all my years of walking with my bowl of cereal to the couch came flooding back to me. The constant re-adjustment watching the tides of my [urine] climb higher and higher up the wall of the cup. I made it back to the exam room, full cup of now froathe [urine] in hand, Victory.
My doctor comes in and startled asked where the cap is, I told him I lost it and had to walk back without it. He laughed and asked why I just didn’t set it down in the bathroom and ask for a cap…
Image source: anon
#50
I smoked a roach I found in my car one time before I went into the dentists office. I wasn’t too high, but a doctor walked in front of me and I noticed his arm was in a cast. Before I could stop myself I said “Sir? You broke your arm.” We both just stared.
Image source: SneakySnakies
#51
When i was about 12, i had my appendix out. The doctor had asked me to tell him, or a nurse, when i farted. I guess as a sign that my bowels were starting to wake up from the anaesthesia or whatever.
I woke up late at night and farted. I saw a guy in white and said “excuse me, i passed gas”. He said “ok… well… you should tell a nurse”, and continued mopping the floor.
Image source: chipnutley
#52
This happened to my roommate during his Freshman year at college. He had recently hooked up with this attractive but promiscuous member of the women’s swim team. A few days later he started to notice these little red bumps growing on his [private parts] so he decided to have it checked out by Student Health Services.
He got in there and the nurse told him to pull down his boxers and she immediately started to laugh. “Was this your first time shaving?”
TLDR; Roommate mistook razor burn for the herp.
Image source: rabaltera
#53
A few weeks after my vasectomy I had to bring in a sample to make sure I was all clear. Well, I guess I didn’t have the lid of the container screwed on right and when I put it on the receptionist’s desk it leaked out everywhere. I still have flashbacks of her terrified expression.
Image source: cakeaddict
#54
I was getting my yearly pap done and my doctor had to check my ovaries. So she sticks her hands up there and starts on my right one. Something I said made her laugh, and she says, “Oh, I’m sorry, I probably shouldn’t laugh at you while I’ve got you by the ovary.” And I thought it was so funny that I burst out laughing. I mean, not a little giggle, but a gut bursting laugh. And this makes my doctor laugh even more. This went on for a minute or so. The entire time, she literally had me by the ovary, her hand full up inside me. She still needed to check if things were all good and I was moving so much that she couldn’t get her hand out without risking hurting me. And then, every so often after that, I’d start to giggle again.
I could not get out of that office fast enough when everything was finished.
Image source: gneiss_lass
#55
During my last pap smear, I was handed a paper “coverlet” thing and then told to lie back on the table which was covered in the same paper material as the coverlet. It was a really hot summer day. My doctor keeps having to ask me to scooch forward, so of course, each time, I am rubbing on thin paper with my sticky, sweaty a*s. At the end, I stand up before she has even left the room, and the entire piece of table paper is just sticking to my entire backside with my sweat. The coverlet is sticking to my front. My doctor just turns to me awkwardly and says “Yeah..it’s a bit sticky in here, I guess..” and she left quickly. Ewww.
Image source: Relevant_Happiness
#56
Embarassing and awkward at the same time. I was 17 when i was diagnosed with polycystic ovarian syndrome i go into the gynecologist with my mom because she was the one paying the dr bills and she was worried as to what was up. The doctor was trying to use one of those intravaginal ultrasound wand things to get up in me to measure a cyst that was on my right ovary. He can’t get it in without me squealing in pain. Eventually he gives up, looks at my mom and says “at least you know your daughter is a virgin!”.
Image source: turtleontheceiling
#57
Had a physical where the doctor asked for me to drop the pants. I did it verrrry slowly then he just straight up grabbed my boxers and tugged them down. What made it worse was there was this creepy navy guy in the corner watching this whole thing go down. He does the cough check and then takes off his gloves and starts talking to me for about 7-8 minutes about protection, any other symptoms all while my boys are out in the open in an extremely air conditioned room. After he talks he just glances down at my junk and says, oh you can pull those up now.
Image source: bernanabears
#58
When being checked for a hernia the only proper thing to do is slowly pat the back of the doctors head…the awkward will take care of the rest.
Image source: functionoverform
#59
Every time i go and am unsure whether to sit in the chair in the corner or on top of the raised bench thing.
Image source: XxAWildAbraAppearsxX
#60
Last time I went for a pap smear, my doctor found it necessary to tell me I was fertile and currently ovulating and proceeded to show me my discharge and how it does the “string thing.”.
Image source: celinesci
#61
And here I am still mortified from having to get a very minor surgery done on my breast to remove a cyst – done by a male doctor. I feel much better.
Image source: NoApollonia
#62
This isn’t embarrassing so much as horrifying. One time I was at the OB/GYN for my yearly visit, and the nurse came in to do the pre-exam questions, and she’s looking through my chart and says “and I see here that you are pregnant” and my face just drops, and she was like “you didn’t know?” and I say “Umm, no!”. She asks me for my name again and says, “Oh, I grabbed the chart for the wrong Erin!”.
Image source: piedipo
#63
I peed while the gynecologist was giving me my check up. A full on waterfall.
Image source: cuddlebun
#64
Started my period during my pap smear.
Image source: thexica124
#65
I was 8+ months pregnant, my OBGYN brings a student in the exam room with him and inquires if it would be alright if the young man repeated his procedures. At this point so very many people had inspected my lady parts I give a shrug in agreement and look at my baby daddy for some unspoken “go figure” action. He’s looking devilish and pipes in “wait a minute here doc” (dramatic pause as every one looks…up) “if you get to bring a friend, why can’t I?” at the time I was mortified but they all had a good laugh and it’s probably the appointment that stands out the most.
Image source: Vadersbiotch
#66
SO when I was giving birth I felt like I had to pee constantly. Everyone brushed me off with “That’s from the contractions.” Not even thinking about the fact that since I was only allowed ice chips and water, I was drinking and chewing on ice constantly for over 12 hours by the time I was ready to start pushing. Put my legs in the stirrups, took a deep breath, pushed. It looked like a wave hit my nurse. She was soaked, her hair was wet. My pee was dripping off her chin. There was dead silence for a minute. My mom went “Well I guess she actually had to pee!” I got a different nurse, She hooked me up with a catheter and I almost filled the little kidney shaped dish. Until the baby finally shot out, she asked me every 10 minutes if I needed to pee again.
TLDR kept saying I needed to pee, started to push, soaked my nurse with a golden tsunami.
Image source: kirastorm
#67
My dad is a well-respected ob/gyn in my hometown. He delivered several of my friends, and when people hear my last name, they ask, “oh, are you related to Dr. so and so?”
As if that weren’t bad enough, during my senior year in high school, my french teacher blurted out, “Oh, kaitmeister!, I need to make an appointment with your dad!” in front of the whole class. Yeah. Really wanted to know that.
Image source: kaitmeister
#68
One time I went in for a physical. My doctor is kind of an odd guy and always makes strange comments but I’ve gotten used to it and we get along. Anyway, it gets to the part where he checks my [testicles].
“Cough.” he says.
I do.
While my frightened ballsack is in his hands he looks straight up into my eyes and says, “You know, you look like a Jonas Brother.”
I didn’t really know what to say so I asked which one but he didn’t know.
Image source: BANK12
#69
I went to the hospital when I was as teenager and my doctor was rather attractive. She had to check me for testicular cancer. The room was curtained off and my parents were waiting right on the other side, in earshot.
She was looking away when I pulled my pants down and she said, “Oh my god,” in an annoyed voice when she turned to find my junk out. I thought I had done something wrong and said sorry. As it turned out, my pork and beans hadn’t been what had annoyed her, it was that her beeper had gone off (I guess she had been extremely busy).
The story isn’t too embarrassing at face value, until you realize my parents could hear but not see this short exchange. I don’t want to imagine what they thought caused a pubescent teenager to have to apologize to a hot doctor examining his testicles.
Image source: anon
#70
I was at the emergency room because of some pain. Nurse is taking my info, whatever. She takes my drivers liscense and fails to note that it still says M on it. Later on, I explained the pain was in my testicles.
>Testicles
>>TESTICLES
It hit her like a bag of hammers. I’m trans. Scowling, she hastily rewrote my information and proceeded to be a huge [jerk] the rest of the time.
Image source: Calciber
#71
Had my first PAP about a year ago. Legs up in the stirrups, speculum is in…
Lady doctors’ head tilts to the side, “Oh! It’s backwards [my cervix].”.
Image source: ViralKira
#72
I have my bush shaved into the bat symbol in honor of TDKR and my doctor saw it and asked me why and how i shaved it like that.
Image source: Rmart7
#73
Not too embarrassing. I was working in the ER for trauma rotations and a guy in his early 20s came in with his mom. He had just gotten in a car accident and lost his ring finger. He was real upbeat about it in a way that’s rare with most civilians so I joked and said “hey bro well at least now you have a permanent shocker hand”. I totally forgot his mom was there.
Image source: Nihilistic1
Follow Us
