Desperate Housewives 6.22 “The Ballad of Booth” Recap

“To Be Continued…” That dreaded slap that appears at the end of your favorite show. We got that moniker at the end of last night’s Desperate Housewives and thank GOD that we only have to wait a week, because imagine if we had to wait the summer after last night’s cliffhanger… ANARCHY!!!

Well, I think the “anarchy” will come when The Vampire Diaries end this week, but I digress… On to the recap!

Susan’s Bullying Gets Her Nowhere

After looking over Mike’s bill and his income, Susan can’t figure out how Mike got so behind in his payments and is flabbergasted when he reveals that he didn’t charge half his clients. Hmmm… Mike, man, you need a come to Jesus talk. Mike claims that he can’t get the people to pay up now cause times are hard. Tough luck, kid. So Susan then thinks that she should be to one to play debt collector and use her knack of crying on cue to get the money. Well that little trick doesn’t work on the first person, so when the guy brushes off a plea about MJ’s health, Susan snaps and bullies the guy until he pays. Seeing that being forceful might work better, Susan applies this attitude to other clients until she rakes up all the dough they owed, even if they had to give her items to pay their debt. But Mike has bad news. The IRS has moved up their due date and they don’t have enough money to cover their debt. Susan thinks that bullying can get them an extension, but the IRS guy only adds more penalties to their debt. Facing an uncertain future, the Delfinos come up with one last solution pay off their debt. The house.

Susan tells the women her decision, but rejects their help when they reach for their checkbooks. She tells them that the move will be only temporary and that her new apartment will be close to MJ and Juanita’s school. Like Gaby says, we hope she keeps her word, because most people don’t make it back to Wisteria Lane. Sans Edie and Katherine that is…

Never Drink And Flap Your Lips…

Bree, Orson, and Andrew try to come up with a plan to get rid of Sam Allen. After roughing him up gets tossed out the window, Orson suggests that they fight with the checkbook, which Bree thinks is a wonderful idea. Andrew doesn’t, of course, and I don’t blame him. Once Bree meets with Sam and hands him a check in disguise of a trust fund that Rex should’ve left him, she tries to send the guy on his way. Sam doesn’t budge though, which prompts Bree to get a little cocky by saying he doesn’t belong there. So, Sam takes the check and rips it up, then tells Bree to try it again and she will wish she hadn’t. Kill this mofo!!!!!

Bree resorts to some threatening on her own by hiring former cops to politely scare Sam into shape, even dropping his address to let him know that they mean business. But Bree doesn’t count on Sam having some nuclear bomb type of info to hold against her and her family. See, Danielle’s lips got a little flappy when she got drunk during the introductory dinner that Bree threw for Sam in that she told Sam about Andrew’s past transgressions, most notably Andrew’s hit and run that later killed Mama Solis, Carlos’s mother, all the way back in season one. Remember that little faux pas? Well it has finally caught up to the van der Kamps in the form of blackmail as Sam wants Bree to sign EVERYTHING involving her company over to him to keep that secret buried. Sweet Lord, while I don’t condone hiding murderers, I will turn my head this once so that Sam can rot in hell!!! Please! Kill him!!!!

That Bomb Lasagna!!!

Angie awakes handcuffed to her bed to Patrick staring at her scare. After he makes a couple of threats and Angie calls his bluff, he finally reveals that he wants Angie to build another bomb for him. Is that all? Really? I mean there are bomb makers across the globe, dude. Sheesh. Angie refuses to do such a thing, but Patrick makes one more threat and she falls in line.

Meanwhile, Gaby is shocked to find out that Carlos hates her lasagna that she cooks him on his birthday every year, so she decides to ask Angie for a recipe. Patrick gives Angie a short amount of time to get rid of the boastingly chatty Gaby so Angie can complete the process of making the bomb. Angie give Gaby the recipe and sends her neighbor on their way.

Angie is sleep one night when someone enters the room and touches her. Thinking it is Patrick, she kicks the guy, but it turns out to be DANNY!!!! Before Angie can get the kid to leave the house, Patrick appears and ties his son up. Patrick tries to talk to Danny, who is ready to take Patrick out if he gets the chance. Patrick promises that Danny’s anger will redirected to the people who have lied to him for 20 years.

While Angie builds the bomb, Gaby shows up unannounced with a lasagna for Angie to try. Patrick stalls Gaby while Angie pretends to cut a piece of the lasagna in the kitchen. Then Angie gets an idea and quickly scribbles a note to Gaby and sticks it in the lasagna and sends it back with Gaby, who is clueless about the whole ordeal. When Gaby gets home, though, she tosses the lasagna away, thinking that Angie hated it.

In the middle of the night, Gaby enters the kitchen to find Juanita and Celia eating the lasagna. After scolding the girls for eating food out the trash can, she asks them how does it taste, which is when Celia spits out the note. Gaby reads it and balks. The note says, “Danny and I are held hostage. No cops. Get Nick.”


The Devil You Know…

Detectives Booth and Furst get a call about a dead body being found in the woods. The body? Irina’s.

Lynette takes it upon herself to reveal to Eddie about his mother’s disappearance. The crazed killer tells Lynette that is mom might be on a bender and will snap out of it soon. Lynette buys this, unfortunately.

The cops show up on the door step looking for Preston, who is camping with Porter, to discuss the note Irina had written to him and to question on other matters. Lynette and Tom are upset and shocked, while Eddie looks and listens from an upstairs bedroom. He panics and later bails, claiming to go take care of his mother. Lynette begs him to stay, but he declines and remarks that he’s not coming back. Lynette asks for a hug and the scene is both creepy and sad at the same time. Kudos to the writers, actors, and director (Larry Shaw) for their work on this scene.

Later at the police station, the detectives let Preston go when they confirm that he was out of the country during the time of the Fairview Strangler murders, which the police link Irina’s death to. Preston blames himself for Irina’s murder and the men leave to help Preston get his mind right. Lynette stays behind and overhears the cops mentioning that they found another body and this one being Barbara Orlorfsky.

Lynette panics and runs straight to Eddie’s house, where the kid is packing to skip town. Lynette bursts in to tell Eddie the news of what she heard, but before she can, Eddie lies about just talking to his mom on the phone and that she’s in Florida with an uncle. Lynette, for some strange reason, doesn’t put two and two together and only says that the police must’ve got the name wrong on the dead body they found. Eddie gets quiet and throws down his sack. Lynette finally gets the last puzzle piece, but it’s too late. Eddie locks the door and shuts the blinds, while we scream when “To Be Continued…” fades in on our TVs.

Damn you, Marc Cherry!!!

The Fairview Ledger

– Wow, wow, WOW!!!! The three psychos are on the loose and taking names! Wonder how each house wife will make it out alive? IF they make it out alive?

– So glad that they are revisiting the Mama Solis/Andrew’s hit and run storyline. When the show first came on, I wondered constantly if Andrew would get his just desserts, because at the time I HATED his ass!!!! But now… I’m on the fence and, like I said, I wouldn’t mind turning my head since it is Sam who has brought this old incident up. Sam needs to go. Pronto!

– Susan and Mike might lose their house? That’s got to hurt. Plus it can cause a lot of friction, which is not what the two sorta newlyweds need now.

– It’s been a long time that Desperate Housewives has made me cringe on my couch, but that’s exactly what I did when Lynette ws caught in Eddie’s trap. I m soooo scared about how this could affect her baby.

– Gaby better step her A-game up! She’s dealing with a mystery for once. Can she handle it??!?!

See you guys next week for the SEASON FINALE!!!!

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