Every workplace has its own special language—a collection of phrases that somehow migrate from boardroom to breakroom until they’re inescapable. These corporate catchphrases start innocently enough, often in management meetings or training sessions, before spreading through offices like a linguistic virus. Suddenly everyone is “circling back” and “touching base” while promising to give “110 percent.”
The initial meaning gets lost as these expressions become verbal fillers that somehow make simple ideas sound important. From the passive-aggressive “per my last email” to the eternally vague “let’s parking lot that idea,” these office expressions manage to simultaneously communicate very little while irritating almost everyone. This collection captures thirty of the most eye-roll-inducing phrases that continue to echo through cubicles and Zoom calls, proving that no matter how much the workplace changes, questionable corporate speak remains eternal.
#1
“Teamwork makes the dream work!”
Image source: zitping
#2
My current favorite word is “escalation”. As in “are you going to get that done by our commit date or do we need to escalate?” It’s corporate-speak for “I’m gonna tell my mommy.”
Image source: a_reluctant_texan
#3
When someone asks if I’m still “living the dream”, I quickly respond with, “nightmares count, right?”
Image source: iliketosnuggle
#4
“Not good with computers” that’s when you need to pipe up and say “I’m sorry to hear that, would you like me to organise some additional training with HR for you?”
Image source: Sue_Ridge_Here
#5
“On a go forward basis…”
Why can’t you just say, “In the future…”?
Image source: Sacamato
#6
“idk just make it really creative and make it pop”. gotta love being the only graphic designer.
Image source: byPCP
#7
“Working hard or hardly working?”
Image source: FootBa11
#8
“You should want to take on more responsibility to help out your work family. I understand that there’s only two of you doing three people’s worth of work, but we’re a family and family helps each other out.”
Not for 11 months family doesn’t. Especially when there’s not a raise involved.
Image source: reddit.com
#9
“Awesome sauce”.. I hope that I am the only one who has to deal with this.
Image source: SlugandPlug69
#10
“You look tired.”
Image source: reddit.com
#11
“Let’s touch base”
Image source: sab1432
#12
Whenever someone gets the weekend off everyone tells them “Must be Nice!”
Image source: CapThunder
#13
“Support the needs of the business”. Read as: “stay as late as we need you and forget about your life outside these walls.”
Image source: reddit.com
#14
“At the end of the day…”
“It is what it is”
“Let’s not try and reinvent the wheel”
“Minimum viable product”
“Can you do me a favor?” – It’s not a favor if you’re my boss and I don’t get a favor in return
Image source: cat-ninja
#15
“Would you mind doing . . . ?” Because you know that I don’t have the option to say no.
Image source: satosaison
#16
“How are you today?” “Oh, just another day in paradise!”
Stop.
Image source: shittyroastbeef
#17
I have one co-worker who without fail every single time I see him says “Having fun yet?” even if it’s only been about 10 minute since I saw him last
Image source: Rock0322
#18
Another day, another dollar.
I don’t even live in a county where the dollar is currency.
Image source: DaveoftheUniverse
#19
“Let’s take it offline”
Image source: GhostalMedia
#20
“One of the many ‘hats’ that I wear…”
Image source: HagmanPeace
#21
The guy who walks into a half-full bathroom. “Oh hey hey its a party in here!” It’s not.
Image source: reddit.com
#22
“Happy Pre-Friday”. Said today, just like every other Thursday.
Image source: Cobalt_Rebel
#23
When someone walks in the office and says something along the lines of, “Look at all you hackers.”
Haaa so funny. Very original. That’s the first time someones made that joke!
Image source: S16_Drummer
#24
“I understand what you’re saying, but I’m just not linking it”
Image source: Strev123
#25
The best subtle jab: “I’m surprised you didn’t know that! “
Image source: KaydenceRyerson
#26
“Thinking about how you shoulda stayed in school?” From the boss every time I do any menial task
Image source: chknnuggetqueen
#27
“Who’s who in the zoo?”
Image source: justtoseeyousmile
#28
“It looks like someone has a case of the Mondays”
Image source: reddit.com
#29
When I put a $10 bill in the change machine and the quarters come tumbling out slot-machine style, invariably some d*****s says “You hit the jackpot?”
Image source: chrisgond
#30
Once had a boss that would say “horse and pony show” (instead of dog and pony show).
eye twitching
Image source: LabKitty
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