Pretty Little Liars: Night of the Dumbest Moves

Love will make you do crazy things, but the young ladies of Pretty Little Liars took that sentiment to the next step last night by shooting themselves in the foot with their latest lame-brained schemes in the name of the ‘warm and fuzzies.’ A sigh doesn’t even begin to do justice for the disappointment I have in my Little Liars this week.

But that doesn’t mean the episode was not jaw-droppingly excellent.

While ‘A’ is circling them like flies drawn to a carcass, the Little Liars compounded their problems by ten by letting their emotions get in the way of executing their common sense skills when it came to deciphering between the matters of the heart and their safety. Let’s read down the charges brought against each girl one by one.

Emily

While Emily’s little faux pas was tame at best compared to her fellow Little Liars’ lapses in judgement, it still gained the unwanted attention of A. As soon as Emily revealed her plan to send herself a dummy letter, I knew A would eventually get their hands on it after Emily had a change of thought. However, the scene between Pam and Emily was a breath of fresh air for their storyline as it showed just how far both had come from their season one character arcs. Pam coming to the realization that Emily will forever be her baby no matter who Emily dates was rewarding not only for Emily, but the audience as well. I cheered when Emily ripped that fake letter, but I knew A wasn’t too far away to literally pick up the pieces and make Emily’s life a living hell by delivering the letter anyway. Still, Emily gave A something to work with when she really didn’t have to.

Verdict: A Slight Tap on the Wrist

Hanna

Our girl Hanna didn’t really have my head ringing with her storyline tonight, because she donated the majority of her time correcting her wrongs with Lucas. The friendly gesture, which involved Hanna hooking Lucas up with a girl named Danielle, was a well-thought out thank you on Hanna’s part, but when you look at the grand scheme of things the gesture seemed a bit disjointed.

I say that because of the situation going on between Mr. and Mrs. Marin, who seem to have put their differences aside, puzzling Hanna in the process. Ashley’s advice of people changing and not holding grudges seemed as if Hanna was going to try to really reconcile with Caleb, not Lucas, given that her father was the first man to ever hurt her and Caleb being the most recent one to do so as well.

Speaking of Hanna’s father, this is where her little common sense relapse kicked in. Seeing how much her parents are getting along, and knowing that things aren’t so peachy keen between Mr. Marin and his new lady, Hanna intercepts a message from Mr. Marin’s fiancée declaring her forgiveness and deletes it from her father’s phone. If A finds out about this one, then I will have no choice to think that they are a phantom of sorts, because that’s just crazy. As for Hanna’s actions, it will most definitely come back and take nice bite out of her ass.

Verdict: A Tap on the Back of Her Head

Aria

Man, man, man… Where do I begin? I’m so over Aria and Ezra that it’s not even funny. Why bother worrying if they get caught or not when they are holding hands on a college campus that not only has Ezra’s ex-fiancée walking the quads, but Aria’s dad as well? At this point, I want them to get ‘caught,’ because there is really no point in them hiding anymore since they are freely acting without a care in the world on the matter.

This brings me to Jenna, who just… confounds me when it comes to her ‘blindness,’ because how did she know that ‘Anita’ was still in the room? I know her hearing is top-notch, but damn…

Anyway, Aria’s inability to control herself around Ezra and blabbing out to Jenna that she was in fact Aria, after trying to hide the from the blind girl, had my eyes rolling double time at the screen last night.

Verdict: A Nice Smack on the Back of Her Head

Spencer

Hastings gets the “You Need Your Ass Kicked!” award of the night after taking Melissa’s wedding ring after trying to help her sister find it, pawning it and then taking the money to help pay for Toby’s new ride. If you don’t see what is wrong with this complete brain fart, let me count the ways for you: a) Melissa is completely unstable. She flip-flops between caring sister and deranged lunatic at the sound of a click and has it in for Spencer for fingering Ian as a murderer. So why would Spencer sell the thing that signified Melissa’s last shred of sanity? b) Spencer stealing to help Toby get out of Rosewood is not a bright move to make when most the town (including your folks) think you are a suspect in Ali’s death. Tone it down a little. 3) Did she forget ‘A’ is always looking for more blackmail insurance to include in their bag of tricks?

The list could go on all night, but what is she going to do about recovering that ring? Sure Melissa doesn’t have a clue where it actually is now, but come on? Spencer doesn’t need anymore crap on her plate at the moment, because it is on its way of tipping over and causing a huge mess.

Verdict: A Back Hand Slap. Because I Must.

Who’s Lurking Behind The Curtain?

Jason DiLaurentis really needs to take a class on Revenge Lying 101, because he was seriously dropping some dud fibs tonight that should’ve warranted some Toby snoopage to figure out what the hell the guy was hiding behind the curtain. Could it be Ian? If not, then who else could it possibly be? Whoever the person might be, they are bleeding a lot of blood and there is only one person who has recently been injured in some sort of way. Despite all that, I bet the writers will pull a back hand trick on us and the person who’s in the room will be someone we know already, but who we rarely see.

Random Thoughts

– How could the events from the premiere to last night’s episode take place in a week? Are the meds in Melissa’s medicine cabinet a little too much?

– WREN! What the hell does he have to do with all of this? And more importantly, why is he even putting up with Melissa after what happened last season? I’m intrigued (as are you) to find out what the hell type of medicine he’s giving to Melissa, and how he’s getting it. I thought we saw the last of him back in Season One, but I bet Spencer will be taking a trip to see what the hell he’s been up to and just what business he has with her sister of late.

– If I was the pawn shop keeper, I might’ve been more keen to give A three look-overs than I would Melissa. Anyone wearing black gloves and a hoodie in the middle of the day shouldn’t be trusted with anything.

– Could Ian and Jason had been blackmailing Allison when she was alive? It makes sense in some respects. It especially gives Ian a means to get close to her and strike when the time was right.

There are a lot of themes, questions and other aspects that we could try to decipher, but when it is all said and done, last night’s Pretty Little Liars was the Night of the Dumbest Moves.

Do you agree or disagree?