“It’s not what it looks like…” Those are probably the worst words someone can utter when they’ve just been caught with their pants down. Yet, so many cheaters have the audacity to say exactly that.
A woman’s world was turned upside down when she arrived home to find her sister and her husband naked in her kitchen. She was so shocked that she just walked out, got into her car and kept driving for miles. After overcoming her initial denial, the woman confronted her sibling. And what transpired has left netizens reeling.
She caught her husband and her sister naked in her kitchen
Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages / Envato (not the actual photo)
And just when she thought things couldn’t get any worse, they did
Image credits: lucigerma / Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: cheaterssuck12
Some felt she should cut both of them out of her life, while others advised her not to block their numbers
“Received a call from an unknown number”: Just when she thought things couldn’t get worse, they did…
Image credits: kitzstocker / Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Prostock-studio / Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: cheaterssuck12
People were shocked that her sister had instigated the entire thing
“Infidelity grows out of opportunity”: an expert’s take on ‘keep-it-in-the-family’ affairs
As sick and twisted as it may seem, some husbands do sleep with sisters-in-law, some wives jump into bed with brothers-in-law, and cousins, nieces, nephews, and even adult children get cozy with extended family members.
That’s because infidelity grows out of opportunity. Or at least, this is how some experts explain it. Marriage and family therapist Abe Kass says that the more exposure two people have to each other, the more risk there is of cheating.
“That exposure can be very limited for example, a glance of two strangers across a restaurant bar but often it arises from repeated contacts, over weeks, months, even years,” he explains.
While any form of infidelity can hurt like hell, it’s a double blow when it involves your spouse and a family member. It can also be that much harder to reconcile.
“The first, and most obvious special challenge that arises when the infidelity is all-in-the-family is that it’s much harder, if not impossible, for a cheater to cease all contact with his or her lover, since the romantic partner is a member of the extended family,” says Kass.
If you’re planning to work things out, be prepared to be triggered over and over again, possibly for the rest of your life. You’ll likely be bumping into your partner’s lover at many future family functions. Sometimes, advises Kass, it’s best to just make a clean break and end the marriage.
But what about the relative who betrayed you? Should you make amends or cut them out completely? That, say some experts, depends on what you want the end goal to be.
According to psychotherapist Dr. Dwayne Buckingham, as long as you harbor bitter and angry feelings towards the relative, it does not matter if you cut ties physically or financially because they will always be present in your psyche.
“Disowning someone does not always fix or address betrayal effectively. Healing from this situation and gaining insight about how to manage your sister will probably require a lot of prayer and professional counseling,” explains Buckingham, adding that sibling betrayal can feel like the world is ending.
He says that many people believe that blood is thicker than water. “This kind of thinking causes us to believe that relationships and loyalties within a family are the strongest and most important ones,” the expert notes.
However, he advises that you do what is best for you.
“Whatever decision you make, do so in the right state of mind,” Buckingham said. “If disowning your sister will help you heal and protect you from future harm, then do so.”
“Hope this is the update you were waiting for”: She later revealed that her life had changed quite a lot
Image credits: cheaterssuck12
“Better off without them”: People welcomed the woman’s update and praised her for doing the right thing
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