When we are kids, of course, we need our parents, but just because we grow up doesn’t mean that we turn into strangers, right? Unfortunately, there is no shortage of neglectful fathers and mothers, and it’s their children (young or adult) who suffer because of them.
Just like this daughter who can’t fathom the fact that her parents barely give her a second thought. What’s worse is that when she tries to invite them over or just wants to hang out with them, they heartlessly call her “needy”. Read on to find out how it’s slowly destroying her!
More info: Mumsnet
Not everyone is lucky enough to be born to parents who are actively involved in their lives
Image credits: Kampus Production / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The 28-year-old poster lived with her parents while pursuing her PhD, but after she moved out 6 months ago, they almost went radio silent
Image credits: itsallabitmuchx
Image credits: Sofia Alejandra / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Whenever she offers to meet them, they cruelly brush her off as being needy, and she feels that they have completely washed their hands of her
Image credits: itsallabitmuchx
Image credits: Edmond Dantès / Pexels (not the actual photo)
They are so unbothered that they literally have no clue what is happening in her life, and their behavior is breaking her heart
Image credits: itsallabitmuchx
Image credits: Julia M Cameron / Pexels (not the actual photo)
When she was growing up, they were the same, as her dad worked all the time, and her mom cared more about watching TV all day than he did her
Image credits: itsallabitmuchx
Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Although, she is well aware of the kind of people they are, she just can’t let it go of how disinterested they are in her life
Image credits: itsallabitmuchx
Despite their neglectful behavior, all she wants is a healthy relationship with them as she feels completely rejected and lonely
Today’s story is all about how the 28-year-old original poster (OP) feels terribly neglected by her parents. She didn’t have any income when she was working on her PhD for 3 years, so she stayed with them, and 6 months ago, she moved out. That’s when things got dramatic as they nearly forgot they have a daughter, and she just couldn’t believe how callous they were.
She is always the one who reaches out to them, and even then, they are barely interested in knowing about what’s happening in her life. They also quickly decline all her offers to just hang out on any day, and they have literally zero clue about what is really happening in her life. When she confronted her mom, the woman called her needy and asked why she wanted her parents!
Ouch, sounds pretty hurtful, right? Some days, she’s completely fine, but when she sees people her age speak about their parents, it just breaks her heart. OP also updated that things have been almost the same since she was a kid. They just provided her with the basic things, but never really showered her with love or care as parents are supposed to do, and this frustrates her.
All her dad ever did was work, while her mom just let life pass by as she sat and watched mind-numbing TV all day rather than care about her daughter. Although she knows what kind of people they are, sometimes, the poster just can’t handle their indifference toward her. The poor woman feels rejected and lonely, when all she wants is a healthy relationship with her parents!
Image credits: pvproductions / Freepik (not the actual photo)
“When someone grows up with emotionally neglectful parents, those who don’t show much affection, don’t listen, or just don’t ‘see’ them emotionally, it can have a pretty big impact. Kids might start feeling like they’re not good enough, their feelings don’t matter, or they’re just invisible,” explained Eden Lobo, a counselor and psychology professor Bored Panda interviewed.
She claimed that they might turn into perfectionists due to emotional neglect and constantly try to earn love or approval, even though it never really comes. Our expert also added that when these neglected folks are surrounded by people, they can still feel lonely. That’s because the people who were supposed to be there for them emotionally just weren’t.
We also conversed with Prof. Lobo about the impact it can have when negligence persists into adulthood, and she explained that this just keeps the wound open. She elaborated that a part of them keeps hoping that their parents will show up in a way they always wanted. However, when that doesn’t happen, it just reinforces the old pain, and life can turn into a vicious cycle for them, she added.
Lastly, Prof. Lobo advised, “In the end, they can’t really force their parents to bond with them, as a forced relationship never works. To heal, learning to validate themself, getting support from emotionally safe people, maybe working with a therapist, and setting healthy boundaries with their parents can all make a huge difference.”
I truly hope OP is able to move past their selfishness and love herself, don’t you think so, too? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below!
Netizens were quite baffled by her neglectful parents and didn’t shy away from calling out their toxic behavior
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