I have a friend who recently entered the dating game after being in a long term relationship for more than ten years. The stories this woman has told me are wild. From a man accusing her of catfishing him for not disclosing her race, to another expecting her to foot the entire bill and drive him home – on the first date. She’s seen and heard a lot. It appears she’s not alone. According to this Reddit thread, there’s no shortage of men behaving badly but believing they aren’t. Redditor RedemptionKingu racked up thousands of comments when they asked Women of Reddit: What’s one thing men do that they think is attractive, but actually isn’t?
The OP told Bored Panda they’d seen the question before directed at men. “I wanted to see what the answers would be like when I switch the genders,” they said. “There were lots of answers like ‘being an alpha male’ which didn’t surprise me, but some stories and anecdotes were interesting and surprising.” Keep scrolling for some of the worst things a man can do when trying to impress a woman. And don’t miss the chat we had with dating coach Blaine Anderson about how to improve your game.
#1
Support Trump (or any other politician who thinks they have authority over women’s bodies).
Image source: Comprehensive_Link67, Jonathan Meyer / pexels (not the actual photo)
#2
I can’t stand when a man looks at you and does like a little licking his lips thing that just grosses me out. You’re not sexy. It is nasty. stop.
Image source: DwightsJelloStapler, msvyatkovska / envato (not the actual photo)
#3
Talking about how sore i’m gonna be the next day. Some guys for some reason think they’re doing sex the best when they’re hurting their partner (outside of consensual kinks), and I don’t think that’s attractive or good.
Image source: KurlyKayla, Liza Summer / pexels (not the actual photo)
#4
When they aspire to be an “alpha male”.
Image source: crazycatlady331, Dinielle De Veyra / pexels (not the actual photo)
#5
When they give advice I didn’t ask for.
Image source: maria_the_robot, Vanessa Garcia / pexels (not the actual photo)
#6
Put down other men to try and elevate their image to me. It does the opposite to their desired effect.
Image source: Missgrumpy00, Andrea Piacquadio / pexels (not the actual photo)
#7
Wearing too much cologne, if I can smell you from across the room you’re doing it wrong! It should act as a small enhancer of your natural smell, so that *if* someone does get close to you they won’t have to hold their breath.
Image source: Myystic_Muse, Uva Rova
#8
When they think they’re being a gentleman but actually being possessive/controlling : ex. Ordering food for you without asking what you like, being randomly aggressive to other men for supposedly “looking at my woman”, critiquing woman’s outfit to cover you up when you go outside cus he doesn’t like other men looking.
Putting down other women aka “you’re not like other girls/my exes”.
Image source: bossamemucho, SHVETS production / pexels (not the actual photo)
#9
Send unsolicited pics.
Image source: Mistyam, Ketut Subiyanto / pexels (not the actual photo)
#10
Play mind games. The whole « treat her mean to keep her keen » thing is simply incredibly cruel and manipulative.
Image source: GenerativePotiron, SHVETS production / pexels (not the actual photo)
#11
I care more that your car is clean and you drive it safely than the make and model.
Image source: stolenfires
#12
On Tinder I see a bunch of guys list “whiskey” as their only interest. Not even a sentence, just the single word. I think they think it makes them look sophisticated, but it just makes them look insufferable.
Image source: houndsoflu, cottonbro studio / pexels (not the actual photo)
#13
Brag about how successful they are with women. It always comes across as desperate and not really believable.
Image source: winkstav, cottonbro studio / pexels (not the actual photo)
#14
Reckless driving with me in the car, especially when it’s MY car. It’s not showing off your skills, it’s giving me an anxiety attack.
Being (repeatedly) ultra competitive with mundane things, especially when I say I don’t want to compete.
Grabbing me when I’m in the middle of doing something, then just standing there, not helping.
Interpreting “being manly” as being unhygienic, and refusing to shower/groom because then it will wash off your “natural musk”. No, you’re a lazy f**k that smells.
Image source: 272027
#15
Listen to Joe Rogan or Elon musk.
Image source: SnooStrawberries620, Michael Burrows / pexels (not the actual photo)
#16
Sleeping with as many women as they possibly can while demanding his future wife be a virgin.
Image source: halimusicbish
#17
Unkind behavior. Things like negging, bragging, acting ‘dominant’. That just tells me that you’re an insecure, fake, and/or immoral person, which is a deal-breaker for me.
Image source: ACatFromCanada
#18
Revving their engines. Immediately turns me into the Sahara.
Image source: MulderItsMe99
#19
Bragging how they haven’t cheated on you. Like they need a medal… dude, it’s the expected minimum.
Image source: Whereareyouimsosorry, Alex Green / pexels (not the actual photo)
#20
Oversized pickups or extreme lift kits. Nothing says I’m insecure like taking up four parking spaces DAVE!
Image source: Diary_of_Zero
#21
Giving sexual compliments or compliments about certain body parts when they first meet you. Thanks, but sir…you are still a stranger, that’s just making me uncomfortable. Can we get to know each other first?
Image source: Modusoperandi40, William Fortunato / pexels (not the actual photo)
#22
Talk over people in a group and always try to be the loudest/most dominate person in conversation. It makes you look like a rude a*****e.
Image source: Liively_Lady
#23
Brag about their fantasies of committing acts of violence against those who have wronged him or me. Like, when I hear that, I don’t think “wow, what a brave and honorable man”, I think “wow, he enjoys brutality too much for me to be comfortable with him.”.
Image source: mrsmunsonbarnes, Timur Weber / pexels (not the actual photo)
#24
Hating their wives. It’s not funny or cute.
Image source: ZealousTea4213
#25
Going to the gym is his entire personality.
Image source: Farewell-muggles, Ketut Subiyanto / pexels (not the actual photo)
#26
There is this horribly uncomfortable thing that some do when they meet you & shake your hand & then one of their fingers will tickle your palm. OMG. Please, for the love of all that is holy, stop that s**t.
Image source: Julia_Sugarbaker123
#27
“You’re not like other women”
Instant nope.
Image source: HotShoulder3099, Arina Krasnikova / pexels (not the actual photo)
#28
Acting overly macho. Those that refuse to wash their butts because it makes them gay, the ones that hunt for sport, the ones that have to have the loudest and biggest trucks when they have absolutely no need for it, the ones that have to strut like a peacock to assert their dominance as alpha male. This is the fastest way for me to develop cob webs in my clam. I hate that and find it wildly unattractive.
I’ve met some men that are some of the toughest mofos sitting with my daughter in a friggin tutu, getting served tea, talking about how she wants to paint their nails and they’re as at home doing that as they are sparring with someone. If they cook, clean, play princess, you name it, and are still at home in their sexuality, THAT is guaranteed to make me “wifey material” any day of the week. That is the way that gets my motor running on all gears. Whatever they want, I will give, within reason.
Image source: NightRain518
#29
Brag about how good they are at sex.
Image source: pastelpinkwonderland
#30
Showing me pictures of the hot women they’ve dated.
Yeah this actually happened once.
Image source: Batticon, Samson Katt / pexels (not the actual photo)
#31
Showing off their car while endangering both our lives, I don’t care how fast your car is slow the hell down I want to live.
Image source: Regular_Tonight_7145
#32
Making fun of people and laughing with their friends abt it.
Image source: OutlandishnessWild
#33
Persistence to the degree it gets scary. If I don’t like you and I say no and you ask me again, sure, I’ll say no a second time and wave you off. But when you aggressively keep moving at me, physically following me, disbelieving me if I say I have a partner (regardless of whether or not I do)… nobody finds that s**t cute.Talking about screwing-up.
Going out on a date, it’s understandable a man would want to make it seem like he has it all (or most of it) together, and this is the tack a lot of guys take. But when a man is down to earth and can talk about the mistakes he’s made or errors he corrected with perspective, humility, and even humor, it really makes him stand out to me.
Someone who is relaxed and not afraid to screw-up a little bit is totally sexy, because it puts me at ease and makes me feel like I don’t have to be super perfect either and that he is likely to be more adventurous and forgiving.
Image source: Heavennly_Honey, Bethany Ferr / pexels (not the actual photo)
#34
Brag about how much money they make or what they own.
Image source: NitsirkLav
#35
I had one very attractive boyfriend who very much knew it and he would practically pose on the lounge waiting for compliments … it was so off putting
Plus he used my special moisturiser all the time (I only used it every now and then for special occasions) and when i finally used it again, it was almost run out… so I asked him and lied about it
I found him so unbelievably unattractive after getting to know him… he had pretty privilege for too long and it showed.
Image source: Connect_Fee1256
#36
Excess muscle- think bodybuilding big. It’s not much. It’s like plastic surgery on women.
Image source: Avocado-Toast-93
#37
Not showing emotions. Let me know when you’re sad/upset/mad about something.
Image source: SleepyNoosa
#38
They think being mean/roasting a girl makes them attractive.
Image source: Sudden_Look4826
#39
B***hing about their ex. Unattractive and a huge red flag. (HUGE red flag for either gender.).
Image source: Twiinkkle_Rose
#40
I’m really turned off by the guys who think of themselves as having “elite” taste in anything to the point where they like to state all of their opinions as if they’re objective facts—especially when these opinions always align with what is already critically acclaimed and not just their own unique tastes.
Image source: friendswithyourdog
#41
Like in the barbie movie, “play guitar at you”.
Image source: toss_it_out_tomorrow, Mẫnn Quang / pexels (not the actual photo)
#42
Talking about other women who are texting them/want to date them/into them.
Image source: MortishaTheCat, cottonbro studio / pexels (not the actual photo)
#43
When men pursue a harem of women on socials and think we can’t see it. Super cringy and low vibe.
Image source: smbhton618
#44
When men try to act tough or like their over someone/ something. It’s ok to be sad/cry/be affected by something emotionally. And no your not better than a waitress, garbage man, obese person, weak person, homeless person, ‘dumb’ person I could go on.
Image source: marie-curie-e
#45
S******g on my music/book/tv/movie taste
Talking s**t about other people to make themselves look better
Aggro for no reason or claiming someone disrespected them when they just had a different opinion or brought up something you did that hurt their feelings
Bragging about how much money they make. If I cared about money do you think I would have become a teacher? Like damn.
Negging. Once some random dude in the club asked me and my friend (who was an entirely different ethnicity) if we were sisters because we were both “so short” and then proceeded to say he only dates tall girls…I didn’t even try to initiate a conversation with you bro. You came over to us and immediately insulted us for no reason…and then asked for my number an hour later when we were leaving…he was like posted at the door looking for us or something because the club was super crowded and we ghosted him after saying we had to go to the bathroom.
Insisting I try something I already said no to.
Image source: girlinthegoldenboots
#46
Brag about the size of there package.. when who really cares….
Image source: True_Sail_842
#47
Bragging about how many girls they get. Most of the time they’re making it up as well. Hell even as a straight guy hearing another guy brag about that sort of thing makes me think he sees women as sex objects rather than people.
Image source: BunniesIzzy
#48
When guys try to show off money, when they ask for sexy pics/videos, when they send d pics, when they are mean to you or try to humble you aka negging, when they try to show off around certain women, All of those things are an instant turn off for me! None of that is attractive!!!
Image source: 90sItGurl
#49
When they brag about their accomplishments or about how “good” they are in bed 🚩🚩🚩.
Image source: Morgandra
#50
Sagging pants, licking lips a million times while talking.
Image source: No-Efficiency1032
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