When Titans Clash, the Debate Gets Dirty
It was inevitable that the question would arise, as fans have long theorized who would emerge victorious in a battle between Godzilla and Kong. While Kong put up a good fight, lasting longer against Godzilla than most opponents (except for King Ghidorah), he ultimately fell. However, he never bowed, and that’s worth noting. But now, we’re faced with a different kind of contest, one that veers away from the strengths and natural weapons of these titanic creatures and delves into a less-than-polite topic: who defecates the most?
Yes, this is the kind of discussion that arises when giant monsters take center stage. The epic battle between Godzilla and Kong was undoubtedly thrilling, but there’s one area where Godzilla can’t quite beat Kong, and it’s a contest the giant lizard probably wouldn’t even attempt.
King Kong: The King of… Waste?
As a colossal ape, Kong’s physiology and habits likely resemble those of his smaller counterparts. This means he eats, and therefore, he must defecate at some point. Apes typically do their business several times a day, and the amount they consume results in a significant amount of waste. Kong’s waste production would be measured in tons, making one wonder if we didn’t see any in Skull Island simply because the director didn’t consider it or deemed it too offensive.
If you thought the giant pile in Jurassic Park was impressive, Kong’s output would make that look like a mere dollop. While discussing this topic might be gross, it’s a natural bodily function, and animals in nature don’t seem to care. Kong would likely go wherever he happens to be at the moment. Godzilla, on the other hand, being a reptile, wouldn’t relieve himself as often. This leads to the conclusion that Kong would produce more waste with greater frequency.
Godzilla’s Waste: A Slippery Subject
Quantifying Godzilla’s waste is a bit trickier. Given his diet and typical location when nature calls, his excrement might resemble a massive oil slick. This is due to the digestive processes in his body, as observed in various reptiles. Imagine encountering such a sight in the middle of the ocean! The amount of waste produced depends on diet, location, and the inner workings of each titan’s waste disposal system, as mammals and reptiles differ in this regard.
Ultimately, Kong would claim the title of number one defecator, as his frequency and sheer volume would easily surpass Godzilla’s. The tons of waste Kong produces would outstrip Godzilla’s without much effort. However, discussing this topic is undoubtedly one of the strangest things we’ve done in a while, especially considering the bizarre subjects that often arise in pop culture.
A Humorous, Yet Curious, Debate
It’s amusing to think about someone sitting down to figure out this peculiar question, but it also raises curiosity about the person’s life and sense of humor. Having a sense of humor is essential for maintaining sanity, but sometimes, one has to wonder who comes up with these ideas. Someone actually thought of this and conducted the research. While it may be an odd topic, it’s a testament to the passion and creativity of fans who continue to find new ways to engage with their favorite cinematic universes.
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