When conversations with your partner become scarce or superficial, intimacy plummets. That’s a fact. Intimacy is so misunderstood because it’s usually defined in purely physical terms. But we should never forget it’s also mental, emotional, and spiritual.
“Communication is key” is not just the mantra of some relationship gurus. It’s an important lesson: every strong relationship is built on solid communication.
We know relationships are hard work, and it’s easy to let life get in the way of working on them. That’s why keeping the lines of communication open with your partner is essential to simplify things for both of you.
But sometimes, you don’t know what to say or how to say it, and you’re too afraid to make a mistake. That’s why we’ve compiled a list of questions for couples that will help you get to know your partner better so you can work together on building a lasting relationship.
Scroll down and take a look: you’ll see they’re all great conversation starters that will immediately make you feel closer to each other and allow you to see more clearly the direction your mutual commitment is taking.
Consider these relationship questions the perfect addition to date night, like small, insightful conversation starters for couples who want to spark deeper and more meaningful talks. You won’t regret it!
#1
How many times have you been in love?
#2
What does a successful relationship look like?
#3
What’s your favorite way to receive love?
#4
What are some of your deepest fears?
#5
What makes you feel most loved?
#6
What’s something you used to believe about relationships but no longer do?
#7
What was your dream job when you were a kid?
#8
Was there an embarrassing fashion moment in your adolescence?
#9
Have you ever been cheated on?
#10
What’s the first thing you noticed about me?
#11
How do you hide anger when you don’t want it to show?
#12
What activity makes you feel the most joyful when you’re doing it?
#13
Do you remember your dreams when you wake up?
#14
Who is more likely to survive the Hunger Games—me or you?
#15
What’s something you could talk about for hours?
#16
How do you usually spend your weekends?
#17
What role does family play in your life?
#18
Do you have any fantasies you’d like to try?
#19
What is your love language or how do you like to give love?
#20
What was the biggest lesson from your worst breakup?
#21
Would you rather be loved, respected, or admired?
#22
When did you first want to kiss me?
#23
How valuable is communication to you?
#24
What’s something you didn’t do in your previous relationship(s) that you want to start doing in our relationship?
#25
Are there any boundaries of yours I have crossed that I might not know about?
#26
Why did your last relationship end?
#27
What’s something you want to know about me that you haven’t asked?
#28
Who was your first crush, and what were they like?
#29
Can you describe what your first heartbreak was like?
#30
What’s your favorite meal now?
#31
What do you think is your best quality?
#32
Have you ever cheated on someone?
#33
Who is more inclined to be jealous, you or me?
#34
Is there a personality trait that always ticks you off?
#35
How do you talk yourself down from anger or frustration?
#36
Who is more of a risk-taker — you or me?
#37
What’s your dream vacation?
#38
What’s your favorite thing about our relationship?
#39
What’s something you’d like for us to try?
#40
Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?
#41
What animal would you choose to be in another life?
#42
Do you believe in reincarnation?
#43
Have you ever been in a physical fight?
#44
Do you think there’s such a thing as a “harmless” lie?
#45
Is there a place you love that you’d like to show me one day?
#46
Do you believe in love at first sight?
#47
What was your first impression of me?
#48
What are you like in your friend group?
#49
What does an ideal date night look like for you?
#50
What are some of your biggest turn ons and turn offs?
#51
Is there anything you’re unwilling to compromise on in life?
#52
Would you consider yourself to be romantic?
#53
Would you be willing to try long-distance if something happened that would require me to move far away?
#54
How do you handle your emotions when you get upset?
#55
Do you enjoy holding hands and PDA in general?
#56
Can you picture our family and friends integrating?
#57
What will you do to keep the spark alive in our relationship?
#58
Would you ever be open to couples therapy if we needed it in the future?
#59
What was it like for you growing up?
#60
What are you most proud of so far?
#61
What do you think is the meaning of life?
#62
Do I have any quirks that are getting on your nerves?
#63
Were you “popular” in high school?
#64
What’s your definition of romance?
#65
Do you see yourself having kids? If so, how many?
#66
If you believe in soul mates, do you think you’ve met yours?
#67
Do you believe in God?
#68
Is going to church or another house of worship important to you?
#69
Do you think it’s more important to be smart or to be kind?
#70
Does your family have any traditions?
#71
Would you want to create any traditions in your family going forward?
#72
What qualities or character traits do you want to work on?
#73
What’s one of my best qualities?
#74
Do you think infidelity is always a deal breaker, no matter what?
#75
Who is more trusting, you or me?
#76
What’s the first thing you found attractive about me?
#77
Where would be your ideal place — or places — to live?
#78
Would you rather own a home you don’t love or rent one you love?
#79
Would you rather be an amazing singer or an incredible dancer?
#80
What would you do with your life if you suddenly became a billionaire?
#81
Do you think there’s such a thing as luck, or do we create our own outcomes?
#82
Do you ever dream about me?
#83
How old were you when you stopped believing in the tooth fairy?
#84
How old were you when you stopped believing in Santa?
#85
Would you rather be a vampire or a werewolf?
#86
Who was your first celebrity crush?
#87
Who’s your “hall pass” celebrity crush today?
#88
Which musical artist would you want me to commission a love song from?
#89
Which song describes our love story best?
#90
If you had the option to live forever, would you choose to?
#91
What’s a song you could sing by heart to me, right now?
#92
Do you believe in astrological compatibility?
#93
Do you consider yourself good with money?
#94
What’s the worst trip you’ve ever taken?
#95
Would you rather live in only hot weather forever or only cold weather?
#96
Do you have a personal flaw you’d fix, if you could?
#97
What’s a goal you’re working towards right now?
#98
What’s a goal you’re working towards right now?
#99
How do you define cheating?
#100
Do you like to be cuddled, hugged, and kissed?
#101
Do you see us settling long-term?
#102
What’s something you will never give up or change for me?
#103
Could you picture yourself waking up next to me for the rest of your life?
#104
What do you want your life to look like when you retire?
#105
What’s your happiest memory?
#106
In what ways have you changed in the past 10 years?
#107
How did you feel about yourself in high school?
#108
What’s your favorite thing to have for dinner?
#109
What’s your favorite fast food restaurant?
#110
What’s one thing you would say to your younger self?
#111
What do you like most about our relationship?
#112
What do you think is the key to a healthy relationship?
#113
What is something you want to do together that we haven’t?
#114
Are you satisfied with our chemistry and intimacy?
#115
What was your favorite food growing up?
#116
How does your life compare to how you imagined it growing up?
#117
What do you find most attractive about me?
#118
Do you have a bucket list?
#119
If you had a bucket list, what would be on it?
#120
What’s something you’d like to try doing but haven’t worked up the nerve to yet?
#121
What superpower do you wish you could have?
#122
Who is more generous, you or me?
#123
What’s something you wish we did together more often?
#124
Who is more likely to live through a zombie attack?
#125
What historical era would you most, and least, want to go to?
#126
Who is your favorite couple in pop culture?
#127
Which of us is a better driver?
#128
Is there a song that makes you think of me?
#129
What animal do you think I’d be?
#130
Do you think people can really have psychic abilities?
#131
What’s your favorite movie of all time?
#132
Do you like to be surprised?
#133
Is there anything you’ve always wondered about me but have hesitated to ask?
#134
What’s the most thoughtful thing you’ve ever done for another person?
#135
What are your views on therapy?
#136
Where do you see yourself living in five years?
#137
Who did you look up to when you were younger?
#138
Who in your life has shaped you the most?
#139
What’s the biggest lesson you’ve learned so far in life?
#140
What was your biggest mistake?
#141
When was your first relationship?
#142
Did you ever fail at reaching a goal?
#143
What’s one thing you’d like to tell your family, friends, or an ex?
#144
When was the last time you cried?
#145
Are there any conflicts that we’ve had in the past that you don’t feel are wholly resolved yet?
#146
What’s something surprising that you were afraid of as a child?
#147
What was the first album you ever owned?
#148
What was your favorite school subject growing up?
#149
Which of us has a better sense of direction?
#150
Do you think of yourself as an optimist or a pessimist?
#151
Do you believe in ghosts?
#152
Is there a personal goal you’d like to achieve in the next five years or so?
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