No matter how much we talk about equality between men and women, oftentimes stressing how much has already been achieved over decades of hard work, it seems that there are a lot of things that still need to be done, and extensive changes implemented. The problem of double standards between men and women is not that hard to notice, especially in some common everyday life occurrences. Having this in mind, Reddit user @u/killywayx decided to ask people “What is something that is considered ‘normal’ for a man to do, but if a woman does it then they will receive backlash?”.
The question that received 30.5k upvotes and 15k answers showed that no matter how modern our society is, it is still full of old and entrenched behaviors. Some of the examples included things that are related to looks: women not being able to take off their t-shirt while for men it’s quite a normal thing to do, or having to constantly take care of body hair so you won’t be considered messy and neglectful, although for men, it’s not a problem. Some examples also touched upon social issues such as women who don’t want to have kids receiving quite a lot of backlash, whereas it becomes understandable when men don’t want a family. When it comes to career, women who are strong leaders and value proper work ethics are considered cold and emotionless, while men who have the same traits are seen as respectable bosses.
What are some of the things that you have noticed to be considered normal for men but don’t apply to women? Don’t forget to leave your thoughts in the comments down below!
More Info: Reddit
#1
Have an angry reaction. If it’s a woman WAY too many people assume it’s PMS or an overreaction.
Image source: GenesisNoelle, Anna Tarazevich
#2
Not all of these will apply to everyone or every circumstance, but I think that most of these are fair.
1. Asking a guy out or asking a guy to marry you. It’s seen as pushy or impatient and frowned upon.
2. Going hiking alone. People don’t tend to raise their eyebrows at a man roughing it in the wilderness, but it’s seen as reckless or dangerous if a girl does it.
3. Being assertive, standing up for yourself, and being confrontational. A lot of times it’s seen as rude when it’s seriously just somebody standing up for themselves.
4. Eating large portions of food. If a woman (even a skinny and fit one) is at an event she enjoys and fills a plate with junk food, it tends to raise a few eyebrows. It’s considered unladylike. When a guy does it, it’s viewed as normal and healthy appetite.
5. Dealing with grief. When a guy doesn’t cry, it’s stoic. When a woman doesn’t cry, it’s cold and unhealthy.
6. Caring little about appearance. If a guy goes a few days without shaving and has some stubble, it isn’t frowned upon very much. If a girl goes without shaving her legs it’s disgusting.
7. Masculime interests. A guy can like cars and video games and sports without question. But if a girl likes those things, it’s “because she wants a guy” or “she’s faking it” and she has to prove her worth and knowledge.
8. I know it’s been said a lot, but sleeping around. It really is a very high double standard. It seems like the pressure is usually placed on women to be the defenders of sexuality. But sometimes we want to get down and dirty too. And I don’t think anyone should be shamed for that — male or female.
That said, I do think that men face a lot of backlash and hardships as well, especially for doing things that normal women do like being alone with children, having open emotions, caring about appearance a lot, etc. I do think women face backlash, even sometimes for behaving like a stereotypical woman (having strong emotions, wearing makeup, wanting to show some skin…) At the end of the day, a little bit of understanding goes a long way. :) Let’s all be kind to everyone around us! :)
Image source: CC_Sierra, Brady Knoll
#3
Having body hair
Image source: Dry-Discussion-6004, Karolina Grabowska
#4
Calling it “babysitting” when watching their own children
Image source: koreamax, Lisa Fotios
#5
Walk around and be treated fairly in Iran.
Image source: frogjockie, Photo RNW.org
#6
Age, gain weight, fart, be sexually active, raise her voice, don’t tolerate being interrupted,…
Image source: Dooshbaguette, Mike Finn
#7
Not wanting kids.
When a man is good with kids and/or wants kids some day, he is called “a catch” (you know, in combination with other good traits), meaning that the opposite (not being good with kids and/or not wanting kids some day) is common and normal, but not great.
A woman who does not want kids or is awkward with kids is seen with an unkind eye.
Image source: ChibiSailorMercury, Eric Lewis
#8
Keep their last name after marriage.
Image source: imnotyourproblemyet, Chris
#9
Not being you child’s primary care giver. Normal for a dad. Failure for a mum.
Image source: Ellie_A_K, Rulo Davila
#10
Shave your hair off.
Image source: Regular_Estimate_511, Tim Gouw
#11
driving an 18 wheeler…. they s**t when i get out…..it is just a truck…..i can drive a semi, too
Image source: Queenofhackenwack, Gheysen86
#12
a) having sex
b) not having sex
c) smiling and laughing a lot
d) not smiling and laughing “enough”
e) not knowing how to cook
f) not doing house chores
g) having kids and having a career at the same time
Image source: 0_0moon0_0, dreamponderCreate
#13
Being old
Image source: DDJello, Edu Carvalho
#14
Normal bodily functions
Image source: kanyesweenie, history-art-photos
#15
Make reasonable complaints
Image source: Drdreonthemicrophone, joey zanotti
#16
Not wanting marriage
Image source: GoldenGlitter9, wetwebwork
#17
Being assertive. Assertive women seen as ‘dominating’ and ‘intimidating,’ but assertive men are seen as ‘having incredible leadership skill’ and ‘confident and self-assured’ (Know this by comparing my teacher’s commentary on my leadership skills versus my male friend who did the exactly the same)
Image source: theVastlycreative, SuckTheButton
#18
Be fat/chubby. Fat men= the funny friend. Fat woman= the ugly friend. Not fair tbh
Image source: CrispSandwichMuncher, Tony Alter
#19
Break up and leave the kids. Only get kids 4 days a month.
Image source: Urmom_731, cottonbro
#20
Ambition of any sort which does not involve having kids.
Image source: lyraleo135, Andrea Piacquadio
#21
Be angry
Image source: LatterBlood, Andrea Piacquadio
#22
Going out alone at night.
Image source: 16115121522, PNW Production
#23
Take their shirt off.
Image source: Dheadghead, Virginia State Parks
#24
Say “No”.
Image source: Dorothyya
#25
Walk out on their wife and kid. I know many men that have left their partners and their children. Barely visit their kids, make very little effort. No one really judges them that harshly for it.
But could you imagine if a woman walked out on her husband and children? Absolute monster.
Image source: magicfishfriend, joey zanotti
#26
Refusing to pick up your kid from school because “you’re at work”
Image source: lawfullawful, Ken Mayer
#27
Voicing an unpopular opinion or offering constructive criticism in (too many) professional settings.
Image source: Msrow91, turodrique fuad
#28
Grow a mustache.
Image source: bonster85, .jocelyn.
#29
Have a child whilst also having a job.
Edit: I was actually referring to the stealth demotions and firings, denied promotions, etc, but as people have pointed out, yes there’s mom shaming too
Image source: AlterEdward, Ketut Subiyanto
#30
Sit the Iron Throne
Image source: ohkas, Matt Brown
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