Many parents wouldn’t dare admit if they had a favorite child. It could cause all sorts of unnecessary family drama. But one woman has thrown caution to the wind and told the world that she likes one of her daughters more than the other.
The mother says she’s at her wits end after her youngest daughter started becoming “woke” and argumentative. The teenager is apparently driving her mom up the wall with her activism and “self-righteous policing.” The woman has now turned to the internet to ask how she can get along better with her child, and stop playing favorites.
There’s an expectation that parents love each of their children equally
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But one mom is struggling to even like her youngest daughter right now and can’t hide it
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People came forward with loads of advice for the mom
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The mom gave an interesting update after implementing the advice she’d received from netizens
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“Mirror, mirror on the wall. Who is the fairest of them all?”: what the latest research says about favoritism
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Even the most loving families can be quietly divided by favoritism. Though, if you ever ask them, they would likely deny it.
Many parents aren’t deliberately ranking their kids. It’s more a matter of responding to different personality types, shared interests, or behaviors that align with their own expectations. And there are loads of ways parents can show favoritism, sometimes without even realizing it: How they interact with their children, how much money they spend on them, how much time they spend with them, and how much control they exert over them.
A team of researchers recently conducted a meta-analysis of 30 studies involving nearly 20,000 participants. They wanted to find out which children were more likely to be on the receiving end of favoritism from their parents.
They examined how birth order, gender, temperament and personality traits (extraversion, agreeableness, openness, conscientiousness and neuroticism) were linked to parental favoritism.
“The researchers initially thought that mothers would tend to favor daughters and fathers would favor sons,” reports the American Psychological Association (APA). “However, the study found that both mothers and fathers were more likely to favor daughters.”
The team also found that children who were more agreeable or conscientious tended to receive more positive treatment.
According to lead author Alexander Jensen, PhD, an associate professor at Brigham Young University, siblings who received less favored treatment tended to have poorer mental health and more strained family relationships.
“Understanding these nuances can help parents and clinicians recognize potentially damaging family patterns,” he said. “It is crucial to ensure all children feel loved and supported.”
The research showed that parents were more likely to give older siblings greater autonomy. This could be because they were more mature.
Jensen has a message for anyone who feels there’s some favoritism at play in their family:
“The next time you’re left wondering whether your sibling is the golden child, remember there is likely more going on behind the scenes than just a preference for the eldest or youngest,” Jensen says. “It might be about responsibility, temperament or just how easy or hard you are to deal with.”
People praised the woman for being “an amazing mother”
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