Mob Wives Season 2: The Spa-nish Inquisition

mob wivesThe party is a time honored tradition in the world of reality show wives. Though most of us associate a social gathering like that with laughs, awkward dancing, and lots (and lots) of liquor, the reality party tends to be where stuff goes down and the tea, so to speak, gets spilled. Many a get-together has gone from a seemingly innocent gathering of co-stars/friends/frenemies to a full on battle royale, with no drink, chair, or bottle safe from being chucked toward another person. You’d think that having that many people around would make you think twice about setting things off, but if there’s one thing that reality shows like Mob Wives are known for, it’s defying social mores…oh, and setting things off.

It shouldn’t come as a shock, then, that Karen’s “spa party” turned into a hot mess before Big Ang’s spray tan had time to dry. We’ve already had Renee’s birthday party go up in flames earlier this season on Mob Wives and while the spa party didn’t put anyone’s life in danger, it still had plenty of moments that you thought things could get jumped off, as well as obvious implications going forward.

For one, didn’t it seem kind of fishy that the girl doing the spray tans was somebody Carla fell out with in the past? Obviously in an area like Staten Island, most people know each other and you can barely cough without hitting somebody who knows somebody who knows somebody, but if the spa day was supposed to be a clean slate type of event, why bring that type of negativity to things? And Karen/Ramona’s fake “let’s call Carla and get her over here” deal proved that they were out for blood, as they couldn’t leave well enough alone and enjoy a quiet day with Renee and Ang. They had to instigate something, which Renee quickly squashed and for that, I am thankful. Renee’s had a tough season and continues to put every other person in her life before herself, but checking Ramona and making sure there wasn’t another fight between the other girls was a way to keep the peace in her peer group and stand up for herself in the process. Plus, with Ramona’s nasty comments about Junior a couple of weeks ago, Renee could get out a little aggression in her words and really make sure Ramona knew that she was not the chick to be messing with at the moment.

I mean, it didn’t stop Ramona from getting in touch with Carla later, but oddly, that conversation went, dare I say it, well? Well, ‘well’ in the Mob Wives world means nobody got hurt or called each other names, but at this point, you can take what little bits of civility you can get. I still don’t get the “Drita controls Carla’s mind” line of thinking that the Wonder Twins have been harping on lately; if anything, Karen and Ramona have that type of dynamic going on, in that they both influence each other to think a certain way. Karen’s already shown to have a really selective memory when it comes to altercations with the other ladies and considering the amount of time she spends with Ramona, her opinions are bound to bleed over into Ramona’s consciousness. Ramona seems to be a really tightly wound person looking for a fight, so if her “cousin” keeps feeding her information about how Drita did this and Carla did that, I can see her taking the lead from that. She’s already believed rumors/innuendo when it comes to things Carla allegedly said, so it’s not that far fetched for her to be “controlled” by things Karen said and not get, y’know, the other side of the story.

Amidst all the screaming and scheming, though, the episode hit us with a lengthy dose of reality that really put the rest of the episode in perspective. Mob Wives has never been shy about showing the darker side of being a mob wife, the loneliness that comes from doing a bid with someone, the fear that at any point the one you love will be taken away. They’re still a reality show, so it can’t spend too much time in the sadness, but tonight we got a double dose of it with Renee’s continued depression and Drita informing her daughter that she was getting a divorce from Lee. Both have been minor subplots of Mob Wives season 2, but they got the opening slot on Sunday’s episode, delivering a rather sobering look at the important things these women are going through. Social dynamics and all the silly drama that Renee, Drita, Karen, Ramona, Carla, and Big Ang go through on a weekly basis is nothing compared to heavy topics like divorce and depression. The drama is a good distraction for them (and us), but Mob Wives never lets it go too far before snapping everybody back to reality with a reminder that this all may be fun, but there are serious consequences to mob life.

I mean, if you weren’t saddened by Aleeya talking about a family vacation or Junior telling Renee to take care of herself first, I’m convinced you’re made of stone. No doubt in my mind.

Going into next week, the lines between the Mob Wives have gotten a little more wobbly. Drita and Karamona still need to be kept far, far away from one another, but Renee and Carla are wafting somewhere in the immense gray area between them. Though I’d classify Carla as still Team Drita, her newfound civility/cordiality toward Ramona may bring a little tension to the friendship that’s had the least amount of tension in two seasons of Mob Wives. Renee, on the other hand, may not make a choice after all, considering how the drama has been tearing her up and how the more important parts of her life have been falling in around her lately. I assumed that we’d have to wait before having Renee inevitably pick a “team”, but the last couple of episodes have hinted that Renee is so over everything that she’d rather wash her hands of it and join Big Ang in the neutral corner. We’re only about halfway through the Mob Wives season, so there’s still time for the tide to change, but it looks like the hysterics have pushed one of the Queen Bees just a little too far.

Thoughts, Quotes, & Observations:
-“Accuprecture?”
-“If I can’t have sex, I might as well have a spa party.”
-“Everybody’s all discombobulated. Didn’t faze me at all.”
-“Oh, you don’t gotta put yourself with sh-t because of me.”
-“Forget it, I’m having a heart attack.”
-“I will knock you out like Mayweather did Ortiz.”
-“I blew up cars because I was pissed.”
-“Like, for real, for real…whoo.”
-Drita’s line about the bodega man knowing her business was cute.
-Ramona apparently likes to scream at children/her children. Sweet adult-ing.
-Big Ang getting the hell out of the spa party before things jumped off was, like her talking heads tonight, perfection.
-Big Ang appeared on Jimmy Kimmel Live! recently and talked about dating wiseguys.
-Here’s a little bit of Carla’s interview with VH1’s Morning Buzz.
-You want to hear an audio excerpt from Karen’s book “Mob Daughter: The Mafia, Sammy the Bull Gravano, and Me”? Here ya go. Families of Gravano’s victims are currently coming after the royalties.
Mob Wives 2: The Christening. No, really.
MC Drita in the house.
-The University of Tampa’s Minaret argues that Mob Wives peddles stereotypes. Do you agree?
-Here’s an interview with Ramona from VH1’s Morning Buzz where she impersonates Big Ang and talks about being on reality TV for the first time.
-Renee says that she won’t ever forgive Junior for “betraying” her family.
-Next week on Mob Wives: Karen’s getting her book ready, Ramona still hates Drita, Drita’s trippin’ over Carla talking to Ramona, and Renee’s relationship with Junior gets a little rockier.

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  1. Shay
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