It’s that time of the year again. The leaves are falling, the nights are getting colder and shorter, and you’re snuggling up with a pumpkin spice latte, scrolling funny relationship memes as you mull over weird signs he’s in love with you.
And then, there’s him. On the other side of the couch, nestled in his own blanket. Handsome, sweet, and dripping with that weird charm that makes him such a sweet and funny boyfriend. You’ve been dating for a long time, and you’re oh so in love. And suddenly, as you lock eyes, those things — the leaves, the fresh nights, even your pumpkin spice latte — don’t make your heart flutter as hard as he does.
It could be the butterflies in your stomach talking, but you’re sure he’s the one. But what about him? Does he feel the same way? How do you tell if he loves you? Are there any signs he’s madly in love with you?
Sometimes it can be hard to tell if a man is falling for you or not — especially when he’s hesitant to say it to you directly himself! The good news is that you can catch plenty of signs he’s falling in love with you that give away how he really feels. And guess what? They’re all science-backed, so you know they’ll be accurate! Here is a comprehensive list of green flags to look for, from his small behaviors to the most obvious signals that he’s head over heels for you.
#1 He Tries To Make You Happy
This isn’t just about bringing you flowers and dedicating songs — although these gestures are super sweet. When he sees you’re upset or frustrated, he does what he can to make it better. He may offer to cook for you when you’re tired from work, or if he sees that you’re having a bad day, he might try to cheer you up with an unexpected gift or a surprise visit. He wants to make sure your life is as comfortable as possible because he genuinely wants to see you happy.
#2 He’s Been Asking About The Future
If he’s talking about how much fun it will be to go on your next vacation together, what kind of house you’d like to get when you settle down after college, or your idea of family, it means one thing. He’s got a vision for your future together and wants to talk about it! Marisa T. Cohen, an associate professor of psychology at St. Francis College says, “when partners push each other to answer those questions, it shows a certain level of intimacy.” It doesn’t necessarily mean he wants those things right now, but he’s showing an interest in your aspirations. That counts a lot because he wants to ensure your intentions are compatible.
#3 He Goes Out Of His Comfort Zone For You
It’s one thing to be nice, but it’s another to go out of your way to try something new just because your partner wants to. Research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology indicates that if he’s willing to try a new activity or experience he’s not used to, he’s really trying to make the relationship work. Disclaimer: nope, we’re not telling you to try and push your partner over the limits of what he feels he can do or forcing him to change. That’s a big no-no.
#4 He’s Been Revealing Intimate Details About Himself
Don’t get misled by that “intimate.” Sex undoubtedly has an important role, but it’s just a component of what creates intimacy, reports Marisa T. Cohen. He could be talking about his first kiss or his favorite book as a kid. Maybe it will be something more serious, like his biggest fears and secrets or his family history. It doesn’t matter what it is — the point is he’s opening up to you, and you’re seeing him at his most vulnerable, which means he feels safe enough around you to do so.
#5 He Gazes Into Your Eyes
If you’ve ever been in love, you know that it’s not exactly a voluntary experience. It sneaks up on you when you’re least expecting it and then sticks around worse than a bad cold. But if there’s one thing that can help you tell if a man is falling in love with you, it’s his gaze. When a person is in love, their eyes are naturally drawn toward the other person’s face, as reported by a study in Psychological Science. So if he’s looking at you with dreamy eyes like he’s trying to gaze into your soul, then he might just be falling for you!
#6 He’s Been More Optimistic Lately
If he’s been acting happier than usual, chances are good that he’s got some pretty strong feelings for you. A German study reports that being in a stable relationship makes us feel better about life in general and decreases our disposition to irritability, anxiety, and emotional instability.
#7 He’s Been Investing A Ton Of Time Into Your Relationship
If you’re wondering whether or not a man is in love with you, here’s a quick tip: check out how much time he’s investing in your relationship. As reported in a study by Purdue University, we’re naturally more likely to commit to a person we’re engaging in a satisfying relationship with. If he’s been doing all he can to spend time with you, he’s obviously smitten.
#8 He’s Physically Affectionate In Public
We’re not saying he’ll go full PDA, but a man falling in love may not be able to keep his hands off you. They’ll subtly find their way onto your shoulder, waist, or even your forehead as he brushes a stray hair away from your face. He might even grab your hand during a conversation with someone else, just because.
#9 He Makes Plans
Does he seem really excited about things you guys are doing together? He keeps in mind what your schedule is like and tries to coordinate it with his so that you can spend more time with each other? That’s a telltale sign he’s involved and invested in what you two are building.
#10 You’re Already In Love With Him
When it comes to love, women have it a little easier. A Spanish study found that women in love are more likely to be loved back than men are. The research goes deeper, theorizing that women tend to be more selective regarding their partners. Men, on the other hand, tend to say they’re in love even when they’re aware the feeling could be unrequited.
#11 He Does Things For You
You might have heard the saying, “actions speak louder than words.” When your man does something for you, it shows that he cares about your needs, wants to make things easier for you, and helps you out when he can. Don’t just thank him — ask what he needs help with! This will show him that you also care about him and his feelings.
#12 He’s Thinking About You
A little goes a long way. He might text you with a funny story, ask you questions about yourself, or comment on something you posted. Or maybe he’ll mention a song, a video, or something else that reminded him of you — all signals that he’s been thinking of you and felt like telling you about it.
#13 He’s Always Putting You First
We’re not saying that a man in love will end up ditching all his friends to have you as his top priority for the rest of his life. That would be insane, if not downright unhealthy. But you may start noticing he lets you decide your next date location without much compromising, does something for you without asking, or may not question something clearly important to you. A study published in Europe’s Journal of Psychology concludes that these small selfless acts are clear signs of compassionate love, which matches romantic love.
#14 When You Laugh, He Laughs
It might seem like an obvious sign, but laughter is truly one of the best ways to connect with someone else. An Evolutionary Psychology study highlights how men use humor to gauge a woman’s interest. If the two of you are constantly laughing at each other’s jokes, it’s a sign that the chemistry is real and his feelings for you run deep.
#15 You Can Feel His Heartbeat Match Yours
Partners’ natural connection toward each other is more profound than you might think. According to a study from the University of Colorado Boulder, when two people in love with each other sit close together, their heartbeats and breathing tend to naturally sync up and match — something the body does unconsciously.
#16 He Says “We” All The Time
It’s one of those things that can be a little bit hard to notice, but it clearly indicates that he’s falling in love with you. He’s not just saying it because he feels like he needs to. Marisa T. Cohen hints that strong couples genuinely consider both parties as essential elements of the picture when making plans or talking with others about something that involves you both. That’s why it’s natural to see a verbal shift toward using “we.”
#17 He’s Stopped Cleaning Up After Himself
Ok, this could sound bad, but hear us out. When the relationship begins, we’re all trying to show the best version of ourselves. Polished, gorgeous, charming — you name it. But over time, as soon as we start to feel comfortable with each other, it’s normal to let our guard down and show those sides of us that are not exactly pleasant, says Marisha T. Cohen. Definitely not an excuse to be nasty or disrespectful, but it shows he feels at ease around you enough to let go.
#18 He Reciprocates Your Interest
Sex and relationship expert Shan Boodram explains that how he interacts with you says a lot. Suppose he gives you his undivided attention when you’re together, responds to your texts within a relatively acceptable amount of time, and doesn’t bail out of plans at the last minute. In that case, you can safely assume that things are heading in a good direction. Especially in the early stages of your relationship, it means he’s already looking forward to spending time with you and wants to ensure he doesn’t miss out on any opportunities for intimacy or connection.
#19 He Engages With Your Socials
If he’s watching your Instagram stories and liking your tweets, that’s probably a good sign — though it could just mean that he’s into memes. Not necessarily a symptom of love per se, but asking about your friends and family or commenting on pictures of you in an effort to connect means a lot. Kristie Overstreet, a clinical sexologist and psychotherapist, confirms these are all excellent signs that what he feels for you goes deeper than friendship.
#20 He Posts About You
You probably know him as the guy who always posts about his favorite sports team or the latest weekend trip with his buddies. But when he starts posting about you? Shan Boodram is positive in saying that this is a clear signal he’s smitten since he’s comfortable with letting his closest friends and family know of his feelings for you.
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