A great comeback (not the Kim Kardashian kind) is like an Uno reverse card – it gives bullies of all ages a taste of their own medicine. But how many times have you thought of the perfect comeback after the fact?
Well, we’re here to help you prepare for your next insult with these scorching hot roasts that people shared in an online thread. One netizen asked on Reddit, “What is the greatest comeback to an insult you’ve ever heard?” and people came in guns blazing.
Take out your pens and your notepads (or just pull up your Notes app, probably), Pandas, and write these gems down. You never know when you might need to rip somebody a new one to defend your honor.
#1
Winston Churchill is attributed some great ones:
Lady Astor: “Mr. Churchill, you’re drunk.”
Churchill: “Yes madam, and you are ugly, but tomorrow I shall be sober.”
and also
Lady Astor: “Winston, if you were my husband, I’d poison your tea.”
Churchill: “Nancy, if I were your husband, I’d drink it.”.
Image source: -eDgAR-, Yousuf Karsh
#2
Gordon Ramsay asks his daughter on-camera, “So what’s it like being the daughter of the most famous chef in the world?”
His daughter replies, “I wouldn’t know; Jamie Oliver’s not my dad.”
Boom. Roasted.
Image source: thenewhalleloo, Dave Pullig
#3
1: “Everyone thinks you’re a jerk.”
2. “Well, you know what everyone thinks about you? Nothing. No one ever thinks about you. I know I don’t”.
Image source: anon, Vitaly Gariev
Why do we feel such a need to come up with a clever comeback after we’re insulted? Perhaps it’s because of how we, or rather, our bodies, react to insults. When a person says something mean to us, our bodies go into fight-or-flight mode. Essentially, we can’t come up with a witty reply because our brains just go blank.
As Brooklyn-based therapist Kerry McBroome explains it, our bodies take verbal insults as threats. “When someone says something offensive or harmful that hurts us or hurts a member of a community that’s really important to us, our nervous system can get activated,” she explained to TIME magazine.
#4
My dear Grandmother. She had a quick and savage wit.
My fiance and I held a ‘meet the whole family’ get together at my house.
It was the first time his father met my grandmother.
His dad was a large, physically intimidating man with a beer gut.
He began telling stories to my grandmother about how my fiance was a mischief maker when he was young.
Then told my grandmother how he would take off his belt and whip Joe for being bad.
My frail little grandmother stares directly at my hubby’s dad’s tummy and says, “Your belt? How ever could you find it?”
Future father-in-law was gobsmacked.
Image source: JustVern, Towfiqu barbhuiya
#5
From Casablanca.
Ugarte: You despise me, don’t you?
Rick: If I ever gave you any thought I might.
Image source: anon
#6
A neighborhood kid was picking on my daughter, and she replied with:
“I’m sorry you are so sad.”
Kid just walked away.
Image source: epidemica, Annie Spratt
The reality is that insults really hurt, and not just metaphorically. Apparently, insults can cause us actual physical pain, not just hurt our self-esteem. In 2022, researchers from the Netherlands concluded that hearing phrases like “You are a liar” has a similar effect to a slap in the face.
That’s why having a ready comeback at all times makes us feel safer. “There’s something really life-affirming about having something to say ready to go in your back pocket,” McBroome added.” Pulling off a sharp response can boost your confidence and be such a source of pride.”
#7
Lunch lady got me in front my whole class. Tuna fish was for lunch. I said ” tuna fish I’d rather a poop sandwich! “. Without missing a beat this 80 year old lady fires back: “Wait right there I can make you one in the back”. Needless to say I went with the tuna.
#8
I was in 1st grade and we were on the bus about to go home, and some mean bully yelled at me and it went like this.
Bully: Hey (My name) why are you so gay!!!?
Me: Because I like to copy you!
Bus: OoooOOoOHHhhhhhH
That was the best comeback i have ever made, and the kid behind me said “Ha nice” then like bro slapped my hand and I felt soo cool.
Later in 7th grade I figured out I was gay sooo, Checkmate bully…
Image source: Spotellis8888, Hunter Johnson
#9
“I’ve been called much worse by people much better”.
Image source: Dreadspore43, Vitaly Gariev
That familiar feeling of missing the beat when you need a witty comeback the most, even has its own name. L’esprit de l’escalier, or staircase wit, is used to describe the phenomenon of when a comeback comes to us too late. The term comes from the Parisian salons of the past, where gentlemen liked to debate each other. Alas, their best arguments would always come to them after the fact – as they were climbing the staircase.
As Maggie Rowe writes for Psychology Today, this does not make us flawed; it just makes us human. In fact, if you haven’t got a selection of scorching-hot comebacks at the ready, you’re probably going to blank again and again in situations where you get insulted.
#10
Private Hudson: Hey Vasquez, have you ever been mistaken for a man?
Private Vasquez: No. Have you?
Image source: keenly_disinterested
#11
My former friend was 12 years my senior and she fancied herself pretty heavily. She was OK, but I doubt anyone was losing sleep over her. Dressed waaaaaay too young, trying to hold on to her youth.
One day she pointed out that I was overweight and dumpy-looking next to her. I’d finally had enough (she made these comments often) and I said, “Well what about you?”
“Excuse me?!” she snapped, “I have the body of a 22 year old!”
“Well give it back, you’re stretching it out!”.
Image source: anon, Vitaly Gariev
#12
My favorite when I was younger…people liked to call others gay as an insult. When other kids would ask, “Are you gay? I think you’re gay!” I’d simply reply, “Now don’t you go getting your hopes up.”.
The only advice I ever got from my parents about bullying and comebacks was to turn the other cheek. “The bully is always the one who is hurting more, at the end of the day,” they would say. While it was very compassionate and admirable advice, perhaps it wasn’t always that helpful. In fact, experts say that sometimes the best reaction to an insult is a calmly set boundary.
#13
The best comeback I’ve heard was “you are the human equivalent of a participation award”.
Image source: redwraith74, Hayley Murray
#14
When someone interrupts me:
“I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the start of yours?”.
Image source: Victoria7272, Getty Images
#15
A friend of mine in first year university had never really dated any girls yet. This dumb guy that we were kind of friends with told him, “When you do get a girlfriend, I’m totally going to do her.”
He responded, “If I had a girlfriend that would do you, her cheating on me wouldn’t be the issue.”
Image source: jobbles, Jhont Ant
When someone insults us, our monkey brains immediately go for revenge: we want to “get” and hurt the person like they just did to us. But Oxford-based psychiatrist Neel Burton, M.D., says that there’s not much benefit from a comeback. “The witty put-down does have a place, but only among friends, and only to add to the merriment. And it ought to be followed by a token of reconciliation such as a toast or a pat on the shoulder.”
#16
Not quite an insult, but I still think of this comeback to this day.
I have two little brothers and it was my dad’s birthday so the semi-extended family were all at a resturant to celebrate. I had just graduated from my dad’s alma mater, and my middle brother was currently a junior there. My youngest brother (a freshman), however, opted to go to state school.
At one point my uncle said, “So [youngest brother], how does your dad feel about you breaking the trend of [our last name] men going to [alma mater]?”
My little bro thought for a moment and then said, “Well, he probably doesn’t mind considering I also broke the trend of not being able to get higher than a 3.0.”
The table exploded and my other brother and I just stared at each other across the table like holy did we just get brutally insulted?
It’s especially funny because my little bro was one of those shy high school kids who went off to college and came back fun and socially confident. I was hoping that development would happen, i just never expected it to stab me in the face.
Image source: JordanStPatrick
#17
Was once criticized by an older family member for having a stray tooth that gave me a bit of a craggy smile as an adolescent (it has settled in nicely). I was raised to not criticize what people can’t help and to give compliments where possible and so I did just that, sorta.
Aunt: Nice crocodile smile!
Me: Uh, thanks…
Aunt: It’s just that tooth, you know, makes your smile all crooked but it’s not that bad. You could get it fixed.
Me: I suppose but I know I’ll never have teeth as nice as yours are. They are like stars.
Aunt: Like stars? You mean as in bright?
Me: No, as in they come out at night.
My uncle had given me a book called, 1001 Insults for Every Occasion, a while earlier and that gem was in it.
Image source: WhenInDoubtBolt
#18
“Are you dumb?”
“Why? Are you starting a club?”.
Image source: anon
So, what’s the most effective way to react to an insult? According to Burton, it’s rebuking the insulter. “When it comes to people with whom we have an ongoing personal or professional relationship, […] it may be preferable to ‘have a quiet word’ (quiet, but firm) in a bid to reassert our boundaries.” So, however fun and satisfying comebacks may be, sometimes it’s best to just do the grown-up thing.
#19
I heard a story once about some girls in an elevator who were insulting some black guy in another language they thought he didn’t understand (Hindi I think) specifically commenting on his “ugly black face”. Apparently the guy waited til the elevator reached his floor, looked at them, and in perfect hindi said “Better to have an ugly face than an ugly heart” and left.
Image source: anon
#20
‘Go f yourself.’
“Do me yourself you coward”.
Image source: Rlegg101
#21
Was jokingly asked out to yr 10 formal (prom) in front of whole class by a “popular” girl who definitely had no interest in me. I without a moment’s hesitation say *No thanks Lauren. I have standards* whole class and teacher lost it.
Image source: sezdawg7
#22
Sitting in a bar at 3AM off of Bourbon St. The windows are just open shutters. Dude who just left the bar leans in on our table to shout at some friends still in the bar. One of our group makes a silly/snide comment. Dude leaning in smacks the table with an open palm and says, “Everybody who ever loved you was wrong.” Then he walks away without looking back.
We still revel in that story.
Image source: Azariah98
#23
During my University days, I ran into a friend/acquaintance of mine. And I was holding a Green Lantern Graphic Novel. My friend introduced me to his current girlfriend and THE FIRST THING she says to me while shaking my hand was “Aren’t comic books for kids?”. And I replied “Aren’t those A Cups for kids?”.
Honestly I was in so much shock that someone I just met would say that to me that I replied on instinct. Still my greatest comeback ever.
Image source: HellboyPrime
#24
I was playing spades one time and a guy tried to lead the game off with a spade. I told him he couldn’t do that; spades have to be broken first. He refused to play by the rules, so I refused to play. He started singing, “The wheels on the bus go round and round,” to imply that I was acting like a child. He asked me, “Do you know why I’m singing that?” I said, “Yeah, cause I’m taking you to school.”.
Image source: MW2713
#25
A street hustler is trying to hand out/sell CDs and an overweight gentleman walks by and says no thanks.
Hustler: “if it was a donut, you’d eat it.”
Tubby: “if it was a dollar, you’d beg for it.”.
Image source: anon
#26
My science teacher assigned a really hard test and almost everyone failed. Everyone complained and she responded with “ someone got a 93%, so it’s not impossible.” Then this one kid in the back said “the answer key doesn’t count Mrs.teacher”.
Image source: MrFittlebob
#27
Teacher: *asks a tough question*
Jimmy: *says the correct answer*
Karen: lol you‘re such a nerd
Teacher: Be nice to him Karen, he could be your boss someday
Jimmy: it‘s okay Teacher, i have no interest on being a pimp anyway
*whole class losing their minds*.
Image source: anon
#28
Just out of curiosity as to how good this actually was, for years, I was told that my sort-of-comeback was the best thing that anybody had ever heard, mostly because I was the quiet kid that nobody could get a rise out of. Naturally, because they couldn’t get a rise out of me, everybody tried to get me flustered by insulting me, or framing me for things that no teacher ever believed because it was never the quiet kid.
Essentially, I walked into class one day, and the teacher wasn’t there, but this other girl, S, was up at the whiteboard writing out a long-running joke about our teacher that pissed him off. It was about his assigned teacher number, and two years of developing a joke is a bit hard to explain. It became a bit of an inside joke. Either way, I sat down, she finished, and the teacher came in, noticing what was written on the board. He asked who did it, and immediately, this girl and a few of the girls around her said, “Sebaren did it!” Note, we were about 15 at the time, so they should have been beyond this.
I don’t know what it was, but something made me wordlessly walk up to the board, fix her spelling and punctuation errors, and then sit down. Only when I had sat down did I turn to the girl who’d done it to say, “I have standards.” The class collectively lost their minds, including the girls who hadn’t seen it coming, and the teacher laughed so hard he went red in the face and cried. To me, it seems like they just found it so funny because it was me because I don’t see anything particularly special or savage about it.
Image source: Sebaren
#29
Someone once told me I had a face only a mother could love, I responded with “Yes, your mother!”.
Image source: kierlavin
#30
Here’s my favorite self-burn.
In high school math class. A nice, nerdy guy named Richard. A jerk whose name I forget, let’s call him Jerk. Jerk keeps calling Richard “D**k.” Like, “Hey, D**k, did you get the answer to #4?” Richard keeps calmly saying “It’s Richard.” Finally the teacher says “Richard, what do you prefer to be called?” Richard says “I prefer Richard.” Jerk says “Well I prefer D**k.”
After a few seconds of uproarious laughter from the rest of the class, Jerk realized what he said and sunk as far down in his seat as possible and never bugged Richard again.
We were teenagers in the 80s so this was the height of hilarity.
Image source: OldSlug
#31
I have read this historical meme where it went like this:
British person: you, French people, fight for only money. We, British, fight for honor.
French person: Well, people fight for what they need the most.
Image source: KafkaesqueStuff
#32
Alright so it goes like this!
I had a bully in high school who was tiny! Like under 5 foot! I was 6’3″ at the time so he would always pick on me, throw stuff at my head, push me around, stuff like that. I never fought back cause I hate violence.
Anyway one day we were in a class together an the class went on lock down. It wasn’t a drill but we were told the campus wasn’t in danger. So jokingly I said
“I know why we’re locked down! Maybe the zombie apocalypse started!”
The bully immediately replies,
“You d*****s zombies aren’t real!”
I shot back,
“Yeah well we didn’t think Hobbits were real but your standing here aren’t you!”
He lunged at me and got in trouble.
Image source: Domosnake
#33
I heard this when I was in middle school:
Kid 1: Your d**k is the size of a Tic-Tac!
Kid 2: So is that why your mom’s breath is always minty?
Image source: Death_To_All_Anime
#34
Patting myself on the back for this one. I was helping a kid in class and big bully kid said I’m a nerd for helping. Told him, well at least I’m graduating, whole class went oohhhhhhhhh. Thought I had to fight the guy after so I watched my back the rest of the day.
He didn’t graduate, got caught with d***s and spent a few years in jail.
Image source: anon
#35
I was sitting outside my daughter’s dance class, working away on my laptop, realized I did something bad and said out loud: “I suck”
Old Asian grandma lady who I didn’t think was paying any attention says, “37 d***s in a row?”
God I laughed like never before or since.
Image source: billbapapa
#36
Kid in class “I don’t have a problem with people being gay in their houses, I just don’t want to see it out in the world. I don’t like looking at it, it disgusts me.”
“I don’t like looking at ugly people but nobody is making you wear a bag over your face”.
Image source: robinhood2417
#37
“You dress like a grandpa”
“That’s why your mom calls me daddy”.
Image source: yamanamawa
#38
My buddies and I were in college and walking back from a bar fairly late in the evening.. a homeless man kept annoyingly hounding us about giving him some money.. (this college town has a homeless community reputation so we’re used to it).. Anyways he followed us a block or so and exclaims “oh so you’re too cool to give me money.. where do you think you’re going ignoring me like that?”
My buddy’s single word roast looks back and says “HOME!”
It took us a minute to realize how bad he just ended this man’s whole career! Still talk about it to this day.
Image source: BraDDsTeR-_-
#39
From a drill instructor to another recruit in boot camp: ” is that acne on your face, or did you spend 9 months dodging the clothes hanger?”
Image source: cerbralplaugedoctor
#40
This wasn’t an insult personally but it was a comeback on behalf of a nation. My father is irish and he used to work in California. One day a particularly condescending colleague complimented my dad’s work by saying ‘I never thought I’d get to meet an intelligent Irishman’. To which my dad replied ‘hopefully someday I’ll be as fortunate with Americans’, which went completely over his colleagues’ head.
Image source: Hynestein
#41
My mum helped me come up with this one for a horrible fat boy who picked on me at school (who also had a crush on me I’m pretty sure) “You didn’t eat the pies, you ate the baker too!” Lol! All the nasty kids were shocked.
Image source: anon
#42
A teacher once tried making out that me and another student were gay. So I waited for the class to settle down and said “you seem to have an obsession with gay little boys sir” I have never seen a class kick off like it and to this day it’s one of my proudest moments.
Image source: colourblindmike
#43
I had a pretty fun one myself once from a few years ago.
I was at a friends place with a lot of people I didn’t really know too well having a few beers. Suddenly this dude from across the table says to me, quite agressively, that my suspenders were ugly and that they made me look like I was trying too hard (which, to be fair, I was). Without skipping a beat I stood up, unclipped my suspenders and put them in my pocket. When I sat down I looked straight into his eyes and replied “Now lets talk about that face tattoo of yours…”.
Image source: NoCaesar
#44
Kid in class (on the spectrum somewhere) knocks over a lab stool. Smart a*s goes haha you knocked over your chair. Stuff like this usually sets him off. To my amazement, he replies “No, I laid it down just like I do with your mother.” I gave him a high five.
Image source: BeigeRedneck
#45
This one came from year 6 at school, probably my favourite.
My mate: “your gay”
Some kid: without breaking step “you wish”
My mate got roasted and all I could do was applaud.
Image source: anon
#46
I was in Paris with a couple of friends, and in the subway. I did not speak any French, only a little Spanish, but my friend was practically fluent. We were talking and joking in English, and these two French women were talking s**t about us in French, mostly about us being gross or dumb Americans. As we left the subway, my friend smiled and told them in perfect French
“We’re going to go get cleaned up, too bad there’s no shower for your personality!”.
Image source: Harmonic_Content
#47
In a heated argument my mom called my brother a Son of A B. He replied, “you got that right”.
Image source: RonSwansonsOldMan
#48
Random kid: “I bet you can’t see your pp in the shower”
My friend: “Nope, only your moms head”
(yes I know this comeback was taken from somewhere but that doesn’t make it worse).
Image source: SylvesterWaters
#49
“Me respeita muleque! Só não sou teu pai porque tua mãe não tinha troco pra 20!”
Which roughly translate as: “Show some respect boy! I’m not your dad only because your mom didn’t have change for a 20!”.
Image source: DanteLeo24
#50
“Does your butt ever get jealous of the stuff that comes outta your mouth?”
Image source: anon
#51
The annoying kid of the grade had a spray bottle and kept on spraying it on people even though they asked him to stop, and some girl walked to him and it went something like this:
“Dude, can you stop?”
“Nah.”
“Aw, is it the only way you can make a girl wet?”.
Image source: chaoticneutraldoggo
#52
In 8th grade this kid yelled in the cramped hallway “hurry up and move y’all smell like butt” to which I replied “it’s cuz your mouth is too close to your nose”.
And my junior year of high school this huge girl called me a jerk for no reason, so I said “you’re just mad I can actually wipe my butt”.
Image source: Logus444
#53
I once gave a classmate a penny and told him, “it always feel nice giving money to the poor”. He response with “thanks man, with this I can do your mom and still get get change”.
Image source: Boldspear2
#54
I was in a yahoo chatroom (yes. I am old.) and was like 15 years old. Some guy I had been talking to for a while, and whom I had told I was 15, sent me a d**k pic out of nowhere. He asked me what I thought about it…
I told him my mom always told me good things come in small packages.
He was not impressed.
Image source: toriaanne
#55
In high school, this chubby/fat dude made fun of another guy in class.. kept mocking him with his curly hair.. this other guy is an introverted nerdy quiet guy.. suddenly he goes “yeah, well at least I can see my d**k!” Entire classroom went off!!I will always remember that episode.
Image source: Sino-
#56
It’s been told that former French President Jacques Chirac once made the following comeback, which is legendary in France.
Some dude yelled at him “Connard !” (it means “a*****e”, roughly). And he answered: “Pleased to meet you, I’m Jacques Chirac”.
Image source: Catersu
#57
Not really an insult …
My boss and I were trimming bird nails/wings. I reach for the nail clipper and they wouldn’t open . I grabbed the scissors and they fell apart. Finally the register froze when I entered my password to charge the customer.
My boss says “D**n girl, just k*****g everything you touch today ,huh? “
I looked at him, smiled , and touched him smack on the forehead. “Boop!”
The customer watching laughed so hard my boss got spooked and lost his grip on the bird .
Image source: kliketyklack
#58
A long time ago when mom jokes were the vogue in my early twenties (in the late 90’s) and before I realized that courage wasn’t just some level of manliness, I was telling a friend that they really needed to man up and tell someone the truth.
I looked over and said “Dude, don’t make me punch you where your balls are supposed to be!”, all implying that indeed he was in fact, b**less. Without dropping a beat, my friend just laid this one out there “Dude! You’re gonna punch your mom in the mouth?” Touche, Touche.
Image source: maresateoats
#59
“I’m sure that is a devastating insult in the Target break room”
Replace Target with whatever the insulters first (or current) part time/dead end job was.
Image source: shitz_brickz
#60
I’m overweight, which I’m fine with, but someone in my class decided to make a fat joke to me.
My reply: “Well, being fat just means I’m easier to spot, unlike your d**k.”
He never joked with me ever again.
Image source: anon
#61
4th grade and I was obsessed with mirrors. My mom knew this and let me take her little compact mirror she used to apply lipstick to school with me. A bully on the playground approached me with his friends because they wanted to use the ball I was playing with. He told me to give him the ball. I said no. He said I was ugly and all of his friends did the whole “Ohhhh, ooooooo” sound. So, I asked him what was uglier than ugly. He said what? I opened the mirror and showed him his reflection and he stood there not knowing what to say. One of his friends got the joke and started cracking up and one by one everyone else understood until everyone was laughing. The bully didn’t understand it and two or three of his friends all explained it to him. To this day I’ve never seen somebody’s face turn as red as his did. He never bothered me again and his friends became my friends.
Image source: Edge80
#62
Older elementary school when puberty was just starting for everyone…
Male classmate tried to catch me in a “gotcha” assuming that I wouldn’t know about biological things like that. So he said, “do you have *hair* on your d**k?”
I said, “Yes, why. Don’t you?”.
Image source: anon
#63
I saw on another thread a long time ago; busy restaurant in LA that had a lot of people waiting to be seated, some has-been celebrity played the “don’t you know who I am?” card with the host, who promptly responded “Honey, I don’t know who you are, I know who you used to be…”.
Image source: K-Zilla
#64
Someone once told me I look like the kind of guy who pisses sitting down.
I said he looks like the kind of guy who s***s standing up.
Image source: Neo_Spork
#65
One day a guy at school held the door for me and said :
“Ladies first” (i’m a guy)
I said :
“B*****s next”.
Image source: anon
#66
” You’re so full of s**t your eyes are brown ” found it in a book called insults and comebacks , still makes me giggle.
Image source: krissder
#67
“no you.”.
Image source: indecks77
#68
If I wanted my come back, I’d scrape it off your face.
Image source: Spreading_Kindnesses
#69
The only man you haven’t shagged is your dad and that’s because you’ve never met him – me to a girl who pointed how unattractive she found me for no good reason lol.
Image source: anon
#70
Back in the 90s when being called gay was still considered an insult…
Buddy 1: Hey, Chris, I heard you got caught calling gay phone s*x again.
Buddy 2: Yeah, I was calling your dad.
Image source: deltaoutlaw
#71
My dad got fed up with my buddy one time. My dad is tall and he is short.
He says:
“You know what buddy, I got 12 inches on you. And I’m taller.”.
Image source: zaffodil
#72
One from me: a kid in class was being quite homophobic about another boy who’d just came out ‘backs to the wall’ and such. I sighed and said ‘John, none of the girls in class fancy you….why would the boys?’.
Image source: Crutey
#73
A TV news weatherman said to a group of us off the air in a conversation about a local school, ” Well, I went there and IT SUCKED!” A really quick and funny producer instantly replied, “Kinda, cause and effect, right?” We all laughed for like 5 mins.
Image source: imflukeskywalker
#74
Okay I know it’s lame to mention one I said but…
I was 20 home visiting from school and a Fwb and I were planning a weekend together. We booked a hotel downtown and everything. (Big city) Well before hand I was having lunch w my mom, my siser and her at the time bf (they are now married.) My sister is 3 years older than me. I mention my weekend plans and my sister makes a judgie face and says something to my mom to the affect of
“How can you let her spend a weekend at a hotel with a man she’s not even in a relationship with” (making it out to be like I was being skanky)
To which I replied
“I’m sorry which one of us lost her virginity at 14 because it sure as hell wasn’t me.”
That shut her up pretty fast.
Image source: giggityweeee
#75
Overweight lady at McDonalds: “Well God gave me a mouth to talk so I’m gonna use that privilege.”
Random dude: “God gave you a mouth to eat too but I see you’ve a****d that privilege.”
Overweight lady’s jaw drops.
Random dude: “You’ve got some ketchup on your chin.”
She proceeds to wipe with a napkin.
Random dude: “No, wrong chin.”.
Image source: RiSET0FaLL
#76
“How appropriate! You fight like a cow!”.
Image source: klop422
#77
Few years ago had a summer job cleaning the beach and pulling weeds. Had a hard time pulling this weed out so this kid who I worked with came along
Him: Move Over this is a man’s job!!
Me: Then why are you doing it??
Everyone laughed.
Image source: kellygirl3
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