Britney Spears is once again peeling back the curtain on one of the most painful chapters of her life.
In a recent Instagram post, the pop icon reflected on her 2018 rehab stay under her conservatorship, saying she believes “brain damage happened to me” but that she’s “moved on from that troubling time” and feels “blessed to be alive.”
Her words came just as her ex-husband, Kevin Federline, began promoting his new memoir, You Thought You Knew.
The singer recalls losing her freedom and feeling her “wings were taken away”
Image credits: Getty/C Flanigan
In her post shared on Sunday, October 19, Spears paired a photo of herself on horseback with a caption that shared a lot about her past.
She compared her shoulder blades to “wings,” referencing the film Maleficent and its story of betrayal and restoration.
Image credits: Instagram/britneyspears
“Remember the king tried to kill her, but instead a guy secretly took her wings,” Spears wrote.
“Anything holy is never forgotten… her wings were holy, so the king couldn’t take them… I do find it incredibly interesting.”
Image credits: Instagram/britneyspears
The 42-year-old then related the metaphor to her past, revisiting what she called a “traumatic experience” during her four-month stay in a rehab facility, according to People magazine.
In her memoir, The Woman in Me, Spears revealed that for four months, she was forced to stay in a room without a private door.
Image credits: Getty/Ethan Miller
“I no longer had my private door and illegally was forced to not use my feet or body to go anywhere. For a person like me who understands the sacredness is god speed… it did more than hurt my body,” Spears shared.
“Trust me, there’s A LOT I didn’t share in my book and still things at this very moment I’ve kept hidden because it’s incredibly painful and sad.”
She said she felt her connection between body and mind had been “destroyed.” “I do feel the logic and mindfulness in my body as ONE was 100 percent murdered and destroyed.
“I couldn’t dance or move for 5 months,” she added.
Britney also reflected on motherhood and her late grandfather’s advice
Image credits: Getty/Jason Merritt
Despite the pain, Spears expressed gratitude for the strength she once had, especially as a mom to sons Sean Preston, who is now 20, and Jayden James, who is now 19.
“I used to swim with my babies on my back till they were 4 and 5. I was incredibly strong,” she recalled.
Spears connected her recovery to Maleficent’s story of reclaiming her wings. “I do feel like my wings were taken away and brain damage happened to me a long time ago, 100 percent,” she wrote.
“I have, of course, moved on from that troubling time in my life, and I’m blessed to be alive.”
Image credits: Amazon
In a separate post, Spears also revealed a heartfelt conversation she once had with her late grandfather.
“He said promise me one thing… people will talk and talk and the world can be a very cruel place,” she wrote.
“He said, promise me you won’t care what these ignorant people say and lie about you.”
Her grandfather urged her to remain strong. “He said you stay fearless… that’s in your blood,” Spears continued.
Image credits: Getty/Bauer-Griffin
“Don’t become crippled and scared and a person explaining yourself so you give them the entitlement to make you less than them…
“When people really understand the power of your name alone, people will test you and do absolutely anything to pull you down.”
Britney Spears’ reflections came amid Kevin Federline’s upcoming memoir
The pop star’s emotional post coincided with renewed media attention surrounding her ex-husband Kevin Federline’s book You Thought You Knew, set for release on October 21.
The memoir reportedly revisits his marriage with Spears and includes claims about her alleged irresponsibility towards their children, according to TMZ.
“I was in Miami for work, trying to stay focused on my commitments, and I got a call. It was her, Paris Hilton, and Lindsay Lohan on the line, drunk as hell, begging me to come over.
“I could hear Preston and Jayden crying in the background. It had to be three or four in the morning. That call was the final straw,” Federline wrote in his memoir.
Image credits: Getty/Jamie McCarthy
Federline further claimed that prior to that incident, he had been aware of reports alleging Spears’ inappropriate behavior.
But after hearing his children crying on the phone, Federline noted that his hopes for his relationship with Spears were done.
Image credits: Instagram/britneyspears
“I’d already seen the photos in the tabloids, the ones of her out with them all night, partying at Paris’s Malibu place. But hearing my kids crying while she was doing God-knows-what?
“That was it. Any deep-seated sliver of hope that I’d held onto, that we might still somehow pull it together for the kids, d**d right then.”
Image credits: Instagram/britneyspears
A representative for Spears issued a statement to People magazine following excerpts from Federline’s memoir.
“With news from Kevin’s book breaking, once again he and others are profiting off her and sadly it comes after child support has ended with Kevin.”
Image credits: Instagram/britneyspears
“All she cares about are her kids, Sean Preston and Jayden James, and their well-being during this sensationalism.”
Netizens shared their thoughts on Britney Spears’ reflective Instagram post on social media
Image credits: Instagram/britneyspears
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