Weddings are supposed to be the best day of the happy couple’s life, but most folks often overlook the fact that the leadup is generally pretty stressful. After all, a wedding is still a big event, with multiple plates, both literal and figurative, spinning at the same time. The result is that the bride and groom sometimes seem ready to snap at any given moment.
A bridesmaid asked the internet for advice on how to handle a bride who seemed to think she got her nails done just to upstage her. Later, she shared how the actual wedding went. We reached out to the woman who made the post via private message and will update the article when she gets back to us.
Most people in the wedding party will take some effort to look nice
Image credits: Vitaly Gariev (not the actual photo)
So one bridesmaid was surprised the bride seemed annoyed at her getting her nails done
Image credits: Weaver-Of-Talez
Image source: Weaver-Of-Talez
Brides being antagonistic before a wedding is, sadly, a trend
Image credits: Alexander Mass (not the actual photo)
The phenomenon of the “bridezilla”, that supposedly monstrous bride who becomes unreasonable, demanding, and temperamental during wedding planning, has become cultural shorthand for a woman who’s lost perspective. But here’s the uncomfortable truth: wedding planning is objectively, measurably, scientifically stressful, and labeling stressed brides as monsters is a convenient way to avoid acknowledging why.
Studies have found that seventy percent of engaged couples or newlyweds described the process of planning a wedding as “extremely stressful,” which is basically the same percentage of people who would describe being chased by a bear as stressful. According to a 2023 survey, fifty-nine percent of couples describe wedding planning as overwhelming, with many reporting physical symptoms like headaches, appetite changes, hair loss and skin breakouts. So basically, planning your wedding gives you the same symptoms as a significant illness, except you’re also expected to smile through it and be grateful for the experience.
The financial pressure alone is enough to justify some allegedly “bridezilla” behavior. Weddings are expensive, often costing the same as a down payment on a house. When you’re hemorrhaging money at a rate that would make a lottery winner nervous, the stakes for everything going right increase exponentially. It’s not unreasonable to have strong feelings about whether the flowers are correct when those flowers cost more than your first car. The expectation that brides should remain perpetually cheerful while watching their savings account evaporate is frankly absurd.
It’s ok to cut people a bit of slack
Image credits: micheile henderson (not the actual photo)
Then there’s the perfection pressure, which has been amplified to nightmare levels by social media. Every wedding now needs to be Instagram-worthy, Pinterest-perfect, and capable of generating enough content to justify its own hashtag. The pressure to meet both personal expectations and those of wedding guests puts enormous stress on couples, with the bride typically bearing the brunt of criticism if anything falls short of flawless. The desire to make everything perfect combined with the pressure to please everyone can be overwhelming, creating a psychological pressure cooker where even minor setbacks feel catastrophic.
Wedding planning also forces people to navigate complex family dynamics while simultaneously making approximately eight thousand decisions about things they’ve never had to consider before. Do you have an opinion about charger plates? You will. Can you distinguish between ivory and cream? You’d better learn. The fight over centerpieces or seemingly mundane miscommunications during wedding planning are typically symptoms of much deeper issues, power struggles, family tensions, differing values, and the fundamental stress of planning a major life transition while trying to keep everyone happy.
The term “bridezilla” itself is problematic, functioning as a microaggression that judges women for having standards, expressing stress, or daring to care deeply about their own wedding. It’s worth noting that “groomzilla” exists but is rarely used with the same frequency or venom, despite grooms being equally capable of unreasonable behavior. The label allows people to dismiss legitimate concerns as hysteria and frames normal stress responses as monstrous behavior. Under stress, none of us are at our best, that’s just basic human psychology, but somehow when a bride reaches her breaking point after months of planning, budget negotiations, family drama, and decision fatigue, she becomes a cautionary tale rather than someone deserving of empathy.
Perhaps instead of pathologizing stressed brides, we should acknowledge that wedding planning is genuinely difficult and that expecting someone to maintain perfect composure while orchestrating a massive event, managing competing interests, spending a fortune, and contemplating a major life change is setting them up to fail. The real monster isn’t the bride who snaps after the caterer cancels for the third time, it’s the unrealistic expectation that she should handle it all with serene grace while wearing a smile and a label maker.
A few people wanted more details
Others thought the bride might have lost it
Later, she shared an update
Image credits: Weaver-Of-Talez
Image credits: Victoria Priessnitz (not the actual photo)
Image source: Weaver-Of-Talez
People were happy everything worked out in the end
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