Hello, Nashville fans! It’s time to get down and dirty and talk about our favorite faux country music stars. I am pleased to announce that Liam McGuinnis makes another appearance as the wild card record producer that cannot stay out of Rayna James’ orbit. Liam meets up with Rayna at the recording studio to help out Scarlett, but not before giving Luke Wheeler a visual dressing down and making sure to continue to flirt with Rayna. It’s okay Liam. We all know that Luke Wheeler will never last. So far Luke has done nothing but shower Rayna with praises and gifts and we all know that affectionate men who have their lives together are not her type.
But back to Liam, the second that his musical pairing with Scarlett was announced I knew we were in trouble. Scarlett has been unable to assume the basic tasks of being a singer/songwriter without having a nervous breakdown or yelling at Gunner. She’s a fragile little bird that seems to be held together by scotch tape. Enter our friend Liam, whose long hair and man necklace tell us that he doesn’t play by the rules. At first I was worried that this would lead to their romantic pairing because everyone who makes music together in Nashville ends up in the same bed. But no, their pairing was the perfect set up for the plot line that all soap operas must encounter: PILLS. What kind of pills are they? We’ll never know. Just that they came from a prescription bottle that may or may not be Liam’s and they help Scarlett stay awake. Congratulations Scarlett, you’ve probably done meth!
Speaking of train wrecks, Juliette finally gets her induction ceremony at the Grand Ole Opry. This would be the perfect opportunity for her to apologize to her fans with a prewritten apology made by none other than Jeff from Edgehill Records. Jeff’s character is exemplified by his eyebrows. They’re always gesticulating. He raises his eyebrows at Juliette’s manager, Glenn, and says “at last, the filly has broken.” The eyebrows think that they speak the truth but they don’t know Juliette. Juliette has a change of heart during her concert and she gives a proverbial middle finger to her record label instead of apologizing. I thought that move was pretty ballsy and assumed this would lead into a giant wide Nashvillian embrace of tiny Hayden Panettiere but instead she got a cold reception and a luke warm “attaboy” from Rayna. Juliette later conceded that she got the strength to stand up to the man because of all the loving attention she’s received from Avery. Let’s back track a second — Avery is the kid who jumped in blind to a horrible record contract and is back working at the Blue Bird Café. But never mind, he loves Juliette and that’s all that matters.
And just in case you forgot that Lamar is sulking in prison, Teddy continues the hunt to find out who killed “I faked a pregnancy with pig’s blood” Peggy. He takes a break from being a father and a mayor to chase lawyers all over town to find out what happened. Deacon’s lawyer girlfriend tells him that he’s going insane. Teddy Conrad, your life is officially meaningless. It’s perfectly fine for you to go insane. Rayna’s sister continues to be tangentially related to the story, hiding out in a motel rather than appearing in court to testify against Lamar. She also pulls a double sneakaroo on the agent who finds her to let him know that she took the incriminating documents illegally and so she can’t be compelled to share them. Nashville, thank you for providing the least legally accurate 10 minutes of television. But anyways, Lamar’s gotta do what he’s gotta do and he gets out of jail scot free and Teddy Bear Conrad looks anxious.
Bulleted observations:
-Did anyone else notice Juliette dumping a bottle of ketchup into a bowl of macaroni? Gross.
-Rayna James can think of no other way to push an album than through in-store distribution.
-In case you missed it, Juliette turns down a duet opportunity with Deacon. Ouch.
-So no one will ever know that Peggy faked a pregnancy with pig’s blood? That’s a shame.
-I’m glad Rayna got her own NASCAR but Connie Britton is the one who deserves it.
-Why can’t we get more actors from Friday Night Lights written into this show? I think Taylor Kitsch could easily be Juliette’s bad decision boyfriend.
-Brad Paisley is always showing up and being Brad Paisley.
-Maddie is the moral conscience of this show. Obviously.
[Photo via Mark Levine/ABC]
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