Anyone who has ever worked in customer service has some wild stories. If you interact with enough people on a daily basis, you’re bound to encounter some who make you start to question your sanity. But you get to see an even more intimate (and sometimes terrifying) side of your clients when you have to set foot into their homes…
Service workers on Reddit have recently been discussing the craziest and most surprising things they’ve ever witnessed during home visits. From people threatening them with weapons to houses that looked like they hadn’t been cleaned in decades, we’ve gathered their best tales below. Enjoy reading through these stories, and be sure to upvote the ones that give you a greater appreciation for your desk job!
#1
I’m an insurance adjuster. I had to present an estimate to both the homeowner and a life size mannequin that she had seated at the table that she told me to address as “Marie.” While I was explaining the repair process, she started to paint Marie’s nails.
Image source: westsideases, Ulrich Scharwächter / Pexels
#2
Former satellite install tech here. I have many to add to this but the best was a family that had a Jaguar in the driveway, getting 3 HD DVR boxes, international dish with channels. They had NO FLOOR! I had to step over the piping and framing on the dirt floor to get from room to room. It was a rotten away wood floor. They were nice as hell.
Image source: anon, Francesco Ungaro / Unsplash
#3
Former cable tech. Saturday morning, 8am, I knock on the door of house in a lower middle class neighborhood. Little dude answers the door. Its obvious I woke him.
He points me to the TV and wanders back to bed. I kneel down and reach behind the TV to unplug the coax but I can’t see what I’m doing so my eyes wander around the room. The place is clean and modest. There’s a picture stand, about 6 feet tall, that holds about ten 8×11 portraits. Everyone of them is of a hefty guy in flamboyant drag. Huh, look at that.
So I go outside and finish my work. I come back in and drag guy is standing in the kitchen in a pink robe done up as a woman who just woke up. He shaved. He put makeup on. He drew bags under his eyes. His wig is tussled to look like bed head. He speaks in a falsetto. He brings me a cup of coffee and I explain that squirrels chewed their cable line. I address him as “Ma’am” which delights him. Everything’s cool.
Then a chicken walks out of the back room. The chicken is wearing a red baseball jersey and red baseball cap. Then another chicken appears in a pink dress. And another one in a brown sweater. They walk over to drag guy and he casually pets one as he’s talking to me. The princess chicken craps on his floor and he cleans it up with a paper towel. No big deal. Just a very friendly likeable guy who is very serious about dressing as a woman and his costumed poultry.
Image source: Itsagasket, cottonbro studio / Pexels
When most of us go to work in the morning, we head to an office building, a store, a restaurant, or some other place of business. If you’re lucky, you might even get to work from home. But a world that most of us are unfamiliar with is the kind of job that requires stepping into a stranger’s home. You probably haven’t even had all of your friends over to your house, but when the toilet needs fixing, you’ve gotta invite a plumber in.
The thing about having a stranger in your home, though, is that the homeowner tends to think they’re the one who should be worried. What if the worker tries to steal something? Is it really safe to have a random man here working when I live alone? However, from these stories, we can see that sometimes it’s the service worker who needs to be concerned. After all, they’re stepping into a stranger’s house, so they don’t really have much power in the situation.
#4
Stepped in s**t, the second I stepped in the house. Dog mess. The guy said don’t worry about it. I heavy right footed all over his house. Gross. I left like 10 s****y footprints and proceeded to fix his A/C on the roof.
Another one, I knocked on the door, and the guy answered with his pants around his ankles. I said hey let me get my tools, be right back. I came back like 2 minutes later, and he is walking around pulling his pants up, unbuttoned, and they keep falling. For like 15 minutes while I’m troubleshooting.
Image source: unfilteredhumor, Maddie / Unsplash
#5
Work as a Low Voltage Security installer (Home security and small business and the like).
I’m like 99% sure this one old lady we installed for was a N**i..
She had a VERY LARGE amount of Pro-N**i WWII books and items… hardcore german accent… two perfectly trained german shepherds.. And a photo of her in what looked to be late teens/early 20’s with a god d**n Iron Cross around her neck…..
Nicest lady in the world and outside of visiting her home, you wouldn’t have ever known. Her husband she married recently (within 5-7 years ago) is like this hardcore full blooded American guy (the kind who only buys “Made in America” items and what not).
Image source: LowVoltageTA, Anna Shvets / Pexels
#6
I had a guy silenty walk up behind me holding a p*stol by his side and basically interrogate me, I said to him, “Didn’t you call me out here?” And he was like “yeah but you never know if someone’s gonna steal from you.” Got out of there as quick as I could and he was blacklisted.
Image source: Gr1nling, Dmitriy Ganin / Pexels
When it comes to staying safe while visiting clients’ homes, Transnation Tile Agency recommends always keeping personal information private. You don’t even have to use your real first name if you don’t want to. Make sure that you also keep someone informed about your plans and travels at all times, so they’ll notice if you are with the client longer than you were supposed to be.
When you arrive at a client’s home, park in such a way that you’ll be able to exit easily. And make sure that you always have a charged cell phone on you. Conduct all of your appointments during normal business hours, and come prepared with apps that allow you to discreetly and quickly call for help if necessary. This may sound extreme, but it’s always better to be safe than sorry.
#7
I think I’ve won this one, unfortunately.
Honorable mention to the couple that I just worked for, younger black lady with an older white guy. ‘Don’t mind the mirror on the ceiling. I appreciate your discretion with that’ she said. ‘We all have our ‘things’’.
My worst one though, I was hired to install a few bifold doors in a home. I was greeted for an early 20s Filipino boy. But he wasn’t the homeowner. He was quite flamboyant and showed me where the bifold doors were to install.
I ignored his appearance and got to work. Shortly after I started, the homeowner woke up. He proceeded to pull up a lawn chair (inside a pretty nice home) I assume so he can get extra close to me.
He was completely naked except for very skimpy red underwear. I 100% avoided eye contact and ignored him. Not out of fear, but because it was pretty clear what he was trying to do. He was completely ‘manspreading’ watching me. Sipping a margarita and smoking a cigarette… at 9AM. After about 45 minutes I was wrapping up that set up bifold doors and he goes ‘I’ve been sitting here for the last 30 minutes and you don’t say A WORD! Aren’t you wondering why a man is sitting here practically naked watching you work?’
I go ‘oh sorry, didn’t even realize you were there’. He hated that lol.
He said ‘what would you say to me if I wanted to SUCK… YOUR… D**K…’.
I said ‘I would say ‘no thanks’.’ And just walked away.
His boy toy heard this interaction and had a word with him. He didn’t say anything else to me, but continued to follow me around the rest of the morning while I finished my work. Halfway through finishing I realized my Gatorade went missing, only to reappear right where I left it.
They said SPECIFICALLY ‘are you going to drink your Gatorade?’
I said ‘uh… no thanks. I lost track of it a while back and not sure if one of you drank from it’.
They continued to ask me to stay and drink margaritas and smoke, but I just collected my check and left.
Turns out the dude was a retired cop so he definitely had weapons and restraints in the house. I just took my money to the bank and never heard from him again.
Image source: Silly_Ad_9592, zinkevych / Magnific
#8
A house that was basically a shrine for evil worship and witchcraft, and the owners were super creepy and kept offering me weird drinks. They had peepholes through walls so they could always just peer at other rooms, and I had eyes on me in each room. I’m familiar with their religion, and it was bizarre. There were statues and imagery of deities beheading people…
Lots of weird s****l s**t. Seems like other posts covered it.
Image source: throwaway4me88, Pavel Danilyuk / Pexels
#9
Former cop here: I responded to a house for a domestic disturbance. I arrived and a very upset lady approached me. She demanded that “they” get out of her house. I entered the living room and no one was in there.
After looking around the rest of the house and not seeing anyone I asked her who needs to get out of her house? While pointing at the empty couch she replied “these mothef**kers right here.” I caught on that she was mentally ill. I then ordered the non-existent “mothef**kers” to leave the lady’s house. She was thankful.
Image source: D_illa, Kampus Production / Pexels
Are you enjoying your scroll through these crazy stories from clients’ homes, pandas? Keep upvoting the ones that shock you, and let us know in the comments below if you’ve ever experienced anything similar while on the clock. Then, if you’re interested in checking out another article from Bored Panda discussing similarly wild stories from work, we recommend reading this one next!
#10
Did a wall furnace repair at a rental once while two teenage girls made out on the couch right next to the furnace I was repairing. I mean they were really going at it. I finished the repair right before the clothes started coming off. Needless to say, uncomfortable.
Did a plumbing repair in some gay guys bathroom, and there was a floor to ceiling portrait of some naked guy right across from the toilet. Needless to say, uncomfortable.
There is this lady who I still do jobs for occasionally. She takes 15 minutes to tell me the problem, then instantly bursts into tears. I mean this lady cries at least 5 times while I am there. Needless to say, uncomfortable.
I can’t even tell you how many “hoarder” houses I have been in over the last 24 years. One house, this lady had stuff stacked up everywhere. It wasn’t smelly or anything, just stacks and stacks of stuff. There were little paths to get to the different rooms. I know she was embarrassed about it. She said to me, “I bet this is the messiest house you’ve ever been in,” to which I replied, “No…but its right up there!”
But without a doubt, the craziest thing ever was about 15 years ago. I had to install an a/c at a house where a schizophrenic lady lived. Her father, the owner of the house, was a great guy, a regular customer. I had been to his daughters house a few times, and for some reason, she was ok with me. Her father had told me ahead of time how to act, what to not say, etc. So, I got along fine with her. Well, we had a new guy on that job, and he was just out of refrigeration school. He was wearing his uniform he got from the school, as his work issued ones hadn’t arrived yet. It had some kind of patch on the shoulder, like a cross. Also, this guy was tall, like 6’2, and had a shaved head.
We get to the job, I go in first to she how she is first, and she seems normal. So I bring the new guy in, to introduce him to her, to make sure she will be ok with him. The second she laid eyes on him, she turned into some kind of evil demon. “N**I N**I N**I!” she starts screaming, I mean at the TOP of her lungs. The new guy is frozen in fear. I am standing between him and her. She starts grabbing things, books, knickknacks, anything she can, and is hurling them at the new guy, all the while screaming stuff about N*zis and Jew K**lers and she’s not going to d*e today….I told the new guy to run. Somehow I managed to calm her down. I called her father. He had to take her somewhere else for a couple days while we did the job. It really surprised me because I mean me and her would have normal conversations all the other times I was there, but I guess she just snapped when she saw the new guy.
Image source: ST1300rdr, RDNE Stock project / Pexels
#11
Handyman here, strangest things I’d ever seen were the times I had to unclog toilets because ladies flushed their tampons down the toilet, (Ladies: DO NOT FLUSH TAMPONS DOWN THE F*****G TOILET, IT WILL F**K UP YOUR PLUMBING) the time I had to unclog a toilet because “something” got stuck in it (it turned out to be a gigantic b**t plug, and no, it wasn’t a s**y lady, it was a middle-aged dude.).
Image source: lovelybone93, magnific / Magnific
#12
Security system tech
Pretty sure i set up a grow house
Edit: fyi…..the security system doesnt have to alert the cops.
Image source: texaspacejoey, pvproductions / Magnific
#13
Went to an apartment to repair a/c , dude answers the door obviously high as s**t, room smells like w**d. He says ‘wait a sec’ and closes the door for a minute. Let’s me in and I see a bowl of w**d on the table, he notices I’ve seen it tries to distract me and hides it.
As I’m working see the couch beside me has 1 side pulled slightly away from the wall. Look behind and see a massive b*ng not so discreetly hidden. I started laughing quietly as the st*ner looked amazed that I had busted his unfindable hiding spot. He then rushes over and pulls the ‘hey where did this come from must be my roommates’. Tried real hard to contain laughter for the rest of the job.
Image source: youkn0wit, Thirdman / Pexels
#14
I had a side job working for a TV repair outfit. I was hired to drive the company truck, unhook the set, load it up, then return it once the repairs were complete.
On this particular occasion, the business owner decided to tag along with me to get out of the office. We knock on the door and immediately notice that EVERYTHING is white. White carpet, white couch, white mop dog, white-ish art on the walls, white everywhere…it was almost clinical. The guy held us at the door and handed us booties to wear. He wouldn’t allow us in the house without wearing them. He didn’t want us to track any dirt into the house. Whatever dude, just let me get the TV so we can get going.
We don the booties, walk in and start disconnecting and labelling cables and get ready to remove the TV from the wall. The guy walks into the living room from the kitchen with a huge bowl of tomato soup, trips over the dog and spills most of the bright red contents all over the carpet and couch. It was all I could do to keep from laughing while he fetched the carpet cleaning machine, cussing up a storm the whole time.
After removing the TV, and loading it up, we walked back to the door to let the man know what to expect, repair timeframe, etc. He wouldn’t allow us back in without new booties, since we had gone outside and ‘ruined’ our current pairs, and was clearly upset that we had interrupted his cleaning. Through the opening in the doorway, I could see the little white mop-dog was under the dining room table in full s**t mode, squeezing one out onto the carpet.
Image source: cruceno, Sami Abdullah / Pexels
#15
HVAC guy here.
Wasn’t me, but one of my guys said he had a lady with a full scale ‘dungeon.’
Image source: apatheticviews, Valeria Nikitina / Pexels
#16
Was installing a home security system
The lady was nice as hell. But she owned aloooot of pythons.
Aloot of free range pythons.
Alot of leg cuddling free range pythons.
Image source: Lord_of_pie, Jeffry Surianto / Pexels
#17
In another life I did maintenance work on government housing projects in what was then the 4th most dangerous city in the county. Most of the stories were depressing, but some of the lighter ones:
There was the elderly, blind pensioner who liked to listen to soap operas, so instead of picking up a second-hand Goodwill TV he went out and bought himself a high-end 72′ inch television set: This was back when they were still cathode-ray-tubes and weighed about 600 pounds; we had to remove his double patio-doors to get the behemoth into the apartment and then it took up one entire end of his living room. The kicker was he just used an antenna to pick up local channels, but since he obviously couldn’t see how to tune it, the screen was always *completely out of focus*: Just 72 inches of fuzziness and blur.
And in the same vein as some of the other stories in this thread: There was the apartment where I needed to go repair flush-valve on the toilet. I knew the tenant, perfectly nice woman. So, I’m not sure who was more embarrassed, myself or the lady of the house, when she escorted me to the bathroom and we both noticed at the exact same time that there was still a purple d***o suction-cupped to the top edge of the bathtub like some obscene latex monolith. After that she invited me to Christmas dinner. I declined, and I’ve never been able to figure out if those two incidents were related.
And then there was the time I went out during the middle of the day to a unit occupied by a married couple: My visit obviously surprised the wife, but she never objected to me being there (it was always an option to ask me to come back at a better time). I’m still not sure what she thought was going to transpire when I told her I was going to replace the broken clothes-hanger in the bedroom closet, but needless to say, when I opened the closet door and discovered that was the spot where her boyfriend had chosen to try and hide, we were all started enough to scream. Given that I was suddenly face-to-face with a yelling naked man, I think my scream was the most justified.
It was an interesting job: I would collect the shell casings that I found on the ground when doing my rounds. I lined them up next to each other, telling myself that when they filled the edge of my desk, I was quitting. Well, that happened in about the first month. I stayed for another 11 after that.
Image source: JohnProof, Sofie D. / Unsplash
#18
I do IT consulting, and where I am is one of the most cults-per-capita areas in the world. It makes sense that some of my clients wind up being cults. I’ve found myself in a number of *really* unusual situations, but the one that sticks out the most was a spiritual “tantric workshop”. The whole thing was kinda nightmarish, delightfully topped with a 75 year old naked dude vigorously ringing a bell RIGHT next to my car, so i had to stand there and watch him and his pendulous balls fiercely swinging to and fro until I was able to leave.
Image source: neonjesus69, Natalia Blauth / Unsplash
#19
Tech Support here. My job is to go clean up computers after you’re done jacking it to dhaur63728hshifieihs.exe.
By far the weirdest house I went to was a shack out in the countryside. But I was more creeped out by the people than anything else. I’m used to working with older people, but there was something off with this t*******e of 70 year olds. Whatever. 1 hour and I’m out of here.
Their fapstation consisted of a cracked monitor and a crusty mouse and keyboard. Great. Boot up the computer. It’s surprisingly new, Windows 7. Get to login screen and ask for password. He doesn’t want to say it out loud so I let him type it in. Painstakingly slow, he pokes out “dragonslayer”. How much more stereotypical can you get?
What feels like an eternity passes, the woman describes that she thinks he got the virus from a game. One of the men is laying on the bed half dressed on his bed while the other is grunting in the bathroom.
I’m greeted by Megan Fox on the beach. Then a popup saying local singles want to meet me. There were atleast a dozen popupa. But nothing beats the look of the woman when the gifs pop up. She looks at the guy on the bed with a speechless W*F. It’s just as cringe worthy for me as well.
But the guy? He literally gives no f***s. All he says is “Just press ok” as he starts putting on a new pair of pants in the middle of a room. This is the most bizarre thing I’ve seen in a long time.
There’s literally nothing I can do, I can’t get the programs I need to remove the multi-layered s**t known as a man’s paradise because his computer remains unresponsive for no less than five minutes as I sit there twiddling my thumbs as his wife is cussing him out.
Enough’s enough, and I say we’ll come back later to reformat as I awkwardly shuffle out the door.
Image source: anon, Naboth Otieno / Pexels
#20
Well, sometimes I work as a maid (what’s the masculine version of that?) to make meets end. This one day I went to a seemingly normal apartment. The owner was a guy in his late 20’s or early 30’s. He went to work and left me cleaning there without much ado. When I went to clean his room, I bump into a dude (that the house owner didn’t mention at all) and he’s naked. There was even a d***o on the floor.
I didn’t say a thing, but the two of them were hot. Me and hot dude stare awkwardily at each other for a while. I let him pick up his stuff and leave. Such is life in Brazil.
Image source: filipelm, Gerardo Manzano / Pexels
#21
I do a lot of work for the diplomatic circles (Ottawa). The government of Malawi bought up a few properties around the city. A 7-figure home for the ambassador and a just-shy-of-7-figure home for the embassy. They then pulled out and closed down their missions, but sat on ~3-4 million in unused properties that slowly decayed.
A little more than a year ago they sold the former embassy. In the basement we found 6 premature baby incubators that had been donated but never shipped back to Malawi. I wondered how many children died while the government sat on donated aide and properties they were letting depreciate in value.
Image source: avec_aspartame, Mufid Majnun / Unsplash
#22
Plumber here. I was in an apartment doing a recipe in the bathroom. The tenant had a little dog that came over to say hi and then took a s**t on the carpet. I went in to the living room to let the tenant know and walked in on two dudes doing the nasty in the middle of the floor. Keep in mind, they were doing this knowing that there were two plumbers in their suite working!
Funny thing is, they were a little peeved at me for interrupting. I went back and told my buddy to stay out of the living room. I didn’t tell him why because I knew he would walk and we had the water to the building shut off until we finished our work.
Image source: chuck_bates, Polina Tankilevitch / Pexels
#23
I never answer these sort of questions because I’m always too late and will get buried. But I have a good one.
I used to be a plumber for a short while and the company had a big job changing radiators in council housing. So I saw a lot of weird stuff, bad smells, disgusting people. But the worst was in a relatively nice house. Clean with a happy looking family. I noticed a front page clipping of a newspaper framed on the wall.
Turns out the owner of the house one-punched a guy to d***h. The guy was the cousin of a famous footballer so it was sort of big news. I can’t remember the exact details but because it was only one punch the d***h was not considered m****r outright.
So yeah, the guy k****d someone and is proud enough about it to frame it for his young daughters to see. He probably still smiles about it. What a c**t.
Image source: GaijinFoot, Alena Darmel / Pexels
#24
This actually happened in my own home. I was 16 and my parents had not long separated and one of our toilets got badly clogged. With dad not being around my mum had to call a plumber. I was hanging around while he worked. He found about 50 crumpled up photos of my dad, clogging it up. With scorch marks. Apparently my mum tried to burn them and panicked and chucked them in the nearest water receptacle. To this day I question her logic but she was devastated and not sleeping so I kind of understand. Plumber was not amused. Bet he still tells stories about the crazy divorcee!
Image source: stefatr0n, kaboompics / Pexels
#25
I work high end security. I went to go p**s in the bathroom of this building we were watching. When I walked in, I immediately was hit in the face with a deep, penetrating smell. So I pushed forward and make my way to the last stall, the handicap stall. Its hard for me to fit in normal stalls with my uniform on. But inside that stall it looked like somebody had melted chocolate and smeared it *everywhere*. Handprints on the walls, behind the toilet, a toilet paper roll was half covered in s**t, leaning against the wall on top of the handicap rail, dripping s**t onto that metal toilet paper box which had been FILLED with s**t.
I roll out, and i tell my partner about it, and he doesn’t believe me. He’s been with me all night. I know it wasn’t him that went s**t-happy, and the building is closed. Cleaners clean EVERYTHING before the building closes. He just doesnt believe me. I walk with him back and I kick open the bathroom door and the smell comes out and smacks him in the face, I point him down to the stall and he shuffles his way on over, while I’m standing by the exit. When my buddy got there, he swung the stall door open wider with his foot, and it’s like somebody punched him in the jaw, like something physically attacks him. He jumps back and in air turns towards the sinks and starts projectile vomiting, it hits the mirror, sprays out, covers the sink and he goes to grab the side of the sink, but he puts his hands down *in vomit*, all while he’s STILL throwing up. He’s heaving, and gasping for air, theres vomit coming from his nose and im pretty sure every orifice on his head. When he grabbed the sink he reacted so violently he threw himself back and slipped on the collected vomit that had already started dripping from the mirror/sink. And landed HARD on the floor, in his vomit.
It was a crazy night. He ended up going home early.
Cleaners SWEAR they cleaned the bathrooms though.
Image source: anon, Nikolai Lapshin / Pexels
#26
I used to work for a company that did valuations on vehicles for insurance purposes. On occasion we would have to go to a client’s house to see the car, take pics etc.
One afternoon two of us get sent out to this lady’s house to collect information on her rare Mercedes convertible. When we arrive she invites us in and tells us that the car is in the garage. She is leading us through the house towards the garage and as we walk through a room there is a guy standing in the corner of the room wearing only a jock strap and he has a ball gag in his mouth. As if it is a normal situation she just says, “That’s Dave, never mind him. He won’t bother you.”
Image source: kane55, Wolf Art / Pexels
#27
When I was young my dad would take me with him to people’s houses while he did their cable. One house sticks out vividly. The outside of this trailer was absolutely trashed. There was trash absolutely everywhere, the grass was d**d, and there were chickens chasing me. That was the start of my fear of birds. I’ll share the other bird horror stories if anybody is interested. Anyways, we went in through the back door of this run down trailer and that’s when the smell hits me. It smelled like d***h had crawled into Satan’s a*s, died again, and then oozed it’s way out a week later into a pile of d**d fish. Being the sweet child with manners that I was my instinct was to hold my breath. My dad gave little red puffer faced me that look. You know the look. When we finally left that horrid place I noticed the cut open fish and chickens laying on the counter next to a cauldron of boiling water. My dad laughed at me the entire way home and still laughs his a*s off to this day.
Image source: Born-Confused, Strange Happenings / Unsplash
#28
My boyfriend works for a moving company.
Over the summer he had a job kinda late in the day (like 630 or 7 PM, it was the last one). He was in a really rich part of town and the job was to move some stuff from a tiny office to some chicks basement. So he and his partner load it all up and head over.
They get to the house and the chick answers the door in a white silk teddy and little silk shorts. She was about 45-50, but apparently in great shape. She told them to start taking boxes inside and downstairs, so they did. In the first five minutes some younger guy (he suspects it was her son) comes downstairs and is promptly sent to the grocery store, leaving my boyfriend and his coworker alone with this cougar.
So they are taking boxes downstairs and she is directing them around, verbal and physically. Lots of touching the hips and shoulders and muscles. At one point she fed my boyfriend chocolates by hand and grabbed his a*s quite firmly. She also gave them a tour of her basement, complete with “goddess room”. This was a bedroom, painted dark red, candles everywhere, with a huge four post bed in the middle. There were big glass jars full of coconut oil on the bedside tables, b**t plugs and d***os on the dresser, and my boyfriend reported that everything in the basement was all slippery.
Image source: manateetree23, Ivan S / Pexels
#29
I install security and home automation systems around some pretty bad areas. This summer while working in St. Louis I was helping this little old black lady set up her online account. She took me into her bedroom so I could access her desktop and I s**t you not, she had a samurai sword between her bed and nightstand.
Image source: post_sx_jz_rocket, Krys Amon / Unsplash
#30
I’m probably too late to get any love but I’m going to share this anyway. A couple of years so I ha a summer job as a plumber…
We’re working on an older house downtown, these historic houses have a sewage line that curves up before reaching the city piping. If you’re not careful they can clog.
So we flush the line and out comes an endless stream of tied off c**doms. The middle aged gentleman I’m helping seems to have a confused look on his face. “C**doms? That’s impossible, my wife died 5 years ago and my daughter is only—” at that point the sudden look of realization on his face was priceless. He started swearing and took off in a d**d sprint for his house where his 17 year old daughter and boyfriend were waiting.
Image source: stmagic420, Pavel Danilyuk / Pexels
#31
Years ago I had a job like this. One guy told us to wait outside while he “put some stuff away”. When we walked in 10 minutes later and the dining table had tons of things on it which were covered by a blanket, while everywhere else burnt spoons, rubber hose, h****n needles and baggies were scattered around the place. He made no effort to hide any of the d**g stuff, which is usually a paranoia junkies have, so I always wondered what was under the blanket….
Image source: Gold_Attorney_925
#32
A dungeon room with someone locked in a cage.
For clarity ; the house belonged to a dominatrix . I wasn’t shocked by what I saw , but I wasn’t expecting it either.
Image source: Repulsive_Physics_51
#33
I used to clean houses for a living (I still do, but only a couple since I have two other jobs). I cleaned an old lady’s house once- I mean grandmotherly, baking cookies for neighborhood children looking lady- who had a bunch of s*x toys in her dishwasher.
Image source: MyBobaFish
#34
I work in home healthcare, and I’ve seen it all.
Ever see hoarders? got a patient that her house is so bad that she has to leave so my driver can deliver her oxygen tank. It literally has enough room in it for her, her dog, and her oxygen. That’s it.
G*ns g*ns everywhere. Some people like to leave g*ns out, apparently in an effort to either “scare” me, or to make them feel more secure for having a stranger in their house. I’ve done machine setups while surrounded by handg*ns.
M**h labs! Went into a house that was filled with a smell that I can only describe as “burning mothballs”. was informed that this is a smell associated with making m**h.
D**d people! Went to a house for an appointment with a patient. i could see her sitting in her chair, but couldn’t get her to answer the door no matter what. Dogs inside going nuts, calling her phone, nothing. Checked the handle, it was open. Opened it a hair, yelled her name as loud as I could, nothing. Called the cops, and yep, died in her chair. She was a sweet lady too.
Had a particular patient who wasn’t that bright. They had a commode (bedside toilet). The bucket for the commode broke. While waiting for a new one, they just pulled the bucket out, and proceeded to s**t and p**s all over the floor.
Can’t think of anything else at the moment, but pretty much, you name it, I’ve seen it.
Image source: anon
#35
So this is the grossest thing I’ve seen in someone’s house.
My father is in the insurance restoration business. He gets contracted to restore people’s places to the state before whatever natural accident happened to them – fire, flood, burst water main etc… He would have to clean the house, list irretrievable items for compensation, order carpenters for new carpet etc… The whole works. There was a plumbing job where someone’s plumbing stopped working and all this raw sewerage came out.
All the rooms in this guy’s house was covered in 5 cm deep of sewerage from the toilet. That’s pretty normal in our job. But 50% of the floor was covered in raw sewerage. Untreated s**t. For anyone who hasn’t seen s**t overflow, it doesn’t look like s**t in turn form. The s**t breaks up and attaches itself to pieces of toilet paper. So his carpet was covered by brown, fuzzy, and very biological looking toilet paper. The smell was pretty bad too. It wasn’t like fart-stink, it was a ‘raw’ smell that skips all the b******t and just alerts you ‘don’t f*****g touch me’.
Felt so sorry for the guy can understand why he looked so exhausted and hopeless. Turns out it wasn’t even his fault though. I think a neighbour clogged up the communal sewerage pipe and he got the brunt of the flow because he was at the end of the street or the lowest point.
Image source: anon
#36
I do general tech support, as well as set up internet connections. I once went to a customer’s house who wanted her USB dial-up modem set up. I explained to her that she needed a dial-up provider, and I needed that information to set up her modem.
I got a bad vibe the entire time I was talking to her. I’m pretty sure she was schizophrenic or bipolar. She definitely was agoraphobic, and paranoid about the things I was telling her. She thought I was trying to scam her, or “plant evidence” (which she’d said other people throughout her life had tried to do to her).
Her speech pattern was erratic, and she went on and on about people trying to get her to do things or harm her in her life. I started to think that maybe she was just f*****g with me, hard, but after a half-hour of listening to her stream-of-consciousness form of conversation, I knew she had to have something wrong with her. It reminded me of a family member with bipolar when they are in their manic phase.
I couldn’t convince her that I was telling her the truth about her having to have a dial-up provider, with a username and password, not just a modem. She started blaming me for her not being able to connect to the internet, and I ended up having to excuse myself after she got angry and upset about it.
After I got back to the office, I told my coworkers about everything that had transpired, and put a note in her file that if anybody does tech support for her in the future, not to go to her house alone.
Image source: dxm65535
#37
I fix appliances.
Once I was called out to fix a washer that was in their basement. When I got there the entire basement was covered in dog c**p and urine, they had a couple dogs and just let them go down there, never cleaned up. I have never been so glad I can’t smell.
Image source: guywhowreckedhimself
#38
I don’t work in other peoples houses but this one time an electrician came to fix some thing in my basement. My dad thought I was comming up the stairs so as a joke, he shut the door and held it closed. It turns out it was the electrician comming up the stairs. Confused, the electrician says, “I need to come up ” and my dad replies with, “Why?” It was another 5 or 10 seconds before my dad realised what he had done.
Image source: PhilMcraken1289
#39
Old guy offered me bath tub moonshine when i was wiring in a new AC unit.
Image source: Sularin
#40
I did some housework for a friend’s step-dad for a while. I stopped because he wasn’t paying me.
-He had a king sized bed that had a fitted sheet, two top sheets, a comforter, a throw blanket, ten pillows and little drape thingys.
-I found cr*ck pipes at least three times.
-A bottle of fancy champagne in a closet, half drunk and covered in dust
-Papers all around the bathtub. Piles and piles of papers.
-His wife was pretty much trapped there because if she left, one of their dogs would cry and cry and the dude would hurt him in some way. So she had to stay there all day.
-Oprah’s channel played all day
Edit: this was a four floor quasi mansion.
And the dude slept alone. His wife slept downstairs, on the couch.
Image source: anon
#41
I am your run of the mill computer nerd. I help people with pretty much any computer problem as a side job. I mostly get work from word of mouth recommendations. A guy wanted some help ripping DVD’s and some other things. So I set up a time and go over to his trailer…..place is pretty wrecked but whatever. I have to ring in at the gate because the rottweilers won’t let me get to the door. He knew I was there anyway because of the surveillance equipment mounted to each end and door of the trailer. Go in, computer is in the back, of course, so we walk to the back. I don’t know if you’ve ever been in a trailer but no 1970’s trailer was built to hold a king sized bed. Sit down on the edge of the bed…at the computer..two rough white girls laying in the bed…toasted. Worked on the computer, wrote some step-by-step instructions to make his life easier, installed some software, and went over everything with him. Ready to leave and he pulls out a WAD of cash. All 100’s, easily $25-$30K. Gives me $100 and thanks me for all my help and escorts me out. Few weeks later, went back to help a little more. New girls. Same scenario…this time ready to leave and he is flat broke, zero money. Was not shocked. Never went back again, haven’t seen him since. Mostly because he’ll be in prison for at least 15 more years. Great guy though…and his brother was one of the nicest people I met when I first move here.
Image source: JHuggans
#42
I used to be a delivery boy at an appliance store so this is just one of my stories: Me and a coworker are delivering a washer and dryer to a really trashy trailer park and the guy is outside wearing only underwear and drinking a beer. We get the washer and dryer out of the truck and into his extremely tight doorways until we realize the laundry room doorway isnt big enough. Naked red neck grabs an axe and completely destroys the door way so the washer and drier would fit.
Image source: Jeremystewartt
#43
I used to work in in-home sales. On one appointment a guys house was disgusting gross. We saw a lot of dirty houses, this one stood alone. In the middle of us talking he excused himself to go use the bathroom…. which he proceeded to do in a bucket in his living room…
Image source: MattyBPureDriven
#44
I don’t work in people’s homes but I do work on their cars. Once, I was poking around in somebody’s car, looking for a wheel lock key and I found what appeared to be a brick of c*****e.
Image source: AerThreepwood
#45
Went to someones house to fix their PC.
I got there, and they showed me the PC and what the problem was, then went and sat outside. Understandable if it was a nice day and sitting out weather. It wasn’t. It was like they didnt want to be in their house when I was there. As once I’d done the job, they came back in. I left and then I was sat in the car for 5 minutes answering an email, and they didn’t come back outside again.
Image source: nastybacon
#46
I know this will get buried, but…
I delivered pizza for about five years during and after college. A few deliveries stick out in my mind, but one haunts me.
I delivered a pizza once to this somewhat secluded house. I worked in a large suburban town, but a lot of those will have secluded pockets right in the middle of them. The house was down a narrow road, and the house was surrounded by large trees, so it looked like it was in a forest. The house looked nice, well-kept, comfortable.
I knock on the door and this little girl answers. Probably 7 years old or so. Sweetest little kid. I see a younger sister behind her, just smiling. Their dad comes to the door and pleasantly pays for the pizza. The kids are clearly excited to be getting a pizza, so I leave this happy little domestic scene and return to the pizza place with a nice feeling. That’s not the haunting part.
About two weeks later there is a picture of the house on the front page of the paper. Couldn’t mistake it. The father had taped up the doors and windows, blew out the pilot light on the stove, and had gassed them all. I don’t remember the details — I think his wife had died, or left him — but he k****d himself and those perfect little girls. It’s been thirty years and it still gets to me sometimes.
Image source: ADeweyan
#47
Did Chimney Cleaning for awhile. Common s**t was drunk housewives at 10 AM trying to hide bottles and s**t when we came in, that was always a laugh. Sometimes they just didn’t give a f**k and would offer us a drink, beer and such. The oddest thing was when I was cleaning out a chimney, a dude had just purchased the house and tried to light a fire and it all just blew back in, totally blocked flue. So I go up on the roof to do my D**k Van D**e thing, and get the poles about halfway down the chimney, and start pulling out lengths and lengths of like cellophane, shrink rap, plastic bags, tape, I do the W*F face. I start looking at the s**t and its obviously d**g packaging material, had some spanish writing on it, lengths of duct tape stuck to it, numbers indicating weights, that kind of s**t. I told the owner, he called the cops over, I told him to call me when they are done investigating the whole thing and I’ll finish the cleaning for you. He calls 2 weeks later for me to come back and he was like yea well the former owner has been locked up 3 years on a d**g conspiracy case and, according to the police, had appealed his conviction. He bought the house after it had been reposessed by the bank and got a sweet deal on it, apparently being locked in prison puts a cramp on bill pay. That new evidence had the potential to k**l any hope of it. Cleaned his chimney and left. Bought me a 12 pack of shiner bock for my troubles. TLDR; Chimney sweep, drunk people, d***s.
Image source: mongoloidian
#48
I own a PC repair co. Basically we collect, fix, drop, but sometimes we have to fix wireless issues or unplug/move computers which means spending time in the house.
One time I was invited in by a couple and there was another guy on the sofa watching TV. What caught my attention was that he was sat in a warm house with a big thick hooded anorak on.
Anyway I got on with what I was doing. I solved the problem and stood up and the guy on the sofa doesn’t move his head from looking at the TV but mouths the words “help me”.
It took me a second to process that. I looked again, and he did it again. The couple were stood behind him and hadn’t seen this.
I looked at him and said “okay got it” as if I was talking about the IT issue. I got paid and was outta there fast.
I went straight to the police station and gave them the story.
They followed it up but I was never called to court so maybe it was a joke or something.
Image source: anon
#49
Not really “going on,” but rather something I saw. I cleaned homes with my mother-in-law for a while last year and while I was cleaning in a home office, I saw a check on the desk for $40,000 that said “poker winnings” in the memo line. I would have thought it was a joke, but then I noticed that it was post-dated for like one month in the future, making it seem more credible. Like the person actually needed to get their funds in order to be able to pay out.
Image source: gotogoatmeal
#50
Been waiting for this! Was a laborer on a construction crew in high school. One day my boss and I had to install a wall right down the center of a couples house. She had caught him cheating but he refused to move out so the compromise was to literally cut the house in half. The worst part was they were both there talking to us but refused to acknowledge each other’s presence. Most awkward work day I may have ever had.
Image source: nksoulskier
#51
Electrician here. I when I was an apprentice I worked in a old lady’s house who rescued parrots. Most of them had no feathers at all due to stress. So it was like working in a room full of live pieces of chicken that could swear at you.
Image source: MotherTucker89
#52
Ungodly amounts of cats and a stench of ammonia that was literally making our eyes tear up.
Image source: projectopinche
#53
Middle aged overweight male answered the door completely naked.
Image source: InnerMap4405
#54
Was with a flooring crew and had a job In a ghetto low income rental sanding a body shaped stain out of the floor that smelled like d**d possem. Was soaked so deep in the wood he must have been there for weeks.
Image source: stoned2dabown
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