You know that one neighbor who’s always knocking on your door, but never just to say hi? Maybe they need a cup of sugar, your Netflix login, or your life insurance. Okay, maybe not that, but you get the idea. There’s always something.
Living near people means sharing space, walls, and sometimes sanity. And while a little give-and-take is part of the deal, some folks really lean on the “take” part.
For one Redditor, that “take” turned into an $85 grocery bill she was apparently expected to cover for her neighbor, despite constantly lending her things she forgot to return.
More info: Reddit
Some neighbors borrow a cup of sugar, others borrow your Wi-Fi, your ladder, and your last shred of patience
Image credits: EyeEm / Freepik (not the actual photo)
One woman refuses to pay for her neighbor’s groceries after she repeatedly allowed her to borrow her things and never got them back
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The neighbor constantly asks to borrow things from the woman but never returns them, so the woman is hesitant to help her out again
Image credits: andranik.h90 / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The neighbor asks the woman to pay for her $85 grocery bill, promising to give the money back the same day
Image credits: Wildthings501
The woman refuses to pay for her neighbor’s snacks and beer and offers to give her $20 for food, but is called stingy for it
The OP (original poster), a 24-year-old just trying to live her best life in a regular apartment building, found herself dealing with a particularly high-maintenance neighbor named Kyah. Now, Kyah’s not a bad person; she’s actually friendly. But she’s also the kind of person who thinks “borrowing” means relocating to her place.
Over the past 6 months, Kyah’s been on a borrowing spree: tools, ladders, and even the OP’s Wi-Fi password, which is basically modern-day gold. Our OP was patient, polite, and honestly way more generous than some of us would be. But after chasing down her own screwdriver set, she had officially reached her limit.
So, when she bumped into Kyah at the local grocery store, she decided it was time to put an end to the “borrowing.” Kyah loaded up on goodies like snacks, beer, the works, but apparently she had forgotten her wallet. Whoopsie. But instead of putting some stuff back, she turned to the OP, asking her to pay for her $85 groceries, promising to give the money back the same day.
The OP calmly said she’d cover $20 to help her get essentials, but she couldn’t fork out the full $85, especially when Kyah’s cart was more party snacks than food. Kyah got salty, grabbed what she could afford with pocket change, and has since been icing the OP out, calling her stingy to anyone who would listen.
Image credits: Liza Summer / Pexels (not the actual photo)
So, the OP feels a little guilty for saying no. But see, saying “no” doesn’t make you a bad person; it makes you a person with boundaries. But some folks really have a hard time with saying no, especially those cotton-hearted ones. The pros say many people struggle to say no because they are afraid of being rejected. But this is what makes them overcommit and neglect their own needs.
The trick to delivering a firm “no” is assertiveness. Keep it short and sweet: no long explanations, no over-apologizing. Simple, direct, done. Practice your “no” in front of the mirror if you have to – bonus points if you add a smile.
Because there is a big difference between being kind and being taken advantage of. If “just this once” keeps turning into every other day, you might have a kindness moocher on your hands. If they only call when they need something, “forget” to return your stuff, butter you up with compliments or guilt-trip you when you hesitate, they might be using you.
But there are ways to spot those folks. First, ask yourself if the favors go both ways. If the scale’s permanently tipped in their favor, congratulations, you’ve got yourself a user, not a friend. It’s better to cut them off before it impacts your ability to trust other people in the future. And hey, if they ever ask for your Netflix login again, just smile and say, “Sure, right after you return my ladder.”
What do you think of this story? Is the poster a jerk for not paying for her neighbor’s groceries? Share your thoughts and comments below!
Netizens side with the woman, saying she is not the jerk for refusing to pay for her neighbor’s groceries
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