Prepare yourselves, dear Pandas, we’re about to journey into one of the most shadowy and hilarious corners of the internet—into the vast Cringe Empire, home of the elusive, socially inept neckbeards. Known for their poor hygiene, misogynistic points of view, [ahem] ‘interesting’ style choices, love of anime, katanas, body pillows, and Japanese culture, these fedora-wearing individuals are called neckbeards.
A pejorative term, it lightly pokes fun at those geeks who have over-inflated egos (and more than occasionally—over-inflated tummies), are often misogynistic, call people “m’lady,” and believe that acting like a functioning member of society is more of a recommendation than a requirement. Whether or not they have a beard on their necks or in their hearts is beside the point. All that matters is the beard in their soul.
One place that publicly shames the most cringeworthy neckbeards is the ‘Just Neckbeard Things’ subreddit, a community of nearly 809k members. It’s an online group “for mocking those who adorn their necks with proud man fur.” And I love their tagline which is “barba non philisophum facit” which roughly translated from Latin means “one’s beard does not make a philosopher.”
Have a look through some of the subreddit’s funniest and quirkiest posts about neckbeards, upvote the ones that made you laugh, and be sure to give the online group a visit if you enjoyed their stuff. Onwards, dear Readers! Just remember not to touch anyone’s fedora—it makes them… angry.
Plenty of neckbeards eat very poorly, move very little, and stereotypically subsist on Doritos and Mountain Dew, which means their health isn’t up to scratch. Bored Panda reached out to fitness expert Jack Bly to hear his take on what we can do to improve our health and fitness if we feel that it’s negatively impacting the quality of our lives. You’ll find his insights below.
#1 Women And Their… *shuffles Deck* …pants!
Image source: reddit.com
#2 Where’s The Lie?
Image source: EndlessTrashposter
#3 Those Red Caps Are The New Fedoras
Image source: reddit.com
#4 “They’ll Understand Me In Japan”
Image source: jojoreffeence_ass
#5 Just A Friendly Reminder!
Image source: daisycow5
#6 Graphs Don’t Lie
Image source: peas8carrots
#7 Say It Again Louder For The People At The Back
Image source: reddit.com
#8 Accurate
Image source: Waffles_Remix
#9 A Nice Shot Of The Pastor Who Told Wives To Lose Weight And Look More Feminine
Image source: jdc5294
#10 It’s Hard Out Here For A Neckbeard Trying To Find The Proper M’lady
Image source: MrJohnnyQuest
#11 This Is Fake, Right?
Image source: eredin_breac_glas
#12 Local Board Game Shop Fighting Back The Neckbeards
Image source: ChocolateBicBic
#13 Revenge Of The Nerd
Image source: Sublimeat
#14 My Doctoral Thesis
Image source: ConnorsTumblrAccount
#15 Hi Beautiful
Image source: Ewfah
#16 Females Deserted Us
Image source: scherrzando
#17 When Your Euphoria Hits Other Players
Image source: MladysWhiteKnight
#18 Just Chilling In Moms Basement
Image source: The_Mix_Kid_x
#19 How Do You Go 62 Days Without A Shower??
Image source: infinitytacos989
#20 Hopefully This Brings As Much Joy To You As It Did Me. 100% My Brother And His Friends
Image source: SYCKB0I
#21 I Can Respect That
Image source: bennjill
#22 Not Even Satan Wants Neckbeards
Image source: alaa_lol0
#23 If You Want A “Strong” Woman, You’re Gay!
Image source: MetsFan113
#24 Wanna Hear A Scary Story, M’lady?
Image source: AtlantaBoyz
#25 I Wonder What She Did
Image source: Gingold
#26 F You Then
Image source: richieZEB00
#27 I Think This Belongs Here..
Image source: foof182
#28 My Boyfriend And I Dressed As A Neckbeard And His Waifu For Halloween
Image source: GracefullyLiv
#29 The Market Decided…
Image source: TealStarRanger
#30 So Accurate It Hurts
Image source: neonfiona
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