When your job comes with a roof over your head, how much of your independence are you expected to give up?
That’s the question people are pondering after someone shared the story of a live-in nanny who is locking horns with her employer. The nanny apparently goes out to dinner with friends on her nights off and arrives back around 10pm. The boss feels this is inappropriate and now wants to impose a curfew. Netizens are divided.
What initially seemed like a great job has turned sour for one live-in nanny
Image credits: Andrej Lišakov / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Her employer has decided bedtime isn’t just for children and believes that she too should have a curfew
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: NotableI
Image credits: Yunus Tuğ / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
“Two worlds coming together for the sake of the children”: what the experts have to say…
Balancing parenting, work and everything else life throws at you can be tough. For those who have the luxury of money and space, a live-in nanny can be an option.
A live-in nanny’s job description differs from that of a live-out nanny, notes nanny placement agency Hello, Nanny. “She is there when the kiddos wake up. She’s there when you have an emergency or a last-minute meeting you have to attend. If a child is sick and can’t go to school – she’s there,” explains the site.
The agency adds that there is a level of mutual respect and vulnerability on both sides. The employer is trusting someone to enter their private world. The nanny is trusting the family to let them in.
Many people might worry about issues like privacy when it comes to hiring a live-in nanny.
“That’s where both parties come together and hash out an agreement. This happens before the nanny gets placed,” advises Hello, Nanny. “The family can let the nanny know that there are certain times/days they will be together as a family. And the nanny does the same. This arrangement of living in the same house works best when both sides voice their priorities and place healthy boundaries before moving in happens.”
The agency warns that communication is key to ensuring a successful working and living arrangement.
“Does the nanny want the weekends to herself? Make it known. Does the family expect the nanny to eat dinner with them every night? Ask her if she’s ok with that. It’s not unrealistic. It’s two worlds coming together for the sake of the children. When you both compromise and have your expectations voiced, the pairing process is easier,” say the agency’s experts.
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
What about curfews? Can you impose one on your live-in nanny?
“Nannies don’t usually want to be told that they have to be home by a certain time at night, especially at weekends,” notes award-winning London-based nanny agency Homebodies.
But the agency adds that there if you have want certain rules followed, it’s best to discuss them with the nanny upfront.
“For example, you might want to turn on your house alarm before you go to sleep at night. If the nanny gets back late, that might be an issue,” explains the Homebodies site. “Equally, if you know your nanny needs to start work at 7 am, and she’s out late the night before, you may worry she’s not on her best form for work if she hasn’t had enough sleep.”
Again, communication is key. And Homebodies advises having an open and honest conversation with your nanny regarding curfews to make sure that both parties are on the same page.
“Absolutely nuts”: many people felt the employer was being unreasonable
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