Being born a man in this century seems to be something that can be used against you at the turn of a hat, or the drop of an angry ex-wife’s carefully worded rant about you. Some men might deserve it because let’s face it, men aren’t any more perfect than women when it comes to many things in life, but the case of Joss Whedon, whose contributions to feminism in the form of Buffy the Vampire Slayer have earned him high praise and much attention, it seems that things aren’t so black and white.
The director’s ex-wife Kai Cole has decided to go on record by stating that she believed her husband at the time was over and through with their marriage long before it ended and was supposedly sleeping with his actresses, co-workers, fans, and friends. She even went on to state that keeping this secret for fifteen years caused her Complex PTSD. While no one wants to really deny that she might in fact have an issue like PTSD, the actual C-PTSD is typically caused by abuse and neglect of the sort that is quite violent and usually endured throughout one’s childhood. Seeing as how Kai Cole has been an adult for the last fifteen years this kind of blows that theory out of the water.
One thing that does back up her claim though is that suspicion of a spouse can in fact cause a very big number of psychological problems, though PTSD is usually not one of them unless this kind of thing has been ongoing for years. And unfortunately for Cole this seems like something that she could have ended far quicker before it got this bad. Fortunately it does not sound as though there was any abuse, but tragically the marriage ended in 2012. But once again it’s a little confusing that she is just speaking up now. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that she isn’t emotionally hurt in some way, but half a decade after the marriage ends seems like a rather long time to wait and denounce your ex-husband as a fraud in any sense.
While Whedon hasn’t really offered any defense, which is curious since a lot of innocent people would gladly stand up and give their own set of reasons why it’s not true, there is some doubt that remains in light of Cole’s words. Five years, as I’ve said, is a long time to sit on that kind of information and just let it stew. If she was truly going to let that bomb drop, why not do it earlier when Whedon’s success was just building? I hate to say this, but it almost sounds like she might not have gotten much in a divorce settlement and is trying to get a little extra now that Whedon has proven that he can maintain a long line of successes.
Yes it’s a terrible thought but unfortunately in this day and age, when the “gimmees” are out in full force, it is a concern that needs to be voiced. Joss Whedon might be everything his ex-wife says, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that he’s still a great director. His character is something that’s best left out of the tabloids.
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