It’s assumed that a parent will love their child unconditionally. But sometimes, that’s far from the truth — at least for some youngsters who identify as LGBTQ+.
Coming out can literally cost them the love of their parents and even the roof over their heads.
A man shared a similar story online, revealing how he was disowned and kicked out of the house by his family for being gay.
Now, years later, his mother is contemplating reaching out for financial support.
A man said he was kicked out of the house by his family for being gay
Image credits: Image-Source/Envato (not the actual photo)
Now his parents want to reconnect years later because they need financial help
Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages/Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: hayyy_jude
Many LGBTQ+ people still face stigma and misunderstanding
Even though same-gender marriages are now legal in nearly 40 countries, stigma around being LGBTQ+ has not disappeared.
LGBTQ+ is an umbrella acronym for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer (or questioning) communities.
As of early 2025, about 9.3% of US adults identified as LGBTQ+, which works out to roughly 31.7 million people. The number is driven by younger generations, with over 20% of Gen Z adults saying they are part of the community.
While legal rights are gradually changing, social attitudes seem to be taking much longer.
Not that long ago, being gay was actually considered a medical problem. Back in 1952, the American Psychiatric Association called it a “sociopathic personality disturbance.” By 1968, it was relabeled as a kind of “deviation.”
It wasn’t until 1973 that it was finally taken off the list of mental illnesses — but the stigma hasn’t gone away.
A lot of it comes down to how deeply rooted beliefs around gender, religion, and family roles are.
“Pointing fingers and laying blame doesn’t give us a path forward, and ultimately, understanding who perpetuated the status quo is less important than understanding that the core problem is ignorance and working to fight ignorance the only way we can: with education,” says Jae Alexis Lee, an advocate for LGBTQ+ rights.
Image credits: daniel james/Unsplash (not the actual photo)
When rejection and judgment come from home, the impact can last for years
A recent analysis found LGBTQ+ people are about five times more likely than non‑LGBTQ+ people to experience violent victimization, including hate crimes.
Other research shows that 39% of LGBTQ+ employees in the UK still feel they need to hide their identity at work.
But for many people, especially young adults, the rejection begins at home.
Research shows that “coming out” to one’s parents and close family members can be an important developmental milestone in one’s orientation or gender identity journey.
In a Human Rights Campaign youth report, over half (57.4%) of LGBTQ+ youth reported at least one negative or rejecting experience from family members. It included shaming, punishment, or rejection after coming out.
“Parents and families have an important role to play in the lives of their LGBTQ+ children. Family support can be one of the strongest assets and sources of confidence and resilience LGBTQ+ youth have — or, in its absence, the biggest threat to LGBTQ+ youth’s ability to live safely, happily, and openly as their true authentic selves,” the report said.
Even in countries that are often seen as progressive, the gap between legal equality and social acceptance is clear.
A survey found that about a quarter of adults in the UK would not feel proud if their child came out as LGBTQ+.
More than one in 10 said they would be uncomfortable living at home with their lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender child.
The reasons parents give vary. For some, it is religion. For others, it is fear of social judgment or concern about “what will people say.” Sometimes, it can also be just a lack of understanding or exposure.
Research shows that young people who face family rejection are much more likely to struggle with anxiety, depression, and self‑harm.
Around 73% of LGBTQ+ youth say they experience anxiety, and about 58% say they have symptoms of depression — much higher than their peers who feel accepted.
Surveys also show that up to 40% of young people experiencing homelessness in the US identify as LGBTQ+, even though they are a much smaller share of the overall youth population.
It can be much harder to deal with toxic family members
The psychological damage of being treated badly by parents cannot be understated.
Toxic family behavior shows up when people are cruel, controlling, or constantly critical, or when they don’t respect your feelings or needs.
“Set some boundaries around what you need in order to feel safe and heard. Maybe that sounds intense, but it’s really just about establishing ground rules that create healthier interactions with each other. It also means coming up with plans you’ll see through if your boundary is violated,” says psychologist and author Sherrie Campbell.
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Experts say the goal of a toxic person is to control you and break you down so that you can be easily manipulated.
In cases where family relationships simply get too toxic, some adults may choose to permanently disengage or cut off family members to protect their own well-being and psychological health.
Experts say very simple things — like support from family and friends, seeing representation in media, and having your gender expression and pronouns respected — can have a huge positive impact on the mental health of an LGBTQ+ person.
The man responded to comments by readers and gave some more insight into his family’s dynamics
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