We’ve all heard the saying, “If you can dream it, you can do it.” It’s the mantra of small business owners and ambitious entrepreneurs all over the world. But what if your dream is to be an astronaut food taster? Or perhaps you want to be a professional owl psychologist or even a roller-coaster tester!
If your dream job sounds as crazy as these ones, then congratulations! You’ve just stumbled onto a list of funny job titles that, despite how crazy they may sound, are actually real — or used to be, since some of our submissions are jobs that don’t exist anymore (sigh).
While some people would scoff at these aspirations and say it’s not possible to make a living out of them, others found ways to make it happen and gave life to brand-new unusual jobs. So if you’re feeling down because your dream job doesn’t seem like it will ever become a reality, take heart! These funny jobs may be the sign you need.
We’ve rounded up the most absurd jobs and put them together for your viewing pleasure. Others, instead, are just more original ways to refer to your super normal job, because we all need more fun while on the clock. Whether you’re looking for inspiration for your next career move or want to see just how weird things can get in the job market, this list will surely tickle your fancy — and maybe even inspire some new business ideas!
#1
Fake Mourner
Description: A person who cries for you at a funeral.
#2
Qualified Unskilled Personnel
Description: A politician.
#3
Computer Whisperer
Description: Technical computer cleaning professional.
#4
Dittybopper
Description: Someone who communicates by Morse Code.
#5
Oven mechanic
Description: An OB-GYN.
#6
Dream Alchemist
Description: The head of marketing.
#7
Official Recipient Of Awkward Morning Greetings
Description: Building security.
#8
Dinosaur Duster
Description: Getting paid to dust dirty dinosaurs at a museum.
#9
Space lawyer
Description: A lawyer that drafts international treaties and national laws about engaging in space exploration.
#10
Mail Escort
Description: A mailman.
#11
A Firefighter Positioned in the Arctic
Description:
“There’s a fire!”
“Yeah, right.”
#12
Golf Ball Diver
Description: Pond diver at the golf course.
#13
Crayon Crusader
Description: a graphic designer.
#14
Coordinator Of Interpretive Teaching
Description: A museum tour guide.
#15
Scuba-Diving Pizza-Delivery Man
Description: The person who delivers pizza to underwater hotels.
#16
LinkedIn Browser
Description: The recruiter.
#17
Coffee Shortage Scapegoat
Description: Office manager.
#18
Chief Chatter
Description: Call centre manager.
#19
Legal Bank Robber
Description: Someone who tests how easy it is to penetrate bank security.
#20
VP of Idea Stalling
Description: A CEO.
#21
Knowledge Navigator
Description: A teacher.
#22
Creativity Analyst
Description: An assistant marketing manager.
#23
Accounting Ninja
Description: A financial manager.
#24
Document Imaging Specialist
Description: A photocopier.
#25
Lifeguard at the Olympics
Description: Do you need help, Mr. Phelps?
#26
Class Pet
Description: All you have to do is eat, and sleep.
#27
Cowpuncher
Description: A hired hand who tends cattle and performs other duties on horseback.
#28
Senior Kindle Evangelist
Description: In charge of all things ‘Kindle’ for Amazon.
#29
Ice Rink Hand-Holder
Description: Ice Rink Hand-Holder.
#30
Problem Wrangler
Description: A counselor.
#31
Space consultant
Description: A real estate agent.
#32
Professional Conference Attender
Description: The Brand ambassador.
#33
Ventriloquist
Description: A person creates the illusion that their voice is coming from elsewhere into a full-time career.
#34
Foot-Holder
Description: Medieval Welsh kings employed a foot-holder whose duty it was to rub his feet.
#35
Flashlight Holder
Description: If your parents are working on something in the dark, and you have to stand behind them with the tool of light.
#36
Retail Jedi
Description: Shop Assistant.
#37
Chief Ego Operator
Description: Any executive position.
#38
Animal Colourist
Description: This person dyes animals for movies and marketing campaigns.
#39
Penetration Tester
Description: One who ensures the online integrity or security of a network.
#40
Cutpurses
Description: A pickpocket.
#41
Hair Boiler
Description: Someone who boils animal hair until it curls.
#42
Oyster Floater
Description: Someone who floats oysters in water until they are free of impurities.
#43
Transparency Enhancement Facilitator
Description: A window cleaner.
#44
Director of First Impressions
Description: A receptionist.
#45
Electromagnetic Wrangler Extraordinaire
Description: General IT specialist.
#46
Underwater Ceramic Technician
Description: A dishwasher.
#47
Freelance Student
Description: A person who studies on his own after a day job.
#48
Liquid Fossil Transfer Technician
Description: Gas station attendant.
#49
Rental Boyfriend
Description: A fake boyfriend who can go out on a date with a woman and pretend to be her boyfriend for the contracted time.
#50
Ambassador of Buzz
Description: Corporate communications associate.
#51
Sanitation Engineer
Description: Garbage man.
#52
Education Center Nourishment Consultant
Description: The lunch lady.
#53
Señor System Administrator
Description: System Administrator.
#54
Groom of the King’s Close Stool
Description: A trusted man whose job it was to wipe the king’s bottom.
#55
Slubberdoffer
Description: Refers to a person in the textile industry who removes bobbins on a slubbing machine.
#56
Associate to the Executive Manager of Marketeering and Conservation Efforts
Description: Marketing Assistant
#57
Conversation Architect
Description: Digital marketing manager.
#58
Colon Lover
Description: Writer, editor of the written word.
#59
Lead Facilitator of Alcohol-Related Terminations
Description: Events coordinator.
#60
Light Bender
Description: Someone who is responsible for the high-tech, precision job of making neon lights.
#61
Snake Milker
Description: Someone who extracts venom from snakes.
#62
Phlebotomist
Description: The people that draw your blood at the hospital, aka vampires.
#63
Herpetologist
Description: Someone who studies frogs (and reptiles and other amphibians).
#64
Haberdasher
Description: A dealer in men’s clothing and accessories.
#65
Coffee Sommelier
Description: A barista.
#66
Wet Leisure Attendant
Description: A Lifeguard.
#67
Urban Herbalist
Description: A florist, who only sells one kind of plant.
#68
Sandwich Artists
Description: A person who works in fast-food restaurants and delis where they prepare sandwiches according to customers’ orders.
#69
Media Distribution Officer
Description: Paper boy or girl.
#70
Pet Food Tester
Description: Evaluates the nutritional value of pet food and, yes, taste-test it.
#71
Bike Fishermen
Description: A person who fishes bicycles out of canals.
#72
Passenger Pusher
Description: Japan has employed people to push others onto trains.
#73
Nightlife Entrepreneur
Descriptions: a club promoter.
#74
Mobile Sustenance Facilitator
Description: A person who works at a food truck.
#75
Human Alarm Clock
Description: Prior to alarm clocks, people with big sticks would wake other people up by tapping at their windows.
#76
Beverage Dissemination Officer
Description: Bartender.
#77
Twisted Brother
Description: Balloon Artist.
#78
Bosser Arounder
Description: Someone who tells you what you can and can’t do.
#79
Carny
Description: A traveling carnival employee.
#80
Tonsorial Artist
Description: a hair stylist.
#81
Cheese Sprayer
Description: Someone who sprays cheese or butter by hand on popcorn.
#82
Grand Master of Underlings
Description: Deputy Manager.
#83
Master of Disaster
Description: PR crisis manager.
#84
Champion of Sun
Description: A person who studies the Sun.
#85
Full Stack Pancake
Description: A full stack developer.
#86
Marker of the Swans
Description: Someone who, quite literally, marks all of the swans.
#87
Chief Inspiration Officer
Description: Encouraging ‘belief in the company’ and ‘internal evangelism of its values.’
#88
Pneumatic Device and Machine Optimizer
Description: A factory worker.
#89
Waking Night Support Worker
Description: A support worker who does the night shift.
#90
Cat Behaviour Consultant
Description: Someone who specializes in preventing, managing, and modifying challenging behaviors in cats.
#91
Sidekick Clairvoyant
Description: Assistant to the psychic.
#92
Expert Toilet Attendant
Description: A person who instructs you how to wash your hands in a public toilet.
#93
Director of Making People Happy and Content
Description: An HR manager.
#94
Lunch Bill Payer
Description: An account executive.
#95
Collector of Business Cards
Description: Business Development Rep.
#96
Professional Lazer Tager
Description: A person whose job it is to play with children at lazer tag parties if not enough people show up.
#97
Shredded Cheese Authority
Description: Shredded cheese quality assurance.
#98
Piccoloist
Description: A person who plays piccolo, sometimes called a pickler, usually called annoying.
#99
Head Honcho
Description: The person in charge.
#100
Naked Therapist
Description: A stripper.
#101
Initiative Officer
Description: A planner.
#102
Gift Skaters
Description: A person who collects flowers, stuffed animals, and other gifts that are thrown onto skating rinks after a performance.
#103
Head of Schmoozing
Description: VP of business development.
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