“Getting the ick” is a modern way of describing those little (or not so little) things one’s partner may do that are just major turn-offs. Often it’s associated with petty, personal preferences, but there are folks out there who’s behavior is so gross that it’s a wonder anyone dated them. Someone asked “What’s the most disgusting thing a partner has ever done (or didn’t do) and was it a deal breaker?” and people detailed their worst stories.
Normally, a list like this is a great thing to enjoy over breakfast, but in this particular case, be warned, it gets gross. Otherwise, get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to share your own tales of woe in the comments below.
#1
Saw him scrapping the fuzz off his dirty teeth and wipe it on his couch after not brushing his teeth all weekend.
Image source: tacolamae, Shedrack Salami/unsplash
#2
I had an ex leave skid marks in my bed. I’ve never gotten the ick so quickly.
Image source: Positive-Avocado-881, Vitaly Gariev/unsplash
#3
When I was in high school, I “dated” a guy for about 3 weeks. I put it in quotes because we hardly saw each other outside of school. Anyway, for the one real date we had, we went to his cousins house and went mudding on 4 wheelers. We were a mess. His cousin wanted to go out to eat at a nice restaurant, and I said I needed to go home, shower, and change first. They both looked at me like I was crazy and his cousin said I could borrow his girlfriend’s clothes. We go inside, and they grab a couple of towels, spit on them, and start wiping the mud off themselves. Then they handed me a towel to do the same. I asked where the clothes I could pick from were so I could go in the bathroom and get cleaned up and changed. They pointed me to a pile of clothes on the floor covered in cat and dog poop. I told them I would just wear what I had on and wipe the mud off it when I cleaned up. I went into the bathroom and called my best friend in a panic. She told me to put the phone on speaker phone while walking out of the bathroom, so I did.
She immediately started crying about her dad not having shown up for visitation. They guys knew her and knew her dad was a deadbeat and that she had issues because of it, so it was believable. At that point, even I was halfway believing her. I told my date I needed to go be emotional support for her, and both guys agreed. He took me to her house and dropped me off, and I just ghosted him after that.
Image source: Fabulous_Fortune1762, jesse orrico/unsplash
#4
I went to college with a guy and he invited me over to his dorm room for movies and dinner. He was making us burgers that night. Before preparing the food, he had just gotten out the bathroom after being in there for 20 min. I heard the toilet flush, but then the door opened. He didn’t wash his hands. When I saw that I started to grab my things. THEN he then went directly into the kitchen. After not washing his hands, he proceeded to grab some cheese. The cheese had green small spots on them. It was beginning to mold. He told me it was good since it was small, and STILL USE THEM. I don’t remember what I told him, but I ran out of there.
Image source: Bride1234109, Getty Images/unsplash
#5
My ex would regularly pick his nose. No matter how much I told him I hated it. Let me explain it to you. He would do it… In front of our friends. Right in the middle of a house party. It was disgusting and embarrassing and he had some weird a*s vacant look on his face when he would do it. Oh thank God I never married that guy. .
Image source: jessness024, Natalia Blauth/unsplash
#6
Dated a girl one time. 3rd date she soiled her pants.
It didn’t occur to me just how clingy she was. I thought I smelled something foul while we were at the mall but figured it was someone’s baby.
It wasn’t until we were back in my car and I noticed that the smell was now strong, so I checked my feet and asked her to check hers when she let it slip that she soiled her pants.
At this point, I was expecting a fart gone wrong and a little escaped.
No, she told me that she didn’t want to leave my side but couldn’t hold it anymore and hoped I wouldn’t notice.
At this point, I knew this relationship was OVER. An accident I could accept. Birthing a mud monster in your pants because you didn’t want to leave my side for a few minutes is way too clingy for me.
The phone calls every day didn’t bother me. The long chats didn’t bother me. Her wanting me to come over all the time didn’t bother me. It was a lot, but not suffocating. This though? This tells me the moment she gets access to any of my electronic devices, she’s going to scour them for any traces of any other girls and lose it when she finds something. I have a few female friends that I chat with, nothing serious, mostly former coworkers that I share interests with.
Image source: anon, Getty Images/unsplash
#7
My ex didn’t shower regularly when we first got together. One time it was a hot summer day and I was spending the weekend with him. He had the fan going and the window open. He was just in a t shirt and some loose boxers. Every time the fan turned and it flowed it my direction it smelled like hot garbage. I told him, I know it’s hot but I think we need to close the window, it must be garbage day and it smells horrible. Like it’s making me nauseous. He was upwind and I was downwind…you see where this is going.
He turns to me and says “garbage day was 2 days ago” and right then I realized it was him. I told him he needed to shower now or I’m leaving. He got better about showering regularly over time.
Image source: RandyButternubsYo, Adolfo Félix/unsplash
#8
I married a man who had bad breath often and it only got worse after we said our vows. I realized he didn’t brush his teeth properly, he never flossed, and he used mouthwash with alcohol in place of brushing sometimes, when he did brush it was usually first thing in the morning and he had sweet coffee right after, so his teeth never got a break. He claimed he inherited bad teeth from his mother. I tried for years to gently push him to practice better oral care but he refused. It still makes me laugh now, he thinks he’s so amazing because he makes decent money, but his breath is horrendous and I love knowing he’s out there making people cringe on a regular basis, it smells like garbage water and feces and it permeates the air around him.
Image source: CandidNumber, Sander Sammy/unsplash
#9
Not really personal hygiene, but, still…..
My (ex) husband and I are nurses. He started out (as many of us do) on an inpatient floor. He would come home after a 12 hr shift, walk to the cabinet, crab a sleeve of cookies, walk to our bedroom, and with shoes and scrubs on, lie on the bed and eat the cookies off his chest.
Bed bugs. Bed 👏 bugs 👏 . Scabies. Maggots. Bruh.
To others nurses…. Y’all would understand. I don’t think the typical person knows how much bodily fluids we get on ourselves through a shift.
Image source: ExpensivePatience5, Getty Images/unsplash
#10
I got into his car after he spent the night and he started eating old fries that were left in his car. I found it gross, but didn’t break up with him because of it.
Image source: tbird–, Elisabeth Jurenka/unsplash
#11
I had an ex spit his gum into my mouth while we were making out.
I had no idea he had gum in his mouth. He just…. pushed a thoroughly chewed, flavorless gob of gum into my mouth with a decent amount of spit.
I remember immediately and involuntarily violently sputtering and spitting it out directly into his face.
He got angry with me for hacking and spitting all over his face and was absolutely clueless as to why I didn’t find what he did hot or s**y. 🫠.
Image source: Angsty_Potatos, Getty Images/unsplash
#12
In my past life (college), had a guy I was dating come visit overnight. He stayed for three days, totally unplanned, just laid up in the room while I went to class. He didn’t bring a change of clothes, a toiletries bag, nor did he ask for a shower. I went to school in the city and he had a car so we were surrounded by stores. Also, he only lived 20 minutes away 😂so it’s wasn’t a desperate stranded situation either. I asked him to leave bc he would have just stayed there laying around. the fact that he was comfortable being that funky and ALSO didn’t have anything to do for 3 day was 🚩 🚩🚩.
Image source: Mountain_Novel_7668, Curated Lifestyle/unsplash
#13
He was really, really into spit as a f****h. Wanted to spit into each other’s mouths and like, on each other. Not trying to kink shame, but that was a huge sensory Nope for me. It’s not why things ended, but I was not a fan of that and I don’t miss it.
Image source: Free-Government5162
#14
Oh god this sub scares me my ex wasn’t the cleanest he never smelled too bad but he wouldn’t shower for 3 days or so and he smoked so yeah. Now my bf showers twice a day longer then me sometimes and actually always reminds me to brush my teeth at night even when I get sleepy 😂love him for that. Also I used wipes here and there but I was so pleasantly surprised when I moved in and he’s alwyas got wipes stocked on the back of the toilet.
Image source: burningcandlesz
#15
I was on a date with This guy and we hung out at his house after eating Mexican food. He went to the bathroom but when he came out and laid on the couch with me, he smelled like actual s**t. Not a bad fart or lingering poop, but like he had actual poop hanging off of him.
The smell was just getting worse and I was shocked that he was still lying there like nothing was happening. I made up a lie and said my mom needed me home asap to watch my little sister cus she had to work night shift (my mom was a dentist lol but I always used this line).
He walked me out and the smell followed us all the way down the stairs and out of the house.
When he turned back to leave, I saw there was smeared s**t on the back of his shorts!!!
I don’t get why he never got up to check at any point because we both smelled him.
He still tried to go out with me after but I never saw him again. Idk if it was a one time accident or if that happened often.
Image source: Ravenclawriddles, Curated Lifestyle/unsplash
#16
He asked me repeatedly to go into the bathroom with him why he was s******g but always had a reason like oh, you can come brush your teeth now, can you get me some TP I’m almost out, or come get something from him all of which he would say and never would mention what he was actually doing in there. So I would walk in and he would just make causal conversation with me while on there.
Image source: kkeojyeo22, Getty Images/unsplash
#17
Among a plethora of horrendous habits like not cleaning his beard after dropping food in it and not taking a bath for a few months (there was no intimacy after I found out he wouldn’t clean his clothes even after the smell became horrid,) there was one thing that just sealed the ick deal. He had a plastic insulated coffee cup with a lid that had a plastic straw in it. He believed that he shouldn’t clean that cup no matter what because the bacterial buildup would inoculate him against colds and flu. I think that he was partially right. He didn’t see too many people daily, usually his mother once every 6 months and the convenience store clerk where he bought his ciggies.
I couldn’t stop thinking of coffee cheese harbored in hot cars.
Image source: ritlingit, Getty Images/unsplash
#18
I was laying on his chest and noticed that his belly button had a thick, black layer of gunk so thick that you couldn’t see any skin inside his belly button. I will never forget the day. He also would go weeks without washing his hair cuz it “styled better when it was greasy”. Sorry but to this day, he still disgusts me and I wish I could tell him.
Image source: 26chickenwings, Sandra Seitamaa/unsplash
#19
My ex had a recurrent athletes foot infection, and after his second reinfection he gave up fighting it (that was before we met). By the time we got together he’d had it for years, to the point where many of his toenails were affected. It was so bad that it took months of treatment for it to go away (after I got on his case about it and told him he HAD to get rid of it). Oh and also there were white stains on his black quilt that he hadn’t washed for what must have been months.
Image source: Dependent_Thought523
#20
He ate his pimples/whiteheads/blackheads/etc.
Image source: GothicMomLife, KÜRŞAT GÜNEY/unsplash
#21
I have dumped no less than three men in my life for not cleaning their bathrooms. It’s not enough to clean yourself if the room in which you do so looks like it’s sponsored by Staph Infections R’ Us.
Image source: TheInternaton
#22
A guy wasn’t brushing his teeth every day and it grossed me out so bad I couldn’t kiss him and just broke up with him. Please, brush your teeth ppl and use soap EVERYWHERE!!
Image source: anon, Vitaly Gariev/unsplash
#23
Didn’t brush her teeth for the 3 months we dated, wouldn’t shower for a day or two, has the most insane body I could of ever wanted and.. it wasn’t worth it in the end lol.
Image source: anon
#24
So. We were at this beautiful island resort.
Turquoise water, palm trees, excursions on catamarans.
The last night we were there he left the entire back of the toilet coated in poop splatter.
It was like Basquiat.
I confronted him, told him to clean it. There was a toilet brush, right there.
He refused. Made a bunch of lame excuses, tried to gaslight me. Gave me a bunch of attitude and got in my face.
Obviously there were deep-seated issues with this guy, but this stands out as especially gross.
Image source: cutsforluck, Vitaly Gariev/unsplash
#25
My ex had/has swamp feet, couldn’t understand when we were intimate and he took his boots/socks off that I became extremely nauseous.
Image source: Original_Flounder_18, Philippe Murray-Pietsch/unsplash
#26
Well, my friend set me up with her boyfriends friend: 4 of us were going to go on his friends boat.
I thought Great I love boats. This will be nice. She kept telling me for two days prior how much he was Looking forward to meeting me, etc.,
So I’m looking forward to the double date, some cocktails, etc.
I arrive and I get on his boat and it is absolutely disgusting. The Cuddy was full of junk food bags everything. Empty cans etc.
seriously you would’ve thought that I showed up two hours early and he didn’t get a chance to pick up and clean or something. Disgusting, and smelled.
Once everybody arrived and we got going, we were talking about our day and he actually said as one of the things he did that day was to pick up the boat, clean up etc.
No 2nd date.
I’m glad he showed who he really was out of the gate I guess but very disappointed.
Image source: parker3309
#27
Wasn’t a partner, but this is definitely a deal breaker.
I’m a dude. Was in the restroom to take a leak. Another dude was in the stall puttin in work. Full sound effects, everything. I’m done, head to the sink and I’m looking down and washing my hands. As I lookup and turn off the faucet, dude walks behind me and right out the door. We were the only ones in the restroom. Never shook his hand again! And I told everyone that came into contact with him. That’s just gross!
Image source: anon
#28
Ok so the gross person is me in this case: we had this weight loss contest at work so I bought smooth move lax tea to give me an edge on the competition. Slammed like 2 cups back to back because I didn’t think it would work and I wanted to be skinny mini for weigh in the following morning.
Oh did I mention I was staying over my ex Apt that night? We had been dating for about 4 months at the time.
So yeah basically we went to bed and I s**t it. Not amber heard level but there was leakage. I personally freaked out. Things went downhill after that point.
Image source: spicychcknsammy
#29
My ex girlfriend from highschool would freebleed regularly and leave the bloodied up underwear on the floor/bed/and laundry hamper for sometimes up to weeks to the point many pairs were thrown away.
Image source: curlylip44
#30
When I was 18 I was dating this guy. The one time I stayed at his place I went to go to the bathroom and there was no toilet paper. None. Anywhere. And his roommate was female. Bathroom was also disgusting. I used the had towel, threw it in the trash and dipped.
Image source: uarstar
#31
My first bf literally leaned over the bed, grabbed an empty Gatorade bottle, and pissed in it instead of getting up to use the bathroom. He said all guys have done this at least once in their life and that it’s normal. I didn’t believe him.
Did he immediately throw the bottle away? Nope, just put the lid back on and set it down on the floor next to the bed.
I’m ashamed to say this wasn’t the deal breaker, but we didn’t last much longer after that.
Image source: chickintheblack
#32
My ex husband thought farts were so funny (to be fair, they are) but one time he thought it would be EXTRA funny to pull his pants down quick and rip one in my face. Bare-a*s. It happened so fast i had no time to react, at the same time tho- in almost slow motion- i watched a little speck of s**t fly out of his cheeks and land on my face.
MORTIFIED i screamed and ran to the shower, spent probably 2 hours in there. Left him shortly after. He was gross in many, many ways.
Image source: Icy-Horror8072
#33
First time I went to this lasses house when I was about 17, I was in her bed and there was a used period pad under her pillow.
Image source: Only_trans_
#34
This isn’t nearly as bad as other stories on here, but I dated a guy who wouldn’t wash his feet before getting into bed at night. Wouldn’t be so bad if we didn’t work outside all day, every day, rain or shine. The bottoms of his feet would be nearly black with dirt and he would hop into bed like it was nothing. It was so, so disgusting.
ETA: he would wear adventure sandals most days (chacos, keens, etc), so those feet got dirty dirty.
Image source: astrongerpeyote
#35
Briefly dated a man who would wipe after a bowel movement in the shower.. I get doing a thorough wash after wiping to be super clean but he left s**t chunks in there for me to find and had no shame and told me to just waffle stomp them down the drain like he usually does. WHUT?😶.
Image source: Lasvegasnurse71
#36
Begged me to defecate on him 🥴 still one of the most attractive guys I’ve ever done too. It’s who u least expect.
Image source: gowillahant
#37
Having to beg my ex boyfriend to brush his teeth- I literally had to watch him do it or he wouldn’t. He also wasn’t aware that you needed to brush your tongue ??
He also smoked batch bowls daily and would throw up in the sink all over the dishes daily and not clean it up. AND he was a cheater – not sure how he even got anyone else though as he was horrendously disgusting lol.
Image source: Mountain-Emphasis236
#38
Garlic lingers on my husband’s breath for days also because his previous oral care routine was so poor for so long. I had to threaten to walk away before he would finally correct it.
Image source: wearywolf0903
#39
I dated a girl briefly about 10 years ago (both in our mid 30’s at the time). She was a former model and still looked great. The first night that we were intimate, I went down on her and holy hell I almost puked in her bed. I didn’t want to embarrass her so I kept going. When i couldn’t take it any longer, I went to the bathroom and tried to get that awful taste out of my mouth any way I could.
Fast forward about a week and she contacted me. I didn’t want to move forward with a relationship but felt I should talk to her. I explained to her what happened that night and she nonchalantly told me that she had an active yeast infection! I told her that it was pretty messed up that she chose to not tell me about it and allow me to go down on her. Needless to say, the lack of communication (and hygiene) was a dealbreaker for me.
Image source: External_Lychee_4026
#40
I once dated a guy who used very little toilet paper when he wiped. I saw a huge brown streak down his butt crack because he liked to wear his pants plumber style and he had huge skid marks in his underwear. When I told him he needed to use more TP he just made the comment that toilet paper was expensive and wasn’t going to use more.
Image source: anon
#41
I went on a handful of dates with this guy from another university. Eventually we hung out at his place with his housemates. This is a California beach town and the house was in a cute area.
But the place was disgusting. The floors had never been swept or mopped. The communal bathroom toilet had about 2 years worth of s**t stains accumulated. Everyone’s toothbrushes were just lying in the counter exposed to the a*s explosions in the air. And you had to bring your own toilet paper. Mirror was thick with toothpaste splatter. Dried mucous in the sink. Trash on the floor. Obligatory no soap, dirty towels. They had a girl roommate, too, so I was surprised.
His room was decent though. And when it came time to hang out at my place, he remarked how my housemates and I must be clean freaks. No MF, we just have basic hygiene. I had to end things with him over it.
Image source: cameltoebikini
#42
He sucked toothpaste out of the tube when there was too little to easily squeeze out and I caught him in the act. It wasn’t a deal breaker.
Image source: glass_funyun
#43
This girl spent the night at my house and didn’t pack her toothbrush. I have around a dozen individually wrapped GuruNanda toothbrushes and tongue scrapers (I use the pulling oil and they are included) that I offer to guests and I walked to the bathroom and came back with one of each for her and she looked at me and said “I don’t want that s**t”. I made an excuse to get her to leave and I walked her to her car and then turned and went back in the house no kiss no hug not even a handshake. She was making a pretty long drive and I texted and told her to lmk when she made it home and she replied that she never wanted to see me again and I haven’t talked to her since.
Image source: Just4MTthissiteblows
#44
I was YOUNG maybe mid 20s i dated this guy one time i saw skid marks in his underwear and he would pee in Every sink!! He washed his a*s from what i could tell it was just the one time 🫣 but i couldn’t get pass the sink thing! My husband now is a germaphobe so i know hes clean.
Image source: anon
#45
Asked me to pee on them, it’s happened twice.
Image source: -Chemical
#46
Peed the bed. We dated from ages 11-14 and he had accidents our entire relationship. He admitted that sometimes he didn’t clean it until the am meaning he laid in it all night. (I know there could be a dark reason behind this which is why the actual accidents didn’t bother me to much but him not cleaning it and laying in it for hours is what got me).
Image source: Different-Event-8226
#47
Turned out he was a chemophobe who never used soap nor toothpaste. Only ever plain water and toothpicks. I repeat, never used soap ever. Proudly showed me his teeth to prove toothpaste not needed. They were grey…
Image source: Sea-Fan-6702
Follow Us
