So Sookie is an alien. I’m glad that’s solved.
After all the stakings, shootings and bludgeonings of the previous episodes, 3.10 took a step back to let us take our collective breath before the final epic showdowns. It looks like we will finally get to see the Bill (Stephen Moyer) vs. Eric (Alexandar Skarsgard) fang measuring contest we’ve been waiting three years for. It was a surprise that Eric chose to protect Sookie’s (Anna Paquin) life over his own. I don’t believe for one second that chaining her to a pole in the basement is anything other than a sign of awkward affection. Especially after they finally got to like, totally smoosh.
If you’re on Team Bill, you had to get all vampire gooey for his confessions of Sookie love. It was the first time all season I actually believed what Bill was saying as far as his emotions were concerned. It was also perhaps the first time anyone on TV has ever apologized for liking the way his girlfriend’s blood tasted too much.
Meanwhile on Team Furry, Sam (Sam Trammell) flash-backed to his murdering, jewel thieving days. Please and come on. Are we really to believe that this is the same level-headed peacemaker we’ve been watching for the last three years? It all seemed quite forced. It would have been far more effective (but just as superfluous) if they had given him some kind of repressed violence in his nature as a shifter. Instead we got Lassie James.
And how about that V trip taken by Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) and Jesus (Kevin Alejandro) to bring out their inner shaman? It was interesting for about 30 seconds. Unfortunately, it went on for about five minutes. Dramamine anyone? Still, I like where this is going. Black arts. Dancing Mary. (Let’s see who we can offend this week, shall we?) I don’t know that we’ll see much of this storyline develop in the final two episodes. More likely, it will set up part of the cliffhanger for Season Four.
Tara (Rutina Wesley) and Jason (Ryan Kwanten). Talk about kicking a woman when she’s already on the fast train to some serious crazy making. It seems like Tara’s entire character arc this season is for the purpose of bringing her closer to being a few Eggs short of a dozen (sorry). Not sure there are any more therapy groups left for her to join. She’s going to snap quicker than Lindsey Lohan passing by a Walmart pharmacy. Mass carnage sure to follow.
And now we’ve also added a Wiccan and a Werepanther to the mix. I can’t imagine what the Census must look like in Bon Temps. Or which Alan Ball wants us to think is the worse threat. (Let me see, have I offended Wiccans yet? Nope.)
Perhaps the sweetest scenes of all were the ones between Hoyt (Jim Parrack) and Jessica (Deborah Ann Woll). Yes, love is back in the air. And so are rabid pit bulls. There’s nothing more endearing than drinking the blood of a slashed wrist to bring two lovebirds back together. But this is the storyline that scares me the most. It’s not going to end well for someone. One can only hope it will be Tommy (Marshall Allman), but I’m not so sure. I fear for Bear.
And how cool was it to see Jason pull out the whole “ixnay on the invitay” on Bill? Funny stuff.
It’s unfortunate that the episode began its wrap up with Russell’s (Denis O’Hare) sadistic meltdown. We’ve already seen how much he mourned Thalbot. We don’t need another reason to be scared of him. This was rather self-indulgent filler that took away from a fairly solid episode.
What will happen in next week’s penultimate episode? Only one thing’s for certain. Blah blah vampire emergency blah.
Best Worst Line: “I don’t like narrow-minded skinny girls with bad hair dye.”
Most Disturbing Moment: Watching Mother Mary get her groove on.
Grade: B-
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