There’s nothing inherently wrong with dating a person with a significant age difference. As long as you’re both consenting adults who are willing to make things work, you can turn your relationship into something for the long term.
But of course, such an arrangement has its complications, especially when dealing with someone who has a family. This was a harsh reality a woman faced when she randomly bumped into her older boyfriend’s grown son.
Scroll down for the entire story, as well as our brief conversations with a few experts who shared their insights about romantic relationships with wide age gaps.
A woman ran into some significant issues involving her older partner
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It all happened after she bumped into her boyfriend’s grown son one night
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The random encounter caused her to have second thoughts about the relationship
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A woman’s challenges when dating someone with a significant age gap may be harsher
Whether you’re a man or a woman, being in a romantic relationship with a significant age gap can be challenging. But according to the experts we spoke with, women may have a harsher experience.
According to licensed psychologist Dr. Sabrina Romanoff, a woman’s struggle within the relationship happens especially with an older partner, who will likely call the shots. This will lead to them suppressing their needs.
“There often is less of a partnership and more of a boss-employee dynamic,” Dr. Romanoff told Bored Panda.
From the outside, a woman may face judgment from society. As Dr. Romanoff noted, they may be branded and ridiculed for “being a gold-digger.” And when their intentions are constantly questioned, many women tend to struggle to gain social acceptance and find a safe space within the relationship.
Meanwhile, when a man dates an older woman, the struggle is often from within. According to licensed psychotherapist Joanna Kaminski, LMFT, a significant challenge would be their ego, which leads them to chase younger women to feel youthful again.
According to relationship specialist Byrd Aruna, men, in such cases, may even receive validation for having a younger partner. At the same time, the judgment that a woman may face could add unnecessary pressure to prove the relationship’s legitimacy.
People with significantly older or younger partners must know when to stay or let go
Having a partner who is much older or younger than you is already complicated enough. For some people, it puts the relationship on shaky ground from the start. Therefore, it is essential to know whether it is still worth staying in the relationship or leaving it.
Dr. Romanoff says the lack of willingness to compromise is a major dealbreaker and a telltale sign that a breakup is a better option.
“Look at their level of emotional investment in you. Are they more interested in having you by their side and focused on what you can provide them, or are they actively taking steps to be the partner you need?” she said, advising asking yourself such questions.
Both Aruna and Kaminski agree that the cessation of growth and the enjoyment of each other’s company are essential warning signs to take note of. It may occur when intimacy fades or one partner becomes overly dependent.
In the woman’s case, the father’s lack of emotional investment in his own son was a major red flag in itself. She may need to heed the son’s warning and rethink the relationship for her own sake.
The woman provided more information in the comments section
Readers shared their reactions, as some offered pieces of advice
The woman shared an update to her story
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She ended up confronting her significant other, which didn’t go well
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After learning a bitter truth, she decided to bail
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While it was a painful experience, the woman remained grateful
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She provided more information by responding to follow-up comments
Likewise, people didn’t hold back with their reactions to the new developments
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