Welcome back, True Blood.
It took seven episodes, but “Hitting the Ground” finally accomplished something no other episode this season had done to date: it entertained from start to finish.
A moment of silence is needed for some of our favorite vampires we loved to hate. I’m going to miss Lorena (Mariana Klaveno) terribly. The very cruelty of her existence gave Bill (Stephen Moyer) a depth and angst that is going to be hard to replace. I’m still not sure what they are trying to do with him this season. He’s more schizophrenic than Mel Gibson. He nearly kills Sookie by feasting on her faster than David Spade at the Playboy Mansion and his only excuse is basically: “What do you want from me? I’m a vampire. I was starving. Duh.” Remember the days when he used to take his blood from a bottle? How cute that was? How charming? I can’t remember an episode this season where he didn’t have blood all over his mouth. He’s starting to look like a rabid teddy bear.
The Magister (Zeljko Ivanek) too, will be missed. Before he lost his head, he always added a touch of classy dread to the proceedings. (How great was the threat of silver eyelid piercings?!). Once again, Russell (Denis O’Hare) asks others to Respect His Authori-tay! and makes a convincing argument for the elimination of humans. Never mind the natural selection argument, when you look at the pile of crap facing the world today, it’s hard to argue against him. We DO blindly follow others. We ARE destroying the planet. If there was a superior race of creatures that could prevent that from happening, why shouldn’t they? Plus, they seem to have a lot more fun than we do. Put me on Team Russell.
Of course, one of the biggest reveals of 3.07 was Sookie’s (Anna Paquin) “trip” to Fairy-land. There’s no getting around it: these were some cheesy, dopey scenes. (Do you think that when you go through the fairy pool of Light you come out the other side into Lost’s Light cave?) But they were a great reveal. Having not read the books, I’m guessing there must be some kind of ongoing eternal battle over the power of Light between fairies and the “darkness” of vampires that will put Sookie right in the middle. And of course, her fairy blood seems to have the power not only to heal, but act as some seriously heavy duty sunblock. I can’t wait for the episode when Sookie and Bill go to the beach and Bill singlehandedly fights off a horde of killer sharks with his teeth.
Meanwhile, Sam (Sam Trammell) tries to free Tommy (Marshall Allman) from Joe Lee Vick by acting all Dog Whisperer. (Still don’t know what the point of this storyline is but the show seems to grind to a halt whenever his family is on). Jason (Ryan Kwanten) pines shirtless for his true love that he spent literally three minutes with (but hey, sometimes you just KNOW) and hits Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) up for some meth. Eric (Alexander Skarsgard) samples the Queen’s human to discover Sookie’s secret. And Cooter, we hardly knew ya’.
The pacing of 3.07 came fast and furious, it’s humor quick and funny. It’s a lot harder to question the show’s ridiculous motivational arcs or logic-defying plots when you’re far too busy laughing and being entertained.
Most Painful Moment: Sookie screaming “Help!” over Bill’s body in the vampire basement. It’s not like she might like, wake the dead or anything…not to mention all the werewolves with their, you know, super-hearing.
Best Worst Line: A tie between “I really want you to taste my biscuits” and “I’m so happy I could bleed.”
Grade: A-
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best line… " I never thought I was smart enough to be depressed"