“Opposites attract” is a common mantra often used in the dating sphere, but some people choose to defy that notion altogether.
It has been a decades-long debate about why some couples tend to look alike, at least at first glance, to the point that they are sometimes mistaken for siblings.
From similar facial features and smiles to matching eyes, these pairs have often left netizens doing double takes online.
An Instagram account called “Siblings or Dating” has seized this trend to garner over a million followers.
The page shares photographs of people who look similar, submitted by the users themselves, and asks followers to guess whether they are siblings or dating.
The answer is revealed in the second or third slide of the post.
#1
A large number of the pictures turn out to be dating, taking the commenters who get it wrong absolutely by surprise.
“Omg no way. They have the same exact face?” one user commented after they wrongly guessed that a couple was actually siblings.
Image source: siblingsordating
#2
Another said, “I’m gonna be so honest, I really thought they were those identical twins.”
“Check your family tree,” joked a third. A fourth said, “Literally the same person with different genders.”
Image source: siblingsordating
#3
Many argue that people are subconsciously drawn to partners with similar features. Others say human beings might actively seek out those who mirror them for the sake of familiar comfort.
However, research on the role of perceived and actual similarity in romantic relationships has shown that the phenomenon is much more complicated than it appears.
Image source: siblingsordating
#4
Bored Panda spoke with multiple researchers, who helped explain whether some individuals truly gravitate toward partners who look like them and why.
Psychologist Dr. Karen Stewart told us that people are indeed often subtly drawn to those who share their facial characteristics.
Image source: siblingsordating
#5
However, it is not a conscious act of actively seeking out a lookalike, but rather an underlying sense of “connectedness and familiarity” with someone who looks like a parent, sibling, or a related person.
“It is less about the physical resemblance and more about the brain’s tendency to associate familiarity with trust, connection, and even safety,” she said.
Image source: siblingsordating
#6
“Subconsciously, we are constantly scanning for cues that feel safe, trustworthy, and predictable, as our minds are always trying to keep us out of dangerous ways.”
“An example of this would be meeting a partner you are very interested in, and close friends and family members will say either you look alike or ‘he’s cute, he looks just like your dad!’” Dr. Stewart offered.
Image source: siblingsordating
#7
Psychologist Dr. Kayla Yellen echoed the opinion, adding that one explanation for the behavior is the “mere exposure effect,” which holds that our brains prefer “familiar-looking features.”
Moreover, both experts dismissed the often-used phrase “opposites attract” in romantic relationships.
Dr. Yellen called it a “myth” that is not supported by psychological research: “Rather, we are more attracted to people who share characteristics, values, and traits with us.”
Image source: siblingsordating
#8
Over the years, netizens have pointed out this occurrence in several celebrity couples as well.
Many found that Ariana Grande’s ex-boyfriend, Ethan Slater, whom she dated from 2023 to 2026, looked extremely similar to her brother, Frankie Grande, and that was not even the most controversial thing about their relationship.
Finneas O’Connell’s fiancée, actress Claudia Sulewski, is frequently compared to his sister, Billie Eilish, while Florence Pugh’s ex-partner, Zach Braff, eerily resembles her dad, Clinton Pugh.
Image source: siblingsordating
#9
A review led by Dr. Annika From of the University of Michigan, published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships in June 2025, sought to integrate disparate research on the role of similarity in romantic relationships.
The research team found that couples who reported being more similar physically also reported being more satisfied in their relationships, Dr. From told Bored Panda.
Image source: siblingsordating
#10
“Beyond my article, we definitely see that people tend to be attracted to and end up dating those with a similar racial/ethnic identity, age, and attractiveness level, which can contribute towards liking those who look similar to you, but there isn’t as much consistent evidence of that, per se.”
She added that other than familiarity, “mating market operations” may also fuel such choices.
Image source: siblingsordating
#11
“For example, if everyone wants to date the most attractive person they can possibly find, people will end up settling into similarly attractive couples… We also like things that feel familiar, and since our own face is the one we often have seen the most, it makes sense that we might also be attracted to similar features in others.”
Image source: siblingsordating
#12
However, that does not necessarily mean that people showing such tendencies are “narcissistic,” as the media and the general public have often labeled them so, the experts told Bored Panda.
“It is a misconception that people who date partners with similar features are self-absorbed or narcissistic,” Dr. Yellen said. “People who are attracted to partners who resemble themselves are also not usually consciously aware of this preference.”
Image source: siblingsordating
#13
“People do not necessarily fall in love with themselves. They fall in love with what is psychologically familiar and feels good,” Dr. Steward commented.
Sometimes, a perceived physical similarity may even be an assumption simply because two individuals were together.
Image source: siblingsordating
#14
“Once we see two people as a unit, we may focus on their similarities rather than their differences, including in physical attributes,” Dr. From said.
“Repeated exposure may make us feel like a couple ‘goes together’ and thus lead us to overperceive similarities in things like physical appearance. This is especially true if the photos emphasize similarity through clothing, poses, etc.”
Image source: siblingsordating
#15
In many cases where two partners look similar, the resemblance does not stop at facial features but extends to hobbies, interests, careers, lifestyle choices, and even medical issues.
Image source: siblingsordating
#16
A 2023 study published in Nature Human Behavior analyzed over 130 traits across nearly 80,000 couples using data from the UK Biobank and found that 82%-89% of the traits examined were highly correlated.
Image source: siblingsordating
#17
A 2026 article by ABC data journalist Inga Ting featured stories from several such couples, including one Australian couple, Gabe and Kelly.
Image source: siblingsordating
#18
They both have the same height, build, complexion, hair color, and are primary school teachers at the same institution, where students often struggle to tell them apart.
“We have occasionally swapped ID cards to pick up each other’s post or other errands,” Gabe shared.
Image source: siblingsordating
#19
“It’s the most common mating pattern globally,” Queensland University of Technology’s (QUT) behavioral economist Stephen Whyte told the outlet.
“You see it in every single culture, in every single country. It’s universal.”
Image source: siblingsordating
#20
On the other side of this discourse is the belief that partners who may not share many features initially grow to look alike over the years.
Many couples themselves have admitted experiencing this, or witnessing it in elderly couples who have been married for decades.
Image source: siblingsordating
#21
“My bf and I, some of our pics really look alike,” one person commented on Reddit.
Another said, “It’s just ironic that we looked alike when we were still together, but after we broke up, we don’t anymore.”
Image source: siblingsordating
#22
“Couples often develop similar facial expressions, emotional habits, and even lifestyle patterns over the decades. Therefore, they can start looking and acting like each other,” Dr. Stewart told us.
Image source: siblingsordating
#23
Dr. Yellen said that while couples don’t necessarily “morph” into one another, they develop similar facial expressions, manner of speaking, nonverbal gestures, and bodily mannerisms that “make them appear more alike” even if they differ in terms of facial structures.
Image source: siblingsordating
#24
We also asked whether choosing partners based on facial or physical similarities has been found to have a profound impact on the long-term success or compatibility of couples.
Image source: siblingsordating
#25
They both pointed out that psychological similarities, including shared values, life goals, communication styles, and emotional synchrony, along with years of shared experiences, are what build a lasting relationship, rather than a superficial resemblance.
Image source: siblingsordating
“It might be a biological thing.” Netizens speculated why some people choose to date their lookalikes
Follow Us
