You know the drill.
#1
me thinking what would happen if baby Yoda worked at Starbucks
/Users/user/Desktop/Baby-Yoda-Starbucks-SVG-324×324.jpg
bonus:
spider on the ceiling coming down
spider: hewwo
me: inhales deeply*
… ay yo whats good papi eight legs
#2
Eyes have tiny black holes that suck up all the light that enters them
#3
If you have a dog with 3 legs, your giving them confidence and encouragement because they see you with only two legs.
#4
could you take a syringe, and pull the liquid out a grape, and consider it a raisin?
#5
Do LGBTQ+ supporters think that the person that discovered the rainbow was gay? Sorry if you guys hate it. I’m not trying to be mean of offend you all.
#6
When you want to be in water,it’s nice. When you don’t it sucks
#7
Do dogs think they walk us?
Bonus: CRAP THERE’S A SPIDER ON THE CEILING
CRAP IT’S FALLING ON MY FACE
#8
If tomato is a fruit, ketchup is just a fruit smoothie! If you live to be 70 you will spend about 10 years on Monday! Deaf people don’t understand why farts are funny!
#9
Why is charlie short for charles when they’re the same length?
#10
how did the internet be invented without the internet and how in the world did we make it able to be stored in millions of routers
#11
You can be big brained and square brained at the same time
Technically we are all ghosts with bodies
Our bones are wet, but don’t worry, someday they won’t be
Since matter can’t be destroyed, everything that’s ever died is still here. Beethoven still exists.
#12
What if I write Biden Harris 2020 on the shower wall in shaving cream?
#13
*While I am cleaning hair* “Shut up, the shampoo does not look like mucus… the shampoo does NOT look like mucus…”
#14
How much I really want a Reuben sandwich and how much I like strawberry soda.
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