Best of luck finding a parking spot when you’re chasing down rebel scum, and definitely good luck getting anyone to let you over during rush hour on the freeway. Then again, maybe if people saw this coming they might think twice about trying to get in your way. It’s not every day you see a modified Volvo, at least not like this, but one has to figure that the owner is a pretty big Star Wars fan to go to this length since the cost of creating a rolling version of a star destroyer, one of the most destructive craft that’s been seen in the history of movies, is bound to cost a few bucks unless of course one doesn’t plan on driving it down the road. Seriously, this is pretty impressive, but seeing it going down the road must mean that the materials used to make the outer shell would have to be something sturdier than foam or even styrofoam since unless there’s something that’s fairly strong holding it all together, this thing would no doubt fly apart when the car was brought up to speed. This is the type of car that would force a person to park in the very back of the parking lot, and even then only if we’re talking about a Walmart or Costco parking lot since the space needed for this thing is beyond anything that a small lot could provide.
Star destroyers are simply intimidating in their appearance and that’s how they’re meant to be since the Empire had every intention of striking fear into the hearts of everyone they came upon, no matter that they spoke of creating order and stability so often. That order and stability was usually reserved for humans and whatever alien species resembled humans closely enough or were willing to sell their own people down the river so to speak. There was a great deal of xenophobia in Star Wars under the reign of the Empire, but it was never quite absolute since even Emperor Palpatine knew better than to fully alienate every living species. But when it came to keeping everyone in line, the sight of a star destroyer in the sky was bound to make it clear that there would be no disobedience without consequences, as the dagger-shaped ships meant that the Empire was there in a substantial way and could proceed with the type of bombardment that could eliminate cities from a distance or could unleash swarms of TIE fighters that would decimate an even wider area. There were a few different sizes when it came to these ships since the biggest was revealed in The Last Jedi, the same movie in which it was destroyed by a jump to lightspeed that tore it apart. But there have also been different functions for the various star destroyers as well, as the Empire created specialized craft that were used for different purposes.
They were also some of the toughest spacecraft in Star Wars since only the most daring would ever go up against them and even then they had to come with a seriously intelligent plan, which is what was really frustrating in The Last Jedi since the Resistance flew their bomber straight towards the First Order’s star destroyers as though they could maneuver the ungainly ships and still get enough to the target to make a difference. Obviously they ended up succeeding, but it was something that made a lot of fans wonder aloud at the sense of it. Star destroyers aren’t the most nimble vehicles ever created, but they’re typically armed to the teeth and shielded in such a way that it would take a serious amount of damage to take them down. Plus, thanks to the Empire and the First Order being able to exploit whatever worlds they need to in order to get the materials and afford the heavy costs that come with each vehicle, they have a crew that would equal the population of a moderately-sized city, and many of those are bound to be stormtroopers and TIE pilots. They don’t really have to be nimble since between the personnel that can fight, operate the weapons, fly a TIE, and otherwise work on the bridge to tell when enemy fighters are incoming, these things should have been one of the biggest terrors in the Star Wars franchise. And for a while, they were.
But on the road the only reason this thing would be funny watch since just imagining the front tip wobbling up and down as it went down the road is hilarious. There’s no doubt that someone would buy this thing since it’s a novelty that a lot of people would probably want to keep in their garage or at least out back as a conversation piece. But driving it down the road in anything but a parade might not be looked on too kindly by the cops.
Follow Us
