Every couple has their own ideas about what they want their wedding to look like, from the dress code to who gets invited. Still, there’s one rule that feels about as universal as wedding etiquette gets: unless you’ve been specifically told otherwise, you do not wear white to someone else’s big day.
That didn’t stop this Redditor’s mother-in-law from picking an outfit that looked a little too bridal. The newlyweds decided not to let it ruin anything and simply had her dress Photoshopped into a different color afterward.
MIL was far from amused. She accused the bride of humiliating her and somehow managed to make herself the victim. Scroll down for the full story and to see the dress that started all the drama.
The bride’s mother-in-law decided to wear white to the wedding
Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
But after the couple dealt with it in a pretty clever way, she somehow made herself the victim
Edward Jenner / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Kampus Production / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Kateryna Hliznitsova / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Wearing white to a wedding is a well-known fashion faux pas
There was once a time when brides wore all sorts of colors to their weddings. White only became the big bridal favorite after Queen Victoria chose it for her own wedding in 1840. The look caught on, and over the years, white became closely associated with brides in many cultures.
These days, it’s one of those wedding traditions pretty much everyone knows about. So the mother-in-law’s choice in this story is pretty hard to brush off as an innocent mistake.
She’d already been told that the bride didn’t want her wearing anything that could photograph too close to white. Judging by how much secrecy surrounded her final dress, it’s easy to see why readers were convinced she knew exactly what she was doing.
Wedding experts agree that wearing white as a guest is a major faux pas. “When you’re a guest at a wedding, the most important thing to keep in mind is not to upstage or upset the bride,” wedding dress designer Madeline Gardner told The Knot. “It’s safe to stay away from any outfits that are predominantly white, cream or ivory.”
Of course, that doesn’t mean every tiny bit of white is suddenly forbidden. According to Public Desire, as long as it makes up less than 25% of the outfit, you’re generally in the clear.
A navy dress with a few white stripes, for example, should be fine. A mostly white dress with a colorful belt is a different story. As a general rule, if you’re worried your outfit looks too white, it probably does.
Mothers-in-law can sometimes act out during weddings because the occasion can make them feel less relevant in their child’s life
With the amount of fashion choices out there, avoiding one color for one celebration shouldn’t be too difficult. Yet mothers-in-law have somehow earned quite the reputation for causing drama around weddings. It’s a shame, considering the occasion is supposed to be such a happy one.
There may be a reason these celebrations bring out such strong reactions. According to Brides, they can be a big adjustment for parents as they watch their child enter a new chapter and start creating new traditions and priorities.
“Weddings can bring up a host of emotional issues for families,” Dr. Akua K. Boateng, licensed psychotherapist, told Brides. “Unmet dreams and failed expectations can be the source of conflict. It is a parent’s attempt to navigate their relevance within the child’s life as they reckon with the potential loss of connection and dependence.”
Of course, those feelings don’t give anyone a free pass to act out at someone else’s wedding. The couple in this story certainly weren’t going to just leave things as they were. Instead, they handled the problem on their own terms by editing the MIL’s dress to look pink in the photos and later explaining why they’d done it. She didn’t exactly take it well.
Readers felt their response was pretty fair given the circumstances. What do you think? Was changing the dress color a clever solution, or would you have handled things differently? Share your thoughts in the comments below.
Readers agreed the MIL knew exactly what she was doing and thought the couple’s response was completely fair
The husband also posted a photo of the dress his mom wore
After seeing it, readers were even more convinced the whole thing was intentional
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