All of us—well, most of us—love to travel. Seeing new places, meeting new people, and feeling a whirlwind of emotions whenever you find yourself somewhere you have never been before or return to a place you hold dear in your heart.
Each country—and even every city—has its own vibe and some characteristics that make it unique. Often, the same traits are also grounds for jokes. Making funny jokes about countries and their various features is absolutely fine as long as you aren’t rude to anyone.
Always remember that it is somebody’s homeland, and what seems really funny to you might be insulting to them. That being said, it doesn’t mean you should never tell jokes in company. Funny jokes or puns about countries are a great way to break the ice, spend time, and even get to know each other better.
Hilarious Puns About Countries That Travel Beyond Boundaries
Country puns can range from great subtle humor to country dad jokes and everything in between. You may even throw in some adult puns every now and then—just make sure it is appropriate for the audience. You don’t have to be a geography expert to make or even understand funny country jokes, but knowing something about the world and having some traveling experience definitely enhances the quality of the jokes.
So whether you are a seasoned traveler, are just planning your first trip, or are a dedicated geography enthusiast, enjoy this collection of funny country jokes we gathered for you.
#1
A British man is visiting Australia. The customs agent asks him, “Do you have a criminal record?” The British man replies, “I didn’t think you needed one to get into Australia anymore.”
#2
Why do the French eat snails?
They don’t like fast food.
#3
A slice of apple pie is $2.50 in Jamaica and $3.00 in the Bahamas.
These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
#4
Germany and France go to war. Who loses?
Belgium.
#5
One day Canada will rule the world…
Then you’ll all be sorry.
#6
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
#7
England doesn’t have a kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
#8
Amsterdam is a lot like the Tour de France. Just a lot of people on drugs riding bikes.
#9
I asked my friend in North Korea how he was. He said he can’t complain.
#10
How do you get a Canadian to apologize?
Step on their foot.
#11
What do you call a vegan Viking?
A Norvegan!
#12
How does every Russian joke start?
By looking over your shoulder.
#13
Which country’s capital is growing the fastest?
Ireland. Every day it’s Dublin.
#14
Want to hear a Swedish joke?
Nevermind. There’s Norway I could Finnish it.
#15
What does the Loch Ness monster eat?
Fish and ships.
#16
I have a Russian friend who’s a sound technician.
And a Czech one too. A Czech one too.
#17
What do you call a bee that lives in America?
A USB.
#18
What happened to the American who went to the hospital with a broken leg?
He went broke.
#19
Why haven’t Americans changed their weighing method from pounds to kilograms?
Because they don’t want mass confusion!
#20
An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman enter a bar. The Englishmen wanted to go, so they all had to leave.
#21
What do frogs eat in Paris?
French flies.
#22
Two very old men of European nationality meet
While talking, one asks: “You watching the football game?”
The other says: “Who’s playing?”
“Austria-Hungary”, says the first.
“Against whom?”
#23
Is “Africa” by Toto a country song?
No, it’s a continent song.
#24
Why do bagpipe players walk while they play?
To get away from the noise.
#25
Did you hear about the Italian chef that died?
He pasta way.
#26
What kind of birds can you find in Portugal?
Portugeese.
#27
What is the most common scam in Egypt?
Pyramid schemes.
#28
What was the most popular kids’ movie in Ancient Greece?
Troy Story.
#29
An introverted Finn looks at his shoes when talking to you; an extroverted Finn looks at your shoes.
#30
Why do all Swedish military ships have bar codes on them?
So when the come to port, they can just Scan da navy in!
#31
What happens when the smog lifts over Southern California?
U.C.L.A.
#32
What did the Kiwi say to the Rabbi?
Hee Broo.
#33
In which country is Prague located?
Hold on let me Czech.
#34
Germany once organized the International Fun Conference.
It wasn’t funny but it was indeed well organized.
#35
Why is it hard to make friends in Antarctica?
Because you can’t break the ice.
#36
A friend in Germany tells me everyone’s panic buying sausages and cheese.
It’s the Wurst Käse scenario.
#37
Ever since my girlfriend moved to Siberia things haven’t been the same.
She’s so cold and distant.
#38
How was copper wire invented?
Two Scotsmen fighting over a penny.
#39
What is the German word for constipation?
Farfrompoopin.
#40
What are Greek houses made out of?
Greeks and con-Crete!
#41
Did you hear about the Pole who thought his wife was trying to kill him? On her dressing table, he found a bottle of “Polish Remover.”
#42
What kind of car does an Icelandic person drive?
A Fjord.
#43
I’ve heard that Argentina is starting to get a little colder…
In fact, it’s bordering on Chile.
#44
Why did the Dalai Lama go to Las Vegas?
Because he loves Tibet.
#45
What pan is the best to make sushi in?
Japan.
#46
What do you call a rude Jamaican?
Caribbean Jerk.
#47
What will an Australian chess player say to a Czech person while making the winning move?
Czech mate.
#48
What do you call your angry French aunt?
A crossaunt.
#49
I watched a Hindu version of “How I Met Your Mother.” There’s just one episode about the wedding.
#50
Did you hear McDonalds will stop serving fries in Switzerland?
The Swiss don’t take sides.
#51
The Sahara Desert drifts into a bar and the bartender says…
“Long time no sea.”
#52
What did the Icelandic dog say?
Bjork Bjork.
#53
What is a favorite fantasy film of an Aussie?
The Wizard of Oz.
#54
What do you call a bunch of bullies from Malta?
Maltesers.
#55
What do you call counterfeited German currency?
Question marks.
#56
Someone beat me up with a map of Belgium. Now I’m covered in Bruges.
#57
What genre are national anthems?
Country.
#58
What did the Ancient Greeks wear on their feet?
Tennis Zeus.
#59
Where do Australian animals go for vacation?
Koala Lumpur.
#60
What do they call their kids in Belgium?
Brussels Sprouts.
#61
What’s Santa’s nationality?
North Polish.
#62
While experimenting with Asian and Latin American food, Iran out of Chile.
#63
What are atheists called in India?
Naan believers.
#64
My friend lived in a place that had six months of sunlight and six months of complete darkness. Man, there is Norway I can live there.
#65
Where do crayons go on vacation?
Color-ado!
#66
What is the cookie capital of Brazil?
Oreo di Janiero.
#67
What would you call an unidentified object which landed in Australia?
Australien.
#68
What is the name of the country where everyone counts things on their own?
It is the country of Italy.
#69
What is the name of a bird’s favorite country?
It’s Turkey.
#70
What is the name of that nation where you get fancy water?
It’s Fiji.
#71
What blood type do people from Taiwan have?
Taipei.
#72
Why did the southerner visit Korea?
Because he wanted to eat Seoul food.
#73
Do you know why the new football stadium they built in Warsaw could not be used?
No matter where you sat, you were behind a Pole.
#74
What literally looks like half of North Korea?
South Korea!
#75
Most countries is Asia are fake.
Only one Israel.
#76
If frogs are from Greenland then, sharks are from Finland.
#77
Want my opinion on Mongolia?
It has its pros and Khans.
#78
Why were the people at the bar confused by the Spanish southerner?
Because he kept talking in Espan-y’all.
#79
Someone told me that French fries are from Belgium…
But they’re cooked in Greece!
#80
What happens to the soldiers who are supposed to be deployed to Iraq?
They sit and Kuwait.
#81
Why wouldn’t the Statue of Liberty work in France?
Because she only has one arm raised.
#82
What’s the only drink size they allow in North Korea?
A supreme liter.
#83
I met this person on the internet. When I asked him where he was from, he said from Latin America. I replied, “I won’t Bolivia until you show some proof!”
#84
Iran.
Why?
Because I am Hungary.
#85
What did Tennessee see that left it speechless?
The same thing Arkansas.
#86
What do you call two Samoans on a roof?
Solé power.
#87
My parents were on a boat cruise in the Mediterranean Sea. When I arrived there unannounced, I Cyprus-ed them.
#88
There was an Indie rock band that would only play in venues in the West Indies.
#89
What did one kiwi statue say to the other kiwi statue?
Stat’chu bro?
#90
What’s a german’s favorite number?
Nein!
#91
What part of Iceland are you from?
Hallormsstadaskogur? Oh cool.
#92
During my vacation in Western Africa, I had an insatiable urge one morning Togo buy a meatball sandwich.
#93
After facing a problem in geography, Iraq-ed my brain for a solution but in the end, I couldn’t find one.
#94
In which place do people designate all the dens with a special sign?
They do that In Denmark!
#95
How was the airport security in Los Angeles?
Quite LAX.
#96
What type of photography do French photographers like?
Candide.
#97
What would you call Dwayne Johnson if he was from Malta?
Lava, because he would be the Maltan Rock.
#98
What do you call a Spanish matador who visits the continent of Latin America?
Ecuador!
#99
As I was cruising around in the Caribbean, I asked my chef, “Did Jamaica me my special lunch?”
#100
Which African state did Wall-E visit?
He visited Mali.
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