Lookit, what’s that thing gracefully floating in a pond, merrily honking around and shooting projectiles out of their bums? Why, glad you asked, for it’s the hero of the bird world, the duck! And although we do find the subject of butt projectiles devilishly amusing, the duck itself is the protagonist of this article. And it’s not just some article; it’s an article composed of duck puns!
Some bird puns glorify their subjects—their luscious plumage, their lilting songs, and the gracefulness they show, making inconceivable figures like gods above our heads. With duck jokes, though, the story is a bit different—these silly puns are mostly about ducks being, well, ducks. Sometimes angry, sometimes funny, but most importantly—always painfully adorable. So, before scrolling down, be prepared for some very, muchas, and tres cute puns. Don’t say that we didn’t warn you!
Now, we’re not ones to ruffle some feathers, but these duck jokes will definitely take you on a flight of a lifetime (that being a hyperbole, of course—these are just some funny puns, after all). Ready? Well then, scroll on down below and check out our glorious selection of duck puns! Once you are there, vote for the funny duck jokes you liked the most and share this article with anyone to whom it might be of concern.
#1 Quack me up, that’s true
Why do ducks hate reading directions?
They prefer to wing it.
#2 Quack me up, that’s smooth
How do ducks propose?
With a wedding wing.
#3 Quacking Up Over Here
Daddy duck was watching a film called ‘Lord Of The Wings’.
#4 Passport? More like quack-port.
The ducks couldn’t fly to another country, because they didn’t have the proper duck-uments.
#5 French Ducks: Quack with Flair
What do they say about French ducks?
They have a certain je ne sais quack about them.
#6 Quacktice Makes Perfect
The Buddhist duck visited the mo-nest-ry every day.
#7 Floor 20 and still not high enough
The duck who lived on the 20th floor of the building wanted a pair of binoculars to get a bird’s eye view.
#8 Quackflix and Chill
What show do ducks watch on TV?
Duckumentaries.
#9 Quack me up, please!
Most ducks live in what state?
Duckota.
#10 Quack me up, spooky style
What do you call a ghost duck?
A poultrygeist!
#11 Punchline before sunrise
At what time does a duck wake up?
At the quack of dawn.
#12 Quack says no thanks
What do ducks say when people throw things at them?
“Time to duck!”
#13 Plot twist: it’s totally a thing
What is a chick’s favorite drink?
Peepsi.
#14 Pun absolutely nailed it
What do you call a bird that can fix anything?
Duck tape.
#15 Quack me up, Santa style
What do you get if you cross a duck and Santa Claus?
A Christmas quacker.
#16 Plot twist: You’re the main course
When is roast duck bad for your health?
When you’re the duck.
#17 Unexpected duck drama
If a duck says “Quack quack,” what says “Quick quick?”
A duck with hiccups.
#18 Quacktastic Binge-Watching
What kind of TV shows do ducks watch?
Duckumenteries.
#19 Snack attack unlocked
What type of food do you get when you cross a duck with a mole?
Quackamole.
#20 Quack Up Your Finances
Why did the duck go to the bank?
He wanted to get a new bill.
#21 Quack Me Up
What language can a duck who converses with geese speak fluently?
Portu-geese.
#22 Quack’in up online skills
Ducks love surfing the internet; they use their webbed feet.
#23 Quackflix and Chill Vibes
A duck went out to watch a movie, starring her favorite actress Duck-ota Johnson.
#24 Nature’s weirdest mashup
If a duck was crossed with a crocodile, it would make a quack-odile.
#25 Professional Overquacker Alert
A duck who is never tired of quacking and always wants to quack is called Quack-more Duck.
#26 Quack Church Vibes Only
There is a special church for ducks.
Birds of Pray.
#27 Quacking the Code
What was the secret agent duck named?
James Pond!
#28 Quack Me Up, Seriously
What do you call a rude duck?
A duck with a quackitude.
#29 This Duck’s Life Hack Is Weirdly Relatable
Why did the duck sleep under the car?
Because he wanted to wake up oily.
#30 This Cat Just Went Full Quack
What do you call a cat that swallows a duck?
A duck-filled-fatty-puss.
#31 Quack me up every time
What did the duck say when the waitress came?
“Put it on my bill!”
#32 Gravity’s just a suggestion
What happens when a duck flies upside down?
It quacks up.
#33 Quack Up Your Doctor Visit
Where did the duck go when he was sick?
To the ducktor.
#34 Quack me up, that’s good
What do you call a duck that steals?
A robber ducky.
#35 Sibling rivalry but make it quacky
Two ducks were swimming in a pond. One of them said “Quack quack.”
Then the other said, “Hey, I was about to say that!”
#36 Logic Nobody Talks About
Why do ducks lay eggs?
They would break if they dropped them.
#37 Can’t Trust a Duck Behind the Wheel
Why are ducks bad drivers?
Their windshields are quacked.
#38 Quackery with Bite
What do you call a duck with fangs?
Count Duckula.
#39 Quacking Up Over This Pun
What’s a duck’s favorite ballet?
The Nutquacker.
#40 Quack goals, not bank goals
What did the duck say to the banker?
“My bill is bigger than yours.”
#41 Peak duck logic right there
Why did the duck cross the road?
Because there was a quack in the sidewalk.
#42 When Your Bird Pun Takes Flight
Chicken! Duck! Pheasant plucker!
Oh, sorry — excuse my fowl language.
#43 Quacktastic financial advice
Why didn’t the duck have any money?
Because he already had a big bill.
#44 Quacktastic Wordplay Alert
Where can you find pictures of duck feet?
They’re on the webbed.
#45 Quack Me Up
What’s a duckling’s favorite game?
Beakaboo!
#46 I see what you did there
Why did the duck go to the chiropractor?
To get it’s back quacked.
#47 Quack-tastic breakfast fail
What happens if a duck with hiccups lays eggs?
It lays scrambled eggs.
#48 Quack Me Up
What’s a duck always order with its Chinese food?
An eggroll.
#49 I’d watch my step around those quackodiles
What’s a duck’s favorite animal at the zoo?
Quackodiles.
#50 Quack-ups happen, right?
What’d the duck say when he dropped his plate?
“I hope I didn’t quack it!”
#51 Cows Know How to Compliment
What did the cow tell the duck when she heard she won the lottery?
“You lucky duck!”
#52 Quack Goes the Boom
What do you get if you mix ducks with fireworks?
Firequackers.
#53 Date Night Quacked Me Up
The lovely duck couple went to watch a movie, they watched ‘A-nest-hesia.’
#54 Quacking Cases Wide Open
Donald Duck became an undercover operator and became a duck-tective.
#55 Quack’s Got Talent
The poultry farm owner made his duck a famous singer and the duck promises to keep on singing until his Bill Withers.
#56 Quack Up Your Savings Game
My ducks are really good at saving, because they have their bills under control.
#57 When your ducks get a little too acidic
The drakes were in need of medication as they had an aci-duck stomach.
#58 Quack Yeah, Movie Stars
Some drakes were really pro-duck-tive, so a film crew decided to make duck-umentry on them.
#59 Quack Culture, Always Trending
Ducks are always trending on social media, they have a large fan follo-wing.
#60 Quack Attack, Please
All the drakes, mallards and ducks asked the waiter to get them quack-a-mole topping added to their nachos.
#61 Quack me up, caffeine style
Ducks love coffee; they love bre-wing it.
#62 When the ducks drop the mic
It’s always the duck-est just before dawn.
#63 Quack Me Up
Ducks are good at the art of se-duck-tion.
#64 Quack if you love trains
The train con-duck-tor was cool.
#65 Quack me up with that one
What do you call slang between young ducks?
Ducklingo.
#66 I See What You Did There
What is the baby duck’s favorite game?
Beak-a-boo.
#67 Quacking Up the Courtroom
What did the lawyer say to the duck in court?
“I demand an egg-splanation!”
#68 Quack me up, they all blend in
How can you tell rubber ducks apart?
You can’t because they look egg-xactly the same!
#69 Dad jokes really do ducking deliver
What did the duck say when he dropped the dishes?
“I hope I didn’t quack any!”
#70 Plot twist: Duck Edition
Where do tough ducks come from?
Hard-boiled eggs.
#71 This pun’s udderly quacking me up
What do you call a cow and two ducks?
Milk and quackers.
#72 Quack Me Up
What do you call a clever duck?
A wise quacker.
#73 Quack me up, really?
Why do ducks check the news?
For the feather forecast.
#74 Quack, That’s Just Logic
On what side does a duck have the most feathers?
The outside.
#75 Best pun in the pond?
What did the ducks carry their schoolbooks in?
Their quack-packs.
#76 When waddling just won’t cut it
Why do ducks fly south for the winter?
It’s too far to waddle.
#77 Quack Moves Not Allowed
Why did the duck get a red card in the football game?
For fowl-play.
#78 Classic Joke Energy
Knock, knock.
Who’s there? Quack! Quack who? Quack open the door and you’ll see!
#79 Talking ducks? Quack me up!
How do ducks talk?
They don’t; they quack.
#80 When your squad rides together, they glide together
Why did the duck cross the road?
He was tied to the chicken.
#81 Quack Ups Happen
Two ducks were skipping down a sidewalk when, suddenly, one tripped and fell. It got up and said to the other duck, “I’m sorry — I tripped on a quack!”
#82 Quack-Level: Forever Young
Why do ducks never grow up?
Because they grow down.
#83 Snack goals: quack and munch
What do mallards eat at a baseball game?
Quacker-jacks.
#84 Quack Off, Please
What do pre-teen ducks hate?
Voice quacks.
#85 Corny jokes really do quack me up
What did the duck say to the corn it ate for lunch?
You taste a-maize-ing.
#86 Quack Me Up
What is storytime called when you read to ducklings?
Ducktales.
#87 That joke really *quacked* me up
What’s a duck do when he hears a joke he likes?
He quacks up!
#88 Quacking Up the Dress Code
What should a duck wear to a fancy event?
A duck-sedo!
#89 Quack Me Up
What do you call a crazy duck?
A wacky duck!
#90 Guilty Quackers Only
What kind of eggs do bad ducks lay?
Deviled eggs.
#91 Quacktastic Side Hustle
Why did the duck get a second job?
He had too many bills.
#92 Waking Up? Nature’s Got It Covered
The duck slept without keeping an alarm but don’t worry, she’ll get up at the quack of the dawn.
#93 Quack-itude? Relatable duck drama.
In a group of back-yard duck friends, one duck was left alone, because she was said to have quack-itude.
#94 Quack Doctor’s DIY Fix
A duck had her feathers broken, so her family doctor used duck-tape to fix her feathers.
#95 Quack Packs: Ducking Off the Backpack Struggle
Two little ducks didn’t like their backpacks, so they were told to carry their school books in their quack packs instead!
#96 Quack-ademic Emergency
The poultry owner took their ducks to the duck-tor as they were sick.
#97 Bread-taking but quack-worthy
We fed a group of ducks in the backyard the other day, and it was really bread-taking.
#98 Quack Confessions Uncovered
The duck-tective interrogated the victim ducks today, and they eventually quacked under pressure.
#99 Quackflix and Chill Vibes
The group of ducks watched a movie together, it was called ‘Beak A Leg.’
#100 Quack Tech Support, Anyone?
The duck mechanic offered to fix the computer as he is quite good at duck-nology and understands the web.
#101 Quack-tus injuries: ducks’ worst day
I pity the ducks who were pricked by the quack-tus and had to go to the duck-tor.
#102 When Your Ducks Don’t Speak Duck
The mallards consulted the duck-tionary as they couldn’t get quacks.
#103 Quack Meets Petal Energy
If a flower was crossed with a duck, we would get Daisy Duck.
#104 Quack’s Got a Side Hustle
What do you get if you cross a duck with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
#105 Plan? Nah, Let’s See What Happens
You could always wing it and see where the wind takes you.
#106 Not everything needs to be a whole mood
They don’t all have to quack you up, just put a little ruffle in your feathers.
#107 Quacktastic since day one
How did the duck parents know their duckling was a prodigy?
He was eggcelent from birth!
#108 Quack me up!
What kind of egg does a troublemaker duckling hatch from?
Deviled.
#109 Quack Me Up
Where do ducks go shopping?
The mall-ard.
#110 This Quack’s Nuts
Did you hear about the duck who thought he was a squirrel?
That was one tough nut to quack.
#111 Quack me up every time
Why did the duck cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
#112 Quack me up, no seriously
What do you call it when it’s raining ducks and chickens?
Fowl weather.
#113 Quack if you love sparks
What do you call a duck that loves fireworks?
A fire-quacker.
#114 Quack Moves Only
Why was the duck put into the basketball game?
To make a fowl shot!
#115 Quarks Just Got Quacktastic
What do duck physicists say?
“Quark, quark.”
#116 Quack Pack Goals
What do you get when you put four ducks in a box?
A box of quackers.
#117 Plot Twist: Wrong Animal, Buddy
How do you get down off a horse?
You don’t get down off a horse — you get down off a duck.
#118 Quack-cal Consultations Only
Where do ducks go when they are sick?
The ducktor’s office.
#119 Quacktastic Veggie Choice
What’s a duck’s favorite vegetable?
An eggplant!
#120 That pun waddled right into me
Why did the duckling almost fall on the sidewalk?
She tripped on a quack.
#121 Snack game: peak quacktastic
What’s a duck’s favorite type of popcorn?
Quacker Jacks.
#122 Quack me up, campfire style
Why do ducks like campfires?
They love seeing them quackle at night.
#123 Guess That Repair Shop Bill
Why did the duck have to go to the auto shop?
His windscreen was quacked!
#124 Quack if you dare
The interviewer asked everyone whether they had heard about the duck who thought she was a squirrel; they replied, “Argh! That was a tough one to quack.”
#125 Duck jokes? Always quacking me up
“The poultry farm owner said, “My ducks are very sincere; they are really ho-nest.””
#126 Quack-tically Outplayed
The duck was declared out by the umpire in a baseball match because she did a fowl play.
#127 Class Clown Went Full Quack
A duck was scolded by the teacher as she was continuously quacking jokes in the class.
#128 Quacking Up the Hide and Seek Game
Donald Duck was egg-cited for the hide and seek game as he’s a wise quacker in being sneaky.
#129 Quack That, Captain
If a duck pilot went to McDonald’s, he would introduce himself as Launchpad McQuack.
#130 Quack Counts Don’t Count
Ducks make lousy accountants, because they only know how to de-duck.
#131 Proof that waddling beats whining
How are 1 year old and duckling different?
The first one is the whiny toddler and the second one a tiny waddler.
#132 When Your Words Quack Back
The duckling got grounded for his language.
He had a fowl mouth.
#133 Quack me up, detective
What did Detective Duck say to his partner?
“Let’s quack this case!”
#134 This Duck’s Got No Chill
Why was the teacher annoyed with the duck?
Because he wouldn’t quit quackin’ jokes.
#135 Guess That’s Why They’re So Quacky
What do ducks have with soup?
Quackers.
#136 Plot twist: Ducks are just cows in denial
Why do ducks say quack?
Because it can’t say moo.
#137 Quack me up every time
What is a duck’s favorite sea monster?
The quacken.
#138 Quack me up, seriously
What did the flying golf ball yell to the mallards in the pond?
Duck!
#139 Plot twist survival skills
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. What happens if you teach a man to duck?
He avoids walking into a bar.
#140 This Duck’s Pun Game Is Unstoppable
Why did the duck get detention?
He couldn’t stop quackin’ jokes in class.
#141 Quack’s the Secret Ingredient
How do ducks make pancakes?
They use Bis-quack!
#142 Quack Me Up
The duck’s favorite dance movie is ‘La La Land’, he said, “It’s poultry in motion.”
#143 Quack Court Drama Unfolds
At a high profile civil suit, the duck lawyer in charge of defence said, “Ma-llard these ducks are not at fault.”
#144 Quack Rockers Unite
A group of ducks were going to a rock band concert, the band name was ‘Wing-er.’
#145 Quack That Logic
Why don’t ducks grow up?
Because they only grow down.
#146 Quack Moves Only
Platypus enters a restaurant that is owned by a duck. He finishes his meal and asks for his check. What did the duck do?
Duck-billed platypus.
#147 Quackery in the Pool
What is it called when a duck commits an illegal act in waterpolo?
A water-fowl!
#148 Quack Up Your Kindness Game
What do you call a kind and successful duck?
A waddle citizen.
#149 Quack meets wiener goals
What do you get when you cross a duck and a wiener dog?
A duckshund!
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