A couple’s wedding day should be all about them. Even though their family members and friends are involved, and may be an integral part of the celebration, they shouldn’t do anything that’s going to steal attention away from the happy couple. And if they do, karma might just come for them…
One Reddit user recently shared a story detailing how her friend’s mother-in-law showed up to her son’s wedding wearing a white gown. But instead of calling her out or making a scene, the friend decided to hire a couple of entertainers that they knew the mom wouldn’t be a fan of. Below, you’ll find the full story, as well as a conversation with the wedding expert behind Modern MOH, Megan.
An important aspect of wedding etiquette is wearing appropriate attire to the celebration
Image credits: negratomasin (not the actual photo)
So when one groom’s mother decided to wear white, a friend of the bride called in two drag queens to steal the show
Image credits: negratomasin (not the actual photo
Image credits: negratomasina
“Wearing white as a guest, even shades like cream or ivory, can feel tone-deaf or attention-seeking”
While wedding etiquette can vary widely from culture to culture, if you’re attending a wedding in your own country, you probably understand exactly what’s expected of you. Show up on time with a present in hand looking your best, don’t drink too much at the reception, don’t cause any drama or steal the show, and do everything you can to support the happy couple. Oh yeah, and don’t wear white.
To find out more about this topic, we got in touch with wedding expert and creator of Modern MOH, Megan. She was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda and discuss why white is typically off limits for wedding guests.
“Traditionally, white is the bride’s signature color—it’s meant to symbolize purity and new beginnings—and it should be hers alone on the big day,” Megan shared. “This tradition started with Queen Victoria, and wearing white as a guest can feel like stealing someone’s thunder.”
“On a practical level, white naturally draws your eye in photos and creates visual competition. When guests wear white, it gets confusing figuring out who the actual bride is from across the room,” the expert continued. “Etiquette experts agree: wearing white as a guest, even shades like cream or ivory, can feel tone-deaf or attention-seeking.”
“Unless the couple explicitly says ‘wear white,’ it’s safest to respect the tradition and let the bride have her spotlight moment,” Megan added.
Image credits: Min An (not the actual photo)
“Ask the couple about any color preferences or restrictions, and coordinate with the mother of the bride”
So what should the mother of the groom be wearing? “Mothers of the groom actually have more flexibility than people think, but there are definitely some smart guidelines,” the expert noted. “Dress with elegance and confidence, choosing sophisticated colors like navy, burgundy, emerald, blush, or even a beautiful floral print.”
“Definitely avoid white, ivory, cream, or champagne—those are all bride territory. Think flattering cuts like midi lace dresses, chic jumpsuits, or classic evening gowns, with lengths from cocktail to floor-length depending on the venue’s formality,” Megan continued.
“Most importantly, ask the couple about any color preferences or restrictions, and coordinate with the mother of the bride—you should complement each other without looking like you planned matching outfits,” the wedding expert shared. “Some brides actually love when their families coordinate with the wedding palette.”
“The goal is to look polished and celebration-worthy without upstaging anyone, while choosing something that makes you feel fabulous,” she added.
So what’s the appropriate response if someone shows up wearing white? “This is where it gets tricky because you’re balancing keeping the peace with protecting the bride’s day,” Megan noted. “In most cases, the bride should be shielded from this drama entirely—she’s got enough on her plate.”
Image credits: George Chambers (not the actual photo)
“When someone chooses to wear white knowing it’ll cause problems, they’re telling you everything you need to know about their priorities”
“If it’s an honest mistake, a gentle heads-up from the maid of honor, a bridesmaid or wedding planner works: ‘Hey, you look gorgeous, but do you have a jacket or pashmina? We’re trying to keep white reserved for the bride today.’ Keep it kind, quiet, and solution-oriented, as publicly shaming someone only amplifies the awkward,” the expert suggested.
However, if it’s clearly intentional, you might need backup. “Having someone on standby with a wrap, jacket, or even an ‘accidental’ red wine situation isn’t unheard of in wedding planning circles,” Megan revealed. “Etiquette is about protecting everyone’s moment, not starting a fashion intervention that steals the bride’s spotlight.”
Finally, the expert noted that weddings are emotional, glamorous, and often unfiltered days. “But remember: it’s a celebration of them, not a runway for you. Let the bride glimmer in white, and the rest of us can shine in our favorite complementary shades,” she told Bored Panda. “Thoughtful attire doesn’t dim you, it dignifies you. And it keeps the focus exactly where it belongs: on love, not the look.”
“The drag queen solution from this story? Honestly brilliant,” Megan says. “Sometimes when someone’s being deliberately disrespectful, you need to fight drama with bigger, better drama. Those queens probably made sure everyone knew exactly who the real stars of the show were, and they gave the bride an unforgettable story to tell for years.”
“The bottom line is this: weddings bring out people’s true colors. When someone chooses to wear white knowing it’ll cause problems, they’re telling you everything you need to know about their priorities,” the expert says. “Smart couples and their support teams often have an idea of these situations ahead of time and can plan for it. Unfortunately, they’re more common than anyone wants to admit.”
Later, the author responded to several comments and shared more details about the situation
Many readers applauded the friend for their brilliant plan
Follow Us
