“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

There are questions we might not get answers to. Like: Where is Cleopatra’s tomb? Or what caused the Big Bang? But certain secrets reveal themselves to us whether we’re digging or not.

After Wendy Brown, co-host of the ‘Existential Couch‘ podcast, asked her Threads followers, “What’s something you accidentally found out that you were definitely never supposed to know?”, hundreds of people responded with stories about family relationships, local church scandals, and much, much more. So grab a bunch of biscuits, because we’re serving a lot of tea!

#1

While I was volunteering 30 hours a week, our pastor’s wife was on annual salary for $100K

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: advancelivesinternational, Samuel Peter/Pexels (not the actual photo)

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

#2

My grandfather was a womanizer and had affairs all over town. My mom and aunt didn’t realize their convo was being recorded by the answering machine. 17 minutes of dish.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: justboo5, Tima Miroshnichenko/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#3

That my sister, the middle child, has a different dad than me and my brother… my mom doesn’t know I know 🙃

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: evajean.reads, www.kaboompics.com/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#4

My dad isnt really my bio dad. Thanks 23&me 🫠

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: tx2nm26 , Anatolii Grytsenko/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#5

That my mum wasn’t sick. She would receive calls from “doctors” in the day. Turned out, those were her lovers

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: nurkozaki, www.kaboompics.com/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#6

My now Ex-husband was planning on secretly buying a house with his son using money we had both saved for us to buy a house together The next day I went to the bank & took out my half.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: mystylelounge, cottonbro studio/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#7

I caught my mom cheating on my dad. With her sisters husband. I was seven.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: midliferambles, Yan Krukau/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#8

My grandmother’s ‘brother’ was actually her son. He was passed off as her brother her whole life. I have no idea who the father was, she took that to the grave. But she was 12 years old when she gave birth in rural Alabama.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: bohemianhijabi, Paolo Sbalzer/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#9

Buckle up, kids, because this is a story. My mom started bringing this guy around, I got a really bad feeling about him. She wouldn’t tell me anything about him. So, with nothing more than a first name and what he looked like, I hopped on the state offender registry and found him. I called her afterwards and a) she knew b) she was mad I even looked into it and c) she didn’t tell me because of “how I’d react”. I said, “bring him around me again and he’s going to be missing a micro appendage”

bethannesbest:
How old were you at the time? Just curious

doyleness.7138 (OP):
Barely 17. It was highly illegal for him to be around me and she knew it. I also carried a hunting knife on my hip at all times at that particular point in time, and am afraid of nobody. She brought him to my high school graduation across state lines with a ton of kids around when I explicitly told her not to, as well. They’re married now and we don’t talk.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: doyleness.7138, Murat IŞIK/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#10

When I was a child I went exploring while visiting family and ended up in the basement. A door was ajar, light streaming into the darkness and the smell! It stank like a skunk. I opened the door and saw rows and rows of plants under lights. Tin foil was on the walls. Suddenly a strong hand yanked me out of the room and I got yelled at. It was very confusing at the time but later I definitely figured out what kind of plants they were lol.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: saragoodvibes, Blue Arauz/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#11

My ex’s father, a staunch Republican, entered this country from England without any paperwork. Never the less, he voted, even held a local office in spite of not being a citizen. He could never travel internationally because he couldn’t get a passport. He was a bigot as well.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: kathyquiltsandsews, Centre for Ageing Better/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#12

When I was 23/24, with a master’s degree, I was being paid slightly less than a male intern who still hadn’t graduated college. Talk about your salaries, Thriends.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: alldayidreamoftravel, Alena Darmel/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#13

Once when I was a little kid, I was looking at my parents’ wedding album. They got married in September, and I was born the following March. 👀

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: modernmomprobs, Natalia Olivera/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#14

My mother skipped my highschool graduation to play Bingo with her friends

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: kennymac_1939, Sóc Năng Động/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#15

When I was 14 I found out my grandma was really not my grandmother. My grandpa had been married and had 4 kids she passed away and he married my grandma. When I turned 17 my mom did finally “tell” me. She didn’t want me to treat my grandma any different. Never did. Loved that woman!!!!

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: txmomteacher2, Kampus Production/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#16

I accidentally found my now husband’s ex wife’s diary. He and I had just started dating. She sent over boxes that had been in storage and left a notebook/diary in there. I knew he left her for cheating on him and he said she had mental health issues. She was obsessed w The Secret. Then I found the notebook and 😳. She had written pages and pages about loving money, the smell of money, the feel of money, MONEY MONEY MONEY. Then she had written drafts of apology letters to him where she half apologized for cheating, but also blamed him, but also denied it. It was like reading the rantings of a raving lunatic. Something def wrong w her. I admitted to him what I found when he came home and cried, saying I understood if he broke up w me bc I shouldn’t have read it; I was looking for a dvd and thought it was a kid’s book of drawings. But once I started reading I couldn’t stop! He laughed and said it was okay; he was kinda glad bc now I understood what he had dealt with.
bebothebold:
Omg girl this is WILD!

_plasticangels (OP):
IT WAS. He’d told me she had issues w/o being a jerk about it, so I already believed him, but I also didn’t know the full extent. He didn’t want to be THAT guy who’s mean about his ex so how could he fully explain it?! Finding that made it all make sense; he said their marriage counselor had told him to run bc she was narcissistic and needed a psych eval bc she was splitting.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: _plasticangels, George Milton/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#17

Found out that I was divorced and I had no idea. I was still living with my “ex-husband” and our kids when I found out. Twenty three years down the drain.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: karmyskorner, cottonbro studio/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#18

First, that my mom had been married before. Then, that dad had been married before. And finally, that I had a half brother no one told me about.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: ericabelinda, Sara Er/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#19

An email chain between HR, the GM, asst. GM and dept head discussing how they were going to fire someone in an egregiously illegal fashion. The emails acknowledged they had no grounds but it would save the company $xxx going forward.
I sent it to myself then deleted the sent email, took a picture of the screen as well.
I really didn’t care for the person they were after so I let it play out. Then because I’m not a complete [jerk] I sent her the evidence anonymously. She sued and won.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: garymillershoots, Alicia Christin Gerald/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#20

My father was still married and got my mom pregnant while her roommate was his daughter

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: Cmilling52, Jacob Evans/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#21

That my white dad who had married a black Jamaican woman (my mom) was quoted in the Toronto Star as not hiring “those people” back in the 70s when interviewed about his company. My auntie let it slip a few years ago and ugh. I’ve yet to unpack that in therapy.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: kelly_em_ka, SHVETS production/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#22

That my grandmother was already pregnant w another man’s child in 1941 and my grandfather married her and raised my uncle as his own.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: ceblaw618, Sunvani Hoàng/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#23

That our father had passed away six months before my bro-in-law accidentally found out when sorting out his own father’s estate last year. The step mother still hadn’t informed us that he has passed away.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: drkateringvall, RDNE Stock project/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#24

My whole life my mom told me that I was put in child protective services when I was a baby because when she was driving, she turned around to check on me in the car seat and accidentally hit a pole. And someone called CPS saying she had taken me. When I was 19 a woman found me on my space and sent me pictures of myself as a baby. I’ve never seen before and said that the real reason I was taken was because my mom had left me at a babysitter‘s house as a newborn for multiple days in a row. It took her two years to get me back. And I can’t blame her. She was a single mom working at General Mills factory like 16 hour days. And I highly doubt they had paid maternity leave in the 90s. They probably expected her to get back to work right after having a baby. My mom was a hoarder, was my first bully, and became pretty controlling because she was worried that my dad would try to harm me. He left a homemade explosive device on our house that caught a corner of the house on fire when I was like seven. So when I was in my mid 20s and Called, the Lawyer that I represented my mom asking for the file so I could figure out who the woman was that reached out to me with photos of myself at age one and two, he said he was the one who encouraged my mom to fight to keep me. He asked if he made a mistake. I told him no, but I feel like I lied. End of this day I don’t know the name of the lady who took care of me as my foster mom because my space deleted all the messages off its app on accident

Image source: diy_queensunflower

#25

I was always told my grandfather was discharged from the Army. Turns out he was stealing whatever he could get his hands on from the military while stationed in Japan – to the point where the military had his landlines tapped. He was very much dishonorably discharged and no one knows except my Nana. And now me.

Image source: _avmartinez

#26

My dad was gay and cheated on my mom with men 🤷🏻‍♀️

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: beatlemom_reads, John Betancur/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#27

My aunt was mad at my mother one day. My aunt came into my place of work when I was 16 years old. She informed me that my mother had been married before she married my father and my oldest brother was not my father‘s son.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: lmorgank75, Vitaly Gariev/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#28

When my dad was going through Alzheimer’s and dementia he thought I was his brother and confided in me that his son is the antichrist. I’m an only child, I had a brother but he passed early from SIDS. It was eye-opening because it made a lot of things about him click

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: matthew_t.writes

#29

I found out someone got the sack by reading our job postings at work. “Oh, weird, is $Marina leaving?” “WHAT” “Do you not read the job postings? Guys, honestly.”
My country’s social security system is probably held together with tape, literal bugs, chewy, and blutak

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: 12112674r

#30

Both sets of grandparents altered their declared wedding date so it was more than 9 months prior to their first borns birthdate.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: jendude15, Darya Sannikova/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#31

After my sister passed away, my mom took up journaling but would leave pages wide open throughout the house. I didn’t even need to turn a page to see that I’m not something worth living for.

Image source: aabro92

#32

My mother had an abortion when I was a teen. 😳

Image source: alison_berrios_murray

#33

As a teen I was going through my parents stuff and saw on their marriage certificate that my dad was married before. According to mom, the girl said she was pregnant but lied,and that he punched her and divorced her.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: hotmessporterexpress, Abbey Chapman/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#34

I was supposed to be aborted but my mother was guilted into having me. All the distance between us was explainable now. It’s not that she didn’t like me, she didn’t want another child.

“Thanks 23&Me”: 45 Times People Found Out Something That Was Purposely Hidden From Them

Image source: crawlingwithcats, Kampus Production/Pexels (not the actual photo)

#35

Moved around a lot as a kid because of my parents jobs. Didn’t have many friends or a “real home” because of this. One night I’m chillin with the fam and we’re reminiscing about childhood. Dad lets it slip that the reason we moved so much was because he discovered that his employer was embezzling money. Naturally, he did the right thing and escalated the situation. That boss put a bounty on my dad’s head and when my dad found out we moved that night. Mind blowing stuff dude.

Image source: saint.exe

#36

It’s time…
My ex left me suddenly, no warning, no explanation. I asked if there was anyone else, be said no.
A month or so later I’d started a casual thing with a dude local-ish to me. I deliberately didn’t tell him anything about my ex, not even his name. One evening the new dude calls to share ‘something funny’ he’d just figured out. Turns out *his* ex started seeing *my* ex a little while before he left me.
He said he was single and cheated on me with her the night I went to Eras Tour (after he bailed and I sold his ticket to a friend) then two nights later after he’d been for a nice dinner with me and my family in the city — he’d gone back to a hotel, his excuse being that he had work early the next morning. I tried SO hard to get my head around this ridiculous coincidence. Socially & geographically it made no sense. I’m from a small seaside town, my casual dude lived in a bigger seaside city, ex was from the midlands and he met her in London (after chatting on IG DMs). No mutuals or mixing. Just a small world? Btw, they weren’t together long. I think he just used her as an ‘out’, and/or an ego boost, which is slimy.
And apparently when he dumped her, he said ‘I can’t morally be with you, because I cheated on my ex with you’. She’d had no idea I existed until then. A darkly funny thing also — *he* found out I was seeing the gal’s ex because she told him ‘he’s been seeing a woman called Grace from (my small town)’. She confirmed my full name and photo still with no clue who I was to him. In that moment, he must have been SO spooked. And then realised this meant I’d know what he did. Karma didn’t mess around.

Image source: grace_literally

#37

My boss left everyone’s salary record on the printer. I had just been promoted and my replacement was making $20k more than me. Asked for raise, got $3k or told I could quit 🤬🤬🤬🤬

Image source: iloveroses56

#38

I snooped when I was a teacher’s helper (lol) in elementary school, I found a letter saying one of the student’s dads was “a raging alcoholic 100%”, the kid was kinda buddies with my little brother and the dad pulled over and tried to drive us home after school one day and I refused. I even heard him telling my dad later that we said no to a ride but at the time I never told my dad why. Of all the things I’ve given into, I’m glad I didn’t put me or my little brother in that car. Feel bad for his son.

Image source: candiceviolette

#39

My grandpa in his younger years made a fortune for being a “donor” to the Amish community. I’m told it’s a common practice. But I laugh so hard just thinking of all the Amish guys out there that look just like my grandpa, just with a beard 😆

Image source: alexellingson12

#40

I hit redial on my now ex-husband’s office phone and it called his mistresses voice mail and I got to hear all the saved messages she was keeping from my husband regarding their future plans together.

Image source: mrs.oc.now

#41

Finding an entire box of my teeth in my mom’s side table was pretty traumatic…

Image source: chicknamedd

#42

One of my ‘close’ friends growing up was actually sleeping with my brother and I had no idea while it was happening. I think my whole friend group knew and kept it from me. Didn’t find out til almost a decade later by an outside source that stayed at my house for a week.

Image source: kadumsx3

#43

While in college I found out that my professor was having an affair with one of the staff ladies

Image source: ashbullman1122

#44

My grandmas sister let it slip that my grandparents had to sell their beloved Sailboat (that was named after me) because of my dad. He was a Jr. and racked up credit card debt in my grandpas name. They had 2 options turn my dad in to the police or pay off the debt.

Image source: copperbcrochet

#45

A company I worked for accidentally shared access to HR dashboards to everyone in the company. The company with 70% female employees, and yet men had the highest salaries. There’s departments with all female staff except for male managers and supervisors. 🙃 so yeah I got to literally see the wage gap in real life spelled out in pretty dashboards and graphs. It was so bad that when I reported the access, my male manager said that if I wanted to talk about it with him or HR, he supported me. Pretty sure the only reason it didn’t cause company wide outrage is because while they had shared access to everyone in the company, it wasn’t like a pushed alert or anything. I found it when I was trying to find my department KPI dashboard after they migrated to a different server. Our dashboard names were similar and I clicked on the wrong one. Apparently the access permissions were not carried over during the migration

Image source: blue_strawberrywitch